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Hey y’all! I have a poem I wanted to share and get some critique on. 😉 I’ll do some tags, then share the poem I wrote…probably about…two months ago! 🙂 @gracie-j. @koshka. @katthewriter. @joy-caroline. @lrose5. @ava-blue. @lydia-s. @lorelei-writer.
“Oh God, Where Are You?”
As the world spins,
Every day it seems as though Satan wins.
Our world is crumbling,
My Nation is breaking.
Morality is lost.
America needs God.
The world turns more gray.
No one wants to pray.
Everyone thinks it’s all just a game.
Oh God, where are you?
America needs to find her way back to you.
She’s run.
Far from her roots.
Oh God, I can’t even express how much she needs you.
Land of the Free,
Home of the Brave.
But oh, how far she has strayed.
From the beacon of light,
For the whole world to see.
If they could see her now,
What would our founding fathers say?
If they saw how far America has strayed.
If they looked around,
at all we’ve thrown away.
They would say, and cry,
“Why did we even fight?”
Were lives truly lost in vain,
Because of all the freedoms we’ve willingly thrown away?
Oh God, where are you?
My Nation needs you.
@freedomwriter76
Ok, just wow. SO TRUE. I LOVE IT! I could rant for a while about stuff in America but I won’t… Like it’s confusing but I’m proud to be free but not at the same time. Originally we were free to be Christ-like but now we’re free to be whatever. And that whatever is NOT what God or the founding fathers wanted America to be like. *sighs* I don’t even keep up with politics cause they’re confusing but yeah. lolYou can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me.
C.S. Lewis
- Rank: Chosen One
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@lrose5. Thank you. Yes, so sad, but it’s so true. *sigh* Well…this poem probably came from a place about rant about what’s going on and politics, honestly. I could rant on and on about it all too. I get what you’re saying! (there’s very good reasons our parents decided to homeschool years ago, that’s all I can say.) My mom keeps up with a lot of politics, so I mostly know what I do from her. But I get what you’re saying, girl! 😉
@freedomwriter76
Yes… Same!! I think. lol We’re homeschooled for manyy reasons. Well, I like being homeschooled bc of those reasons-politics, peer pressure, teenagers nowdays… lol Yeah, I hear from my parents too cause articles are confusing. lolYou can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me.
C.S. Lewis
- Rank: Chosen One
- Total Posts: 8156
@lrose5. Yes. All of those reasons, plus what they teach in schools nowadays!? Articles are confusing, lol. XD
@freedomwriter76 GIRL THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL!!! I got chills! Thank you for sharing! 😀
the resident romance ghost; last seen within the pages of a gothic novel
Ach, I uh, got something in my eye 🤧
@freedomwriter76 That was wonderful!! It feels very urgent and remorseful (in a good way, of course)
I love how it reads like a prayer, it’s really beautiful!
that a northern wind
would cool my skin
and fill my lungs again- Rank: Chosen One
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@freedomwriter76 You’re so welcome!! Haha, you certainly do!!!
the resident romance ghost; last seen within the pages of a gothic novel
@freedomwriter76 Wow, that’s really amazing!! So well-written and beautiful!
As for critique, maybe change “She’s run” to “she has run.”
Writing is a journey . . . journey for the Lord.
- Rank: Chosen One
- Total Posts: 8156
@lorelei-writer. Aww, thank you girl! 😀
Thank you for the critique! 😉
@freedomwriter76
BEAUTIFUL!!!! I love it, and it’s so true.
- Rank: Chosen One
- Total Posts: 8156
@lydia-s. Aww, girl, thank you!!!! 💖💖💖 Y’all are so sweet! 🥰 And yes, sadly true. 🥺
@freedomwriter76
Just read this…
SO TRUE!!! Such a good poem. It carries so much truth. I agree with what @lrose5 said,
I could rant for a while about stuff in America but I won’t… Like it’s confusing but I’m proud to be free but not at the same time. Originally we were free to be Christ-like but now we’re free to be whatever. And that whatever is NOT what God or the founding fathers wanted America to be like. *sighs*
Thanks for sharing!! <3
Write what should not be forgotten. — Isabel Allende
Interesting and Nice Poem
[quote quote=114362] @freedomwriter76 Ok, just wow. SO TRUE. I LOVE IT! I could rant for a while about stuff in America but I won’t… Like it’s confusing but I’m proud to be free but not at the same time. Originally we were free to be Christ-like but now we’re free to be whatever. And that whatever is NOT what God or the founding fathers wanted America to be like. *sighs* I don’t even keep up with politics cause they’re confusing but yeah. lol[/quote]
I love Politics!!! 😁
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