Home Page › Forums › Fiction Writing › Critiques › Novel Critique Requests › I’ve started my draft, would you guys keep reading this story?
- This topic has 238 replies, 17 voices, and was last updated 3 months ago by MineralizedWritings.
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December 12, 2022 at 5:16 pm #124233
You’re not obligated! If you want to though, just do it whenever works best for you 🙂
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
December 13, 2022 at 6:00 pm #124313Yeah… Keiryn… I don’t know what to think about you, buddy. One minute I’m shaking my head at you and the next I’m liking you again. 😂 You confuse me…
Good chapter, though!
December 13, 2022 at 9:03 pm #124337Lol I love how confusing he is turning out to be
*rubs hands together sneakily*
hehe
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
December 13, 2022 at 10:16 pm #124342I just read through these and they’re awesome! I love these characters and their friendship dynamic.
A little curious about what happens next…
Especially considering the foliage there….
And this really fascinating character development you have going on….
And how you have left us completely in the dark….
And the art is beautiful!
You have listened to fears, child. Come, let me breathe on you... Are you brave again? -Aslan
December 14, 2022 at 12:30 am #124358Thanks!
Especially considering the foliage there….
Not sure exactly what you mean… perhaps I am unlearned in my writing terms lol. I mean, I had to look up what wip meant at some point…
I’m glad you like it! 😁
Haha, I love leaving readers in the dark the most. 😀
hehe
Oh and glad you like the art! Thanks!
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
December 14, 2022 at 12:43 am #124359Welcome!
Not sure exactly what you mean… perhaps I am unlearned in my writing terms lol. I mean, I had to look up what wip meant at some point…
Sorry, I was referring to a flower I remembered to play a role. I didn’t want to be too specific just in case 1. It was a spoiler, and 2. Something had changed
I didn’t look up what WIP meant… Just spent several months guessing. XD I think I finally asked my siblings. XD
Of course! Leaving readers in the dark is always fun. (Plus it’s fun to be the reader and make wild assumptions that sometime turn out to be true. Sometimes.)
You have listened to fears, child. Come, let me breathe on you... Are you brave again? -Aslan
December 14, 2022 at 12:47 am #124360Ah yes, the flower. 😂
Complete change of story trajectory. I decided at some point that my story felt dead, perhaps because my second main conflict was Tauren getting infected by a plant that was a artifact of the biological warfare that occurred at the surface, he’d start to go blind and, idk I just didn’t like it at some point 😂 it doesn’t get much worse than him going blind, but I messed around with it a bit and just dropped it entirely at some point.
So yeah. Glad I changed it, although I still feel like it was an interesting concept, it just felt lonely and sad to write.
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
December 20, 2022 at 1:43 pm #124972@theloonyone @loopylin @lightoverdarkness6 @felicity
@whalekeeper @arien @starofthenorth @pen_for_christ205Ok! May I make announcement?
Thank yall for following my story, I appreciate it a lot enjoy sharing it with you all! I seem to be having a major plot upheaval, and may be re-writing the whole thing. I’ll still use some scenes here and there. I prayed about a title awhile ago, and praise the lord, I got some ideas last night! Which is your favorite?
the Afterthoughts
Afterthoughts of hate
Afterthoughts of war
I’ve gotten feedback from my sister that it’s a little to vague to peak interest, so any suggestions to change them would be much appreciated!
This might seem random, but it connects to the story pretty well. here’s some background you guys probobly don’t know yet.
The title comes from the origins story. Set 400 years after a devastating civil war, the MC’s are a piece of of the population left over. The two major politicians who started the war stirred up hate to gain followers, but they both just ended up dyeing in the end anyways. They only cared about gain. The remains of the two groups decided to cut any unnecessary contact with the other side to prevent further warfare. Now that the outside world is slowly repairing itself due to lack of habitation, people still refuse to leave out of fear. the idea is that the MC’s are the afterthoughts of the war, or hate, that happened long ago.
Ok so just ideas, I’ve got a lot of things I want to happen. I think I will continue with my plot as it is in sharing it with yall, but I might just use it as a rough plan and really change things for the final draft. In the original Lesli’s parents got divorced in the middle of the story, I still don’t know what’s best.
Anyways, yeah. I’ll still be sharing stuff here, but it might be more random. I’m learning medibang for comics, so hopefully I’ll get to show yall some of that! What do you guys think about the title ideas?
This is all quite confusing to me, so I might just keep writing as if nothing happened and work in the new ideas as they fit.
- This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by MineralizedWritings.
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
December 20, 2022 at 4:35 pm #124992Ok! May I make announcement?
Of course! Anytime! 😀
Hmm…since I’m a short title kind of girl, I like The Afterthoughts. You could even go for one word if you wanted, Afterthoughts. I think that word is poignant and gives just enough information to get you to want more, like I’d start thinking, “What or who’s the afterthought? Why are they afterthoughts…” etc. and then I’d have to get the book to find out.
No matter what you decide to change or keep, I’m sure the end result is going to be amazing! (Unless you take out Tauren altogether, which would be tragic!) 😂
- This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by Felicity.
He must increase, but I must decrease.
December 20, 2022 at 4:56 pm #125007I agree with @felicity that The Afterthoughts or Afterthoughts is short and sweet. I don’t find it vague at all. But of course, go with whatever sounds best to you 🙂
“Everything is a mountain”
December 20, 2022 at 5:07 pm #125012Thanks! That’s what other people have said too.
Thanks!
Removing Tauren from the story!? I would never!😥🤣
He’s my sweet boi!
That would be tragic!
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
December 20, 2022 at 5:10 pm #125017Good, good! I’m glad you feel that way! I just wanted to see how far you were going with these revisions. Sometimes us writers can be ruthless to ourselves. 🤣
He must increase, but I must decrease.
December 20, 2022 at 6:03 pm #125024Yeah lol! Those revisions can be rough. But I would never remove Tauren!
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
December 20, 2022 at 6:37 pm #125029*twirls around singing “Tauren Forever!”*
He must increase, but I must decrease.
December 20, 2022 at 6:40 pm #125031Can’t wait to see your revised version! I think I like the title Afterthoughts the best
“Nothing says autumn like slurpin’ apples.” -my uncle
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