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  • MineralizedWritings posted an update 2 months, 1 week ago

    @whalekeeper @loopylin

    I would love some plotting help from you guys if you have the time! I’m thinking about starting one of my stories as a webtoon and I’m wanting to work out the kinks first.

    I’m tagging you guys because it’s a lot darker than my other story and I didn’t think you would mind lol.

    Basically, there’s a point that could be a major plot twist, but I think I could include it in the very first chapter as the inciting incident. Idk…

    So this is for my story OLH I’ll call it for now. Basically, a 6 planet system is on the verge of interspace warfare, and one of the planets (I’ll call it planet 1) wants to take advantage of the unease and rule the entire system. The ruler has employed a doctor (name needed lol), who is also the best scientist in their planet. She has discovered a science that can create a sort of mental decline by removing certain elements from planets. Because emotions exist in their liquid form in the planets, they can be removed and used. The people from the planet she has tested on have fled, but she and the ruler have devised a experiment to see how the changed planet affects people.

    He has gathered unwanted people from other planets who were given up willingly (They don’t want to show force and let on to their plans) one from the prison (Ferimiah, a knight who was imprisoned for a illegal marriage to the princess) One came from a quarantine (Flax) and then theirs Mel who I haven’t decided on backstory yet lol. The scientist is disgusted that he chose the least, and reminds him their science will have to outdo even the best of the other planets, smart people like her.

    So at this point he tells her that she will be participating in her own experiment, taking notes on hers and the others decline.

    Idk what to do. That would be a great place to drop off episode one, right after we meet her and discover her predicament. Who says you aren’t allowed to know the villains side from day one?

    Alternatively, she takes notes and views from a distance, informing the reader of the conditions of the experiment. We don’t actually know her until further into the story, when the ruler she is working with decides he has no more use of her and puts her into the experiment to continue her notes.

    There’s a lot of parts to this and idk…
    I like doing it as the first episode bc it’s a great hook. What do you guys think?

    • It’s so funny that I (and Loops now?) have a reputation of being fine with darkness 😂 Am I darker than the average person?
      Ooh, okay, so is this female scientist going to have a redemption arc? Either I would assume that by reading from her POV, or I would assume she is only going to be an initial POV character as an intro to the world and story.
      I really like the idea you have here! Especially the idea that the scientist is eventually subject to her own experiment. I think it’s a great hook 🙂

    • Ooo I love this story idea.
      So you’re asking if the scientist lady should be forced into the experiment in the first episode or in a later episode, right?
      I agree it’s a great hook, but I guess it depends on how much world building and stuff you want to fit in before that happens to her. Maybe you want some time to show what her normal life looks like as a scientist or something? Idk I lost my train of thought here sorry

      I think it would work great in the first episode. 🙂

      Also, yeah, it is kinda funny that we have that reputation. It’s kinda accurate for me, but I didn’t think I was saying anything that would give me away. XD

      @whalekeeper Nah, I think you’re a normal amount of dark. But maybe my opinion isn’t the most accurate lol

      • @loopylin
        Thanks 🙂
        @whalekeeper @loopy

        Thank you guys so much for your feedback! Showing a bit of her normal life before could be a good idea…. hmmm I’ll think about it.
        Lol, I can just tell. I can’t remember what it was loopy said a long time ago but somehow I knew. Oh, and when Whaley told me abt her dragon prince pfp she warned me abt content so that was how I knew she was ok with more 😂

        And no Whaley you are not darker than the average person, but you are darker than the average kp user XD

        And yeah she will have a redemption arc but she is also the main villain. Kinda like Zuko, y’know, takes awhile. Maybe she should just be a initial pov character, because she isn’t really the protagonist.

        Thanks! Helps me brainstorm lol

    • I’m…uh…intrigued already

      • a little dark, yes, but it can also show something beautiful if handled correctly. If you feel led to do this, then I say don’t shy away from it <3

        • @freed_and_redeemed

          Ahoy there! I didn’t tag you because I wasn’t sure you would be comfortable with it, but hello!

          Glad you find it intriguing lol!

          I’m still thinking on what to do about it. This story was something I started during the darkest depression I’ve ever felt. I think me wanting to continue it is partially because I have seen a lack of awareness for mental health issues in Christian groups. I think it’s hard to understand until you’ve experienced it. So yeah, I thought about making a world where hope literally ceases to exist, cuz that’s just what it felt like. In reality, we need God to get through these kinds of things, but tbh I don’t feel ready to write a ‘god’ kind of character into my book… so I need to make another way for biblical themes.

          I think the main theme right now is that even in our darkest moments, we have to keep pushing forwards. It’s the kind of story I needed to read when I was depressed, I guess. I would have felt seen.

          Oh, and that just because you’ve been working your whole life towards something doesn’t mean it isn’t too late to make a better choice.

          Btw how are you doing?

          • I am loving those themes. I feel you there, girl…it really does sometimes feel like Christians don’t understand. My BFF has dealt with a lot of mental health, so she does understand, but I know what you mean <3
            I absolutely love the idea.

            I'm doing well! Juggling school, church, writing, family, and all of the things, 😂, but doing well! I've felt close to God lately and I've felt closer to my family (it's helping that we have an almost nightly tradition of watching Lois&Clark all together and nightly Bible readings💕) and I just feel so…free rn. God's really been helping me see/understand his love/forgiveness in a way I never really understood before <3
            And writing is going well…I'm currently going back through my manuscript so I can suggest edits and things bc Amazon has finished editing all 37 chapters of Freedom's Fire, so as soon as I get all of the editing finished, they'll be moving onto the formatting stage!✨✨✨

            and I am currently 9 finished chapters, almost half of chapter 10, and almost 15k words into Broken Shackles, the sequel, which I hope to finish by at least 2025, hehe.

            so I'm doing well!!
            What about you? <3

            • @freed_and_redeemed

              Thanks! <3

              That sounds like a awesome family tradition! My family sometimes likes to watch this show called hoarders where professional cleaners (And therapists) help hoarders get there houses back.

              I'm so glad for your that you are getting that understanding and freedom! <3

              Oh cool! Doesn't it feel so great to see your hard work pay off?! 😃

              I'm really up and down lol. My health is kinda catching up to me and I'm going to start going to doctors again… I haven't been in a long time because of some negative experiences. My mental health has been reaaaaally bad (Bc it's linked to my physical health) and the worst part about it is sometimes I mistake it for spiritual struggles… only to realize I'm just not doing well overall. 😅😅

              On a happier note though, I'm watching a new anime, and it really gives me something to look forwards to at the end of the day. A week or so ago I was praying abt the fact that all the super popular animes have too much dark nasty stuff in them, so I wasn't able to feel like a part of the hype…

              And like literally days after that I discovered one that's been quite clean so far, and it's like kinda adrenaline rushing which is just what I like. My life is boring so I rely on shows for excitement LOL

              Oh, and I've been learning a lot about my personality type and it's helping me understand why I have such a hard time making friends. I'm a infj, and people with that type tend to put a TON of effort into relationships, but expect it back. That's literally me. If somebody isn't giving back to the extent I do, I don't want them 😅😂 but I'm learning to understand some people just hang out for fun and don't think like me, and that doesn't make it a bad thing.

              Thanks for asking!

    • @mineralizedwritings
      The string of commenting on comments is maxed 😂
      *Is probably more bothered by the darkness comment than I need to be* Most of my writing is composed of jokes and exaggerated candy metaphors! 😭 That stupid human Pokémon story will never leave me. Never.
      Any I love the redemption idea. I’ve never actually tried a redemption arc before but it sounds like a fun idea 🙂
      I’m still hoping and praying for your steady recovery. Apathetic doctors are the worst. You shouldn’t have to deal with that ❤️❤️ And you know what, if an anime makes you happy, shoot, watch a few episodes now and then because you deserve it.
      INFJs 4-EVER 😘 Gotta stick together

      • @whalekeeper

        Oh I’m sorry I didn’t know it would bug you! I just tagged you and loopy because I knew it wouldn’t disturb you, everyone has different tolerance levels. I didn’t mean to say you are a dark person 😂

        Thanks!

        And thank you for the prayers! <3

        Lol are you infj too?

        Btw how are you doing?

        • It’s okay 🤪 I think there are specific types of dark, and I lean into a different type than others do on here. Like for some reason a lot of people here don’t write or read dark humor? But tragic/tortured/abusive backstories are common and detailed. It’s a weird combination of preferences, and I have to admit I don’t identify with those preferences. I also feel like the constant trauma-talk thing is a KP issue (meaning the community as whole). Like yes, I have a couple characters with bad issues, but maybe the topic gets too much focus… ? Idk 😂
          Ofc!
          Yes ma’am, I most certainly am. I sound pretty opinionated and occasionally extroverted on here, but in real life, I am the quiet therapist friend who has a hard time saying no 😅 My parents say I analyze people waaay too accurately and it’s affecting my mental health because I can’t seem to focus on myself. This is one of those places where I’m not afraid to say something controversial.
          I’m doing ishy-wishy-washy 😖 Very sick the past two weeks. Mentally, pretty good since I acknowledged my freezing fear of college. Speaking of watching anime, my dad decided to watch the live action Avatar first because he isn’t convinced the story is good! 😧🫣 I don’t know what he thinks now, but my mum told me she wants to watch the anime now 🥰

          • Also I’m sorry if I sounded pushy over the whole darkness topic! 😖

          • @whalekeeper

            I get that, maybe it does seem odd to other people. Dark humor is pretty much fine to me, Ig just depending on context like anything else.

            I think on kp where the *line* stands seems odd because it’s largely dependent on religious beliefs vs some standard. Like, most of us here are not comfortable with ‘creepy’ stuff. For example, most of us here would be ok with Aang’s tragic backstory and the genocide of the airbenders, but would be pretty weirded out by the facestealer monster (Sorry I don’t actually know what part of the show that’s from). Also why I haven’t and probably won’t see multiverse of madness. It’s a different type of darkness. I do know many christains who are ok with stuff like this though because to them it’s ‘just fantasy’. So it’s personal conviction based. I actually think a lot of this has to do with the family you are raised in. I was raised watching veggietales and wonder pets, with little exposure to the world until I joined public school, so these things were not in my convictions. I feel like it would be sin for me, however I’m not going to project that onto somebody else obviously. Besides, I have a vivid imagination and I don’t need to feed myself nightmare fuel.

            The kind of darkness on kp is the kind people experience in real life, whether to more or less degrees. I think quite a few here write based on personal experience, wanting a way to express their emotions about things in their lives. When I first came to kp it was a bit of a shock (Remember when I was new I made that topic about dark writing and if it’s too much?)

            Honestly (and don’t take this wrong lol) I think you’re just different than some of the people here, and that’s fine. You don’t share a lot of your wip, or a whole lot about yourself, compared to others here. Some people like to trauma dump online, I’ve definitely done it here before. Maybe it’s because we’re all teenagers, and we have a high volume of teenagers who are comfortable trauma dumping, so they do. I’m sorry but happy things don’t give me much emotions because I’m sad most of the time. So I share the things I relate to most, which is sad things. Maybe it isn’t super healthy, I guess it gets others down when you share sad stuff. Sometimes when I’m annoyed by all the sad writing here I just tell myself that person is trying to understand something, and in some way, this helps them. I’m not obligated to read it if I don’t like it.

            You weren’t too pushy! It’s a good thing to talk about and I definitely enjoyed writing this up…. oh goodness it’s so long I’m sorry 😖

            • @whalekeeper

              That’s interesting. I analyze other people, but I also analyze myself to a further extent. I want to understand all the things my subconscious is hiding from me so I know exactly how I work XD

              Ah, freezing fear of college. Well, I’ve got a freezing fear of Uni. College isn’t so bad, who cares what people think anyways. You’ll have a much better time if you use rate my professor to find review before you sign up for classes too. Oh, and sign up early so you have choices.

              Oh no! I can’t imagine!! XD I really hope he doesn’t get a bad impression of it from the live action. I know it’s more serious, but I can’t get over Katara water bending for a little while before deciding she’s now a master 🤮 how cocky is that?

              “You peasant, you’ve found a master, haven’t you?!”
              “Yeah, you’re looking at her!” 💁‍♀️

              Like no. JUst no. And what happened to the arc of Aang being a prodigy and her feeling sad because he learned so fast?

              And why is Suki a jerk?

              Why is Sokka magically not sexist? Where did his arc go lol?!

              The visuals look great. But like common, Katara is not a master yet.

              I’m sorry, as you can see, I have opinions XD

            • Riiight, so it’s a distinction between objectively bad things/creepy/bordering on dark magic. I’ve understood the magic issue to some extent, it’s just a lot of the in-between stuff that bothers me.
              Side note, I was into Veggie Tales and Pixar 🙃
              I’m sorry for the little rampage here 😅 But someone can describe the details of their characters abuse, down to the raw senses and terror. Everyone’s into it… and then I get some clearly mixed feedback for a protagonist who has a generally creepy description.
              *Throws up hands*
              I definitely don’t think you’re overemotional with your story, btw <3 And I’m not sore at anyone in particular, just the weird dynamic.
              I remember I was partially the targeted audience of your darkness post (no grudge, I was in my edgy phase). Honestly? A couple months ago I seriously considered making a similar post. Sometimes the emotions are interesting, but sometimes they just… tire me.
              Trauma dumping is hard for me to wrap my head around, because on the one hand, I willingly acknowledge writers like you, who need an outlet but don’t have an irl person to talk to. But on the other, so many people just need to talk irl, or take a step back.
              I understand where you’re coming from, since emotional scenes stick the most. Stories don’t have to be happy all the time, but just imagine a story that doesn’t build up to those moments and is just serious and deep all the time! Like what live action Avatar did, instead of doing what the original does and giving the characters a basic status quo to fluctuate off of.
              It’s fun to bounce opinions back and forth 😝

            • Ah, yes, the elusive subconscious 🤣
              I’m almost definitely taking a gap year. Whenever I tell a well-to-do mom I’m not going to college right away, they’ll pause, and their eyes go glassy… it’s funny but intimidating because I’m not living up to expectations.
              The Katara thing!! Yeeess!!! I absolutely hated that! My dad rolled his eyes, and I had to tell him how inaccurate it was 😣 And those anti-sexist quotes were so cringe.
              But also. The romance with Sokka and Suki?? So bad, I wanted to cover my eyes 🫣
              I really liked most of the casting. Aang was cute and Zuko got some nice, justifiable screen time. The costumes are great too! But if we have to keep dealing with the woke elements, idk.
              Idk if you noticed, but the couple in the secret tunnel song were described as two women. No one else in my family noticed 😅
              Also, how do you think they are going to create an Aang x Katara romance? She’s practically his babysitter.

            • @whalekeeper

              Ah, I see where some of the confusion is. I think the best way I can explain it is that for the majority of the people here, creepy isn’t a shade of dark, it’s an entirely other animal that isn’t ok. I’m not trying to say your doing something wrong, just some people won’t be on board. It’s something that for me changes with exposure. I used to be really uncomfortable with anything borderline creepy, but now for me it has more to do with what it represents. I’m watching a sports thriller anime rn, and they use a visualization of a monster to describe visually the inner hunger the players have to get better. The monster doesn’t exist, so I’m not creeped out. However, even two years ago I wouldn’t have watched it. Idk if you get what I’m saying lol.

              Hm, y’know I think you are right there. Character abuse is sometimes used as a shock factor. My sister talks about this issue a lot, so I’ve heard a range of opinions. On one hand, it is disrespectful towards those who have been abused to not show the entirety of how horrible it is. We don’t want to minimize what they have been through. But on the other hand, abuse shouldn’t be added for the shock factor.

              I think sometimes some of us forget the age range here on KP. Most of us aren’t adults, and there’s things on here a 13 year old should not be reading. Tbh, the abusive descriptions on KP probably are too far, and I think they feed each other. We become more comfortable with it as we see others do it. It’s not really great.

              Cool! Veggie tales was the best. I didn’t mean to insinuate that your childhood wasn’t innocent 😂 I’m just aware of the fact I was a bit sheltered.

              I guess it is a weird dynamic, now that you point it out. Is it something that could be fixed by trigger warnings and you avoiding that content, or are you more of thinking of it as a kp issue you wished was different? You can make posts about these things, because tbh, there is a bit too much darkness here. I’m not too bothered by it because it helps me learn more about my peers, but that doesn’t mean it’s right.

              Hm. It’s hard to decipher. Trauma dumping can be a form of attention seeking too. I mean, people here do get a lot more attention for a poor trauma boy than a average happy one. I feel bad saying it, but it’s true.

              XD yes, I love talking about this kind of stuff. I need a philosophical conversation every now and then or I feel stale.

            • @whalekeeper

              Lol, that’s interesting. Well you should be proud for picking what works best for you, instead of doing the popular thing. You’re living up to your expectations, not theirs. Isn’t that important? 🙂

              Ikr? And honestly such a wordly strange way to approach it. I’ve read writing advice to use walking in on somebody to further a romance and just… 🤮🤮🤮 that’s disgusting and it was totally unnecessary. Also why did she approach him while he was practicing, show she was better, than just like leave? How rude! Rudeness does not equal strength. Doing things that say ‘I’m better than you’ is five year old behavior.

              Yes the casting was so good! I was very happy to have Aang instead of Oong. XD that movie… have you seen it?

              Ack that’s really bad. It was def a man and women in the original.

              Ok well… I haven’t actually watched any of the original content LOL. I’ve read the comics for after avatar (Firelord zuko!! 🤩🤩)
              but other than that I’ve seen basically the whole series in reaction videos. I might watch it correctly someday lol.

              I haven’t seen enough to really say. They didn’t have the katara and Aang in the tunnel thing, and honestly I wondered if it was because the actors age gap was uncomfortable, and it’s better to wait until season 2.

              I was sad they didn’t have the ‘Why are you smiling?”
              “Oh, I was smiling?” from the beginning of season 1. Tbh, I think you’re right. I haven’t really seen any romantic chemistry from them.

              Idk, maybe they’ll throw us a curveball and do Zutara…? I’m kidding lololol

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