My Superhero WIP

I think the second option is good, but I also think that she should have met him at least a few times even if she was too young to remember properly. But what if he’s not a mad-scientist? What if he’s actually good but there are some bad people who caught onto his experiment and have been funding him? However, the experiment is ready for experimental testing, but there are still a few bugs in it that the uncle doesn’t like. The bad-guys then reveal their true nature to him and threaten to kill Kaylee unless he experiments on him. However, Kaylee doesn’t know any of this and thinks her Uncle is bad. They try to make her a supervillain, but her Uncle risks his life to help her escape (they keep him alive though). She tries to get to her grandparents and it’s a race to see who can get there first, Kaylee or the bad guys. Just a quick idea I had.

@jenwriter17 What a cool bunch of ideas!  I like what @skredder suggested.  I will try to think of something, and let you know if I have any ideas.  So, do her “grandparents” care a lot for her?  What happened to her parents?  And do you know what theme you might be using?

I think biracial people are beautiful.  I guess one way you could let readers know how she looks is that you could have a picture of her on the front cover.  And I got the idea you might be biracial when I looked at the hairstyles on your pinterest board. 🙂

Not sure I was very helpful, but…

@jenwriter17 Whenever I hear “superhero WIP” I become wary because I pretty much hate Josiah’s stories, but I’ll try to give an unbiased opinion. 😛

So…my first thought on reading your ideas was that if I read the book I would immediately think her grandparents were villains.  Maybe you should play this up a bit, and either have her trust them and suddenly find out they’re bad, or have her trust them, find out they might be villains, and then have a big reveal where they weren’t actually villains, but the people she thought were good were actually bad, and her grandparents are actually the real good guys.  Either way, I think I would definitely suspect that her grandparents were villains, so you might want to hint at that being the case.

As for the biracial thing, I guess you might call me that too, since my dad is middle eastern and my mom is from here, but the word “race” really throws me off.  God created one race: the human race, and I know labeling different colors of skin helps to identify what someone looks like when describing them, but I don’t like the way it divides people.  I like what Ariel said about having her picture on the cover of your book.  That would immediately give the readers an idea of what she looks like.  Would it be possible to describe her parents or her without bringing race into it?  Could you just describe her dad’s “piercing dark eyes,” and “charcoal skin,” and her mom’s “fluffy blonde hair?”  Kaylee’s skin would be “olive” and her hair “frizzy,” or something like that?  What do you think?  In my opinion that would completely take away the sensitiveness of the subject.  Especially since “biracial” almost implies that it’s unusual, and it shouldn’t be considered weird for people to marry when their skin is a different shade from that of their spouse.

Oh, and about the grandparents being agents thing, that’s a cool idea, and I don’t think it makes much of a difference whether they are or not.  Either way would make a cool story.  Them being agents would probably work really well with the “villain suspicion” thing I was thinking, but they could even actually be related to her, like Spiderman’s – um, dad?  (I don’t really know the Spiderman story, I just heard that someone, I think his dad, was originally part of the experiments or something.) So they could be her actual grandparents and still be agents if you want to use both of your ideas.

Hope this gives you something…but I’m not sure what! 😉 😛

@jenwriter17 Here’s a thought, her mad scienctist uncle could have given her parents super powers. The bad guys found out he was experimenting with giving people powers, but don’t know he succeeded. The uncle knowing what they would do if they had the powers pretends to be far behind on his creation. He keeps all his notes in codes so the bad guys can’t read them, and pretends to be mad (eg. Reverting back to an extinct language (that maybe Kaylee can understand, because her parents would use it?), losing things in right in front of him, claiming something hat has been in one place a long time had just appeared, etc..)

I think that her grandparents should be her grandparents, but they want her uncle to give her the powers so the bad guys can’t kill her as easily (and so she can follow in her parents footsteps and protect people from the bad guys using the gift. They want to protect her and have her reach her potential.).
And she has two sets of grandparents so maybe the other set could get involved too. 🙂

What do you think?

@jenwriter17 *DISCLAIMER* I may not have been the one to call for this, because I’m not a big superhero person. I’ll try to be helpful though. *END OF DISCLAIMER. HAVE A NICE DAY*

My biggest advice would to work on all the villain’s motivations and make them human. I think you’ve got the opportunity to give Kaylee adversaries that will challenge her personally, something that isn’t all that common in superhero fiction. So give her people to fight that will get under her skin and mess with her mind and all that stuff us crazy writers seem to love to do to their poor characters. *rubs hands together whilst thunder booms in the background*

As for the general story, does Kaylee have friends that could impact her character arc? Is Kaylee interested in having powers, or does she want to remain normal? Are there a lot of superheroes and villains in the world?