Trailblazer

@savannah_grace2009

I’m sorry to hear about your mom! I’m sure it’s been rough, but I’m also glad Jesus is walking with you through it! I have a friend whose mom was also recently diagnosed with cancer and they’re now moving to another country for more affordable healthcare… it’s been hard for her to have her life upended so suddenly. These…[Read more]

@savannah_grace2009

Heyyy it’s good to see you back again too! I was just thinking about you! What’s new?

@godlyfantasy12

Oops got your tag wrong!

@godlyfantasy

Good to see you back! I’ve been gone for like five months, too, and I also don’t know how much I’ll be on here. I haven’t done much writing but I still have my stories sitting on the proverbial shelf, so I want to get back into it as soon as I’m in a good head space to do so… I’ve just gotten back from a season of learning and…[Read more]

@grcr

HIIIIII!!!! Glad you’re back!! I was thinking about you the other day! Good to know you’re alive lol! 😁

Lol glad I’m still alive, too!

@whalekeeper

Yeah I’m doing pretty well! I hope you are, too!

@loopylin

Hi welcome back! It’s good to see you too. Makes me happy when older KPers come back <3

I don’t even feel like an old KPer but I gue…[Read more]

Hey peoples…

I’m back!

It’s been a long hiatus, and I don’t know how active I’ll be on here going forward, but at least I’m not basically nonexistent anymore.

For those who have joined KP since June, welcome, and I hope to officially meet you soon! And for those of you who were around before, it’s good to “see” you again.

@ellette-giselle

Sorry I’ve been MIA… I just started a YWAM school this week so I’ve been really busy and haven’t had time to read anything on here. I’ll try to get to it sometime if I have a chance! If you need me just tag me so I see it and hopefully can get back to you sooner!

@ellette-giselle

Hey, quit jumping ahead here! lol. would it interest you to know that Julius and a Praetorian may or may not be having a little conversation right now?

Haha okay I’ll be quiet and let them have their discussion XD

@ellette-giselle

I agree with @theshadow, I would love to see more of how Marcus and Flavia’s relationship develops rather than just being told that it did. I also feel like I don’t know Flavia very well- I know you describe her when Marcus is thinking about her and talking to Caius, but I want to see it in her rather than just be told it about…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Is that bad that Thaddeus seems mature, but then there are also glimpses of him being childish, or do I need to go with one or the other? Also, are there particular times when what he says seems overly mature?

I don’t think it’s bad to show maturity and then have him resume normal childhood behavior. It just seemed like he was…[Read more]

@whalekeeper

I am finally jumping on here but I’m still sort of undecided which WIP I want to highlight… I feel like most of my WIP’s are either incomplete or I haven’t fully fleshed out the plot yet… or I’m considering turning into a series rather than one book but don’t really know yet. OK, I think I know which one I’ll do. Here we go! I…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Just a few quick notes-

-Thaddeus is ten, but sometimes he seems older (which is fine for him to be mature for his age, but sometimes it sounded like an adult talking) and sometimes he seems younger (when he is sleeping with his head in Flavia’s lap).

-A couple times when Caius is sharing the Gospel, he used more than one name…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

I do think the second chapter was a little smoother than the first! The only thing that raised questions for me was Marcus questioning Ignatius. I think you did cause Ignatius to be a bit suspicious that Marcus was sympathizing with the Christians, but I feel like all the questions he was asking would raise a little more alarm,…[Read more]

@highscribeofaetherium

It’s fine on my end…

@savannah_grace2009

Girl your suggestions were good, though! I haven’t done much research on starting off a book, so it sounds like you have more tools under your belt in that area than I do.

@savannah_grace2009

*sighs in relief* Okay because I was panicking after I posted and then you posted that you really liked the fountain scene…I felt sooo bad lol

I think we were posting over each other… like I didn’t see your comments until after I posted.

@savannah_grace2009

It did that to me the other day… where all the profile pics disappeared and then the format was all crazy. But like you said it fixed itself pretty quickly.

@ellette-giselle

Ok I love what @savannah_grace2009 just said about doing the whole colosseum scene first- that makes a lot of sense!

As far as the fountain scene, I think you could maybe still incorporate that later- maybe not the swordfighting, but perhaps during their conversation they’re sitting outside and the teasing turns into wrestling…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Just now saw your updated version- I love that fountain scene at the beginning! It made me smile because I can easily see my brothers doing that!

Julius inwardly berated himself for failing in such a simple thing.

This is just something I thought of as I was reading through- maybe instead of telling us Julius inwardly berated…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

However, if Marcus came off as too young in y’all’s opinion then I can tone him down into a more mature guy. what do y’all think?

Hmm… I do have two younger brothers who are teenagers, but maybe they’re more chill than other guys their age. They do pick on each other and get on each other’s nerves, but in the case of someo…[Read more]