TheShadow

Update
I’M DONE!!!!!!
It’s not exact, but I am proud to announce I finished around 12 hours of writing! I wrote somewhere around 9000 words, but after going through and editing sections, I was left with only about 8700 words of progress. Not as far as I hoped, but that’s still about nine days of work for me in one day!

I’m thinking about making…[Read more]

@theshadow

It’s all about why the darkness is there. Top questions when reading something dark: Is this melodramatic? If so, what does that say about the writer’s reasons for including it? What practical reason does the writer have for including it, if at all?

Tbh I see no problem with big bombs in a story, I have one in my project. It’s a magic…[Read more]

@theshadow

Ellette nailed it. I pretty much would have said the same thing (if I could articulate it that well, which I could not)

@theshadow

Ok, my essential thoughts: this is a dark world. I mean man, it’s dark, depraved, sick, evil, black, and desperate. it is ONLY because of God that there is any hope at all. I tend to write about a lot of dark stuff, i.e. persecution of the Christians in the roman times, child brainwashing in dystopian era, outlawing of Christianity,…[Read more]

@theshadow

Note: There is no description in this one of the courtyard because the description would be in the chapter before.

 
Chapter 9
Julius pulled his cloak closer. It was nearing the end of summer, and the night air had a decided chill. It would be curfew soon, and Julius would have to hurry. He slipped through the gate and began his…[Read more]

@theshadow

The last scene was sooo cute, I liked it a lot! Also Julius’ internal dialogue and conflict was good.

I’m so glad. I pride myself with pulling off good wedding scenes. Good! I’m glad Julius’ internal struggle was good!

Ignatius, if you lay a finger on Marcus, it’s not ending well for you!

are you threatening my character? Isn’t Ign…[Read more]

@theshadow

so, besides that, how was the chapter?

@trailblazer

Also, here’s the part you were jumping ahead on Trailblazer. Great minds think alike in the writing world I guess. lol.

@theshadow Note: Flavia is under developed as we discussed, and I plan on adding more about her in chapter 7

 
Chapter 8
Julius leaned his shoulder against the side of the window. He stared out into the garden below, thinking of all the days he and Marcus had spent there. They had grown up together, and had been friends from the day they met. The…[Read more]

@theshadow

Ack, I thought you would say that. I’ve been thinking also of a way to develop a bit more with her. I’m kinda distracted with the other stuff going on and thought I would drop it for now and come back. after all, this is my very rough draft. But yes, she is under developed.

@trailblazer

And lastly, this is just an idea that popped…

[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

I agree with @theshadow, I would love to see more of how Marcus and Flavia’s relationship develops rather than just being told that it did. I also feel like I don’t know Flavia very well- I know you describe her when Marcus is thinking about her and talking to Caius, but I want to see it in her rather than just be told it about…[Read more]

@rae

I’ll be praying!!! Man, you are in serious trouble…. try some chocolate.

@theshadow

Yes, please send them on the WIP!!! I can’t wait!! I’m so glad you liked it!

@theshadow

no edits or critiques for that one?

@theshadow

You have no idea how happy that makes me to know that someone is looking forward to reading more of the story!!!

@theshadow

Well, now he’s happy. I mean VERY happy. You’ll see why……..

I’m posting the chapter right now.

@theshadow

yup. editing is going well, but I had to stop and go back to writing because Marcus was sad that he was being ignored. lol.

@theshadow

Oh I’m so glad you like it!!!!! No it didn’t come off as rude, I just thought maybe there was a reason, like you had critiques you needed time to think through or something. I also pulled off a little because…. I don’t know, I guess I didn’t want anyone to feel like I was monopolizing their time. I have been told I have a gift for…[Read more]

@theshadow

Yes, should I not?

I went back and did a bunch of the edits y’all suggested and then I’m working on the next chapter. I want the book to be on the shorter side this time, but i’m trying to not rush things.

@theshadow

Welcome! Great to have you join!

Yeah, I also have to stop between 15 and 15:30 cuz we’re taking a family friend somewhere.

So, hopefully I can actually do 12 hours. I will sincerely try.

@highscribeodaetherium @grcr @theshadow I posted it ^^^

@theshadow

Thank you so much!!! haha, I’m glad you liked that. Most times I write funny things and then wait in anticipation for the reader rto laugh. They look at me and are like “what? what am I supposed to laugh about?”

More body language. That goes to the notes on the side. Thanks. Ah, more conflicting emotions. got…[Read more]