TheShadow

@grcr

I don’t see anyone else in line…. so maybe I can have another after you are done with @keilah-h ??? Pretty please!!

Just one character this time. XD

@linus-smallprint

Awesome! Shall be looking forward to comments!

@linus-smallprint

try THAT.

https://1drv.ms/w/c/9ff685038eab87a7/ET6rrEZ5XvJHv-1rHGwycOMBuh5U4QkPLaT031-tmVn-qQ?e=1Dlg54

Sector 5 The Hidden.docx

Odd.

That wasn’t a link at all.

@linus-smallprint

Uh… hmm. Idk how to add people in….

I’ll try reposting the link and if you can’t get in then I guess I’ll try to figure something out…….

Sector 5 The Hidden.docx

Try that. You may need to sign in…..

@linus-smallprint

Oooh that’s a good idea!!

And I like your ideas too…I feel like that would be really cool if we did something like that

@whalekeeper

I did not make up the minerals, they are real.

Well I’m dumb XD

Still, that’s cool though.

@whalekeeper I am impressed that your worldbuilding has gone as far as making up new minerals for the world. Did you make those up on the spot?

@elishavet-pidyon Whenever I write Dante, I definitely overuse the word “grin” too, lol. Sometimes words just stick i guess

Lois

Lois gave a simple nod. He wrote down something in his class notes, then…[Read more]

@elishavet-pidyon @whalekeeper

Lois

Lois looked down at the textbook. Corpse crystal wasn’t actually the scientific name given in the book, but, just like fool’s gold was another name for pyrite, Hugo was technically correct.

“And what are you talking about besides that, anyway?”

“Living imaginary friends and little siblings.” Lois put away t…[Read more]

@elishavet-pidyon

Yeah the challenge is still open for anyone! I have no idea when the characters will be finished if I do draw them, but I’ll try not to take very long. I’d really love to read your short story.

@elishavet-pidyon

Haha!!! I literally had nothing to do for three days in the car. I read everything in the art section, everything in the general writing section. XD

Now that I’m going back to the beginning…

This is really hard XD

because I know you’re trying to go for the “chaos” vibes of a big family as they get ready for church and the party. You set up Hallie, Easton, and the parents pretty well, especially for the fast-paced scene, but the other siblings kind of disappear throughout the book.

Maybe…[Read more]

@esther-c

To be honest, I’m not really sure.

I might have to reread it a little more and let you know XD

@elishavet-pidyon

Lois

“I’m just… worried about my sister. A bit. You met her and her friend in the library. She…” Lois shook his head. “Never mind it. There’s not really anything I can do while in class anyway.”

@rae @keilah-h

Love the new art!

@grcr

Yijun sounds like an interesting character. What kind of setting is he from? The word prince immediately makes me think medieval, but that might not be right.

(but that would be after he already got away, so does that still count as a response…? ah, questions questions)

I think of the secondary response as what they resort to if the first r…[Read more]

@esther-c

I would just like to see it set up a little more at the very beginning chapters.

I know you’re going for chaos on the Sunday morning before church, but like I mentioned before, since Easton and Hallie’s family is a big one, I think you need to focus more on their family and the dynamics. I’d love to see Hallie’s closeness with her mom…[Read more]

@whalekeeper

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!! you’re the best and I always love exchanging ideas with you <3