Brianne

@ellette-giselle

Ohhh okay that makes sense. I thought you meant that you had nothing written out XD

I did that too, with bullet points, it works lol

Can you share the plot with me then? It would really help me lol

@ellette-giselle

I love how you introduced Cassian’s character. I mean, man, I liked him from the firs paragraph.

Oops…I was going to quote you but forgot….lol

I would like to know more about the Paynes as well. Like, why are they outcast, what is the race mixing thing, etc. etc. If that gets explained later then you can just leave it and l…

[Read more]

@savannah_grace2009

Chase

She’s beautiful. Chase watched Sef with eyes of green and blue. “Y-your l-like my m-mom.” Chase caught her gaze, exploring the depths of her green eyes with large, childish eyes. Catching himself, he quickly turned away, a little color coming to his pale face.

Well, there has never been a day when I can’t write.

Girl, I wish. I go to public school and so I leave at 7:30 and don’t get back home until almost 5, and that’s without sports and plays and other things! When volleyball starts I won’t get home until like 7:30!!!!

What grade are you in? I honestly assumed you were graduated lol

Most of the tim…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

No, i don’t have anything written out. I mean, I  know what’s going to happen, but I really don’t want to say. However, if you need me to tell you for editing purposes then I will.

Okay…you need to write it out in an organized plot.

I know it’s boring and annoying, but before you write anymore, you really should start writin…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Oooooo So, so good!! I LOVE the name Cassian!! Oh man, this is so good! I can already envision this going so, so good. Oh man, I love it!

Really?? thank you so much! Honestly I get a little mad at my story sometimes because it’s not as good as I wanted it to be XD

Ok, the killing the tree thing was a little strange. Explanation…

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@jonas

I kind of have the opposite problem: my style has shifted to be a very strict 3rd-person limited POV, which means all information has to come out very naturally and it takes me way too long to explain things.

Honestly, me too lol

I think what happened is I overcorrected XD

@ellette-giselle

I was mostly asking about what happens in your story, rather than the details about why you wrote it and the theme.

It’s okay, I’m bad at explaining my stories…I end up confusing EVERYONE..

Do you have everything that happens in your story written out?

Like an outline/plot?

ALSO GIRL HOW DO YOU WRITE 20 CHAPTERS IN A…[Read more]

@jonas sorry, I was going to wait for you to post the next ones….but since @ellette-giselle wants to look at the next one, and there shouldn’t be any more after this for a while, it shouldn’t be too panic inducing…lol

Chapter 2

Found

Cassian’s bare feet flew over the verdant carpet, effortlessly leaping over sticks and stones in his pat…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

why Nico left, where is the baby from the prologue, who are the two different groups here. I know you have hinted at it a little in the prologue, but I’d still like more back story and more info. I tend to be a little more like Tolkine in writing, as in, I have a backstory for everyone, and most of the time, %60 percent of the b…

[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Is that bad that Thaddeus seems mature, but then there are also glimpses of him being childish, or do I need to go with one or the other? Also, are there particular times when what he says seems overly mature?

I don’t think it’s bad to show maturity and then have him resume normal childhood behavior. It just seemed like he was…[Read more]

@keilah-h

do you have a picture of Tenz? A drawing, faceclaim picture, anything?

You DO NOT want to see me previous drawing attempts. They were just creepy. I don’t really have anything else though…I’ll try drawing a picture that’s actually good for once.

Sorry, guys, our internet was out for a while cuz of a storm.

@highscribeofaetherium

Uh…stars, that’s weirdly stated. Sorry, it basically means the triangle scale is at an angle.

@ellette-giselle

Yeah. He may or may not have a slightly longer torso than average. Since I haven’t made that official yet, I omitted it from description.

@whalekeeper

I am finally jumping on here but I’m still sort of undecided which WIP I want to highlight… I feel like most of my WIP’s are either incomplete or I haven’t fully fleshed out the plot yet… or I’m considering turning into a series rather than one book but don’t really know yet. OK, I think I know which one I’ll do. Here we go! I…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Just a few quick notes-

-Thaddeus is ten, but sometimes he seems older (which is fine for him to be mature for his age, but sometimes it sounded like an adult talking) and sometimes he seems younger (when he is sleeping with his head in Flavia’s lap).

-A couple times when Caius is sharing the Gospel, he used more than one name…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

I do have one question.

What is the plot of your story (feel free to share spoilers, I don’t mind)?

How long is your novel going to be?

I have one more chapter after this one that is ready for critiques, and then I have to continue working on revisions until it’s ready for more detailed critiques.

@ellette-giselle

Yes, I do!  (I have about 36K words) However, I’m in the middle of a big  revision, so the chapters won’t really make sense. Though I do have the next chapter that I *think* should be done.

Chapter 1

Strong hands grabbed her shoulders, trying to rip her away.

But Sef wouldn’t let go.

Eyes scrunched shut, tears leaking fro…[Read more]

What outer plot is your protagonist/s dealing with?

*casually looks up what an outer plot is* I really need to learn more writing terms!! 😬😬😬

If you were plopped into your project’s universe, would the characters love you or hate you? Why?

I honestly don’t know! They probably wouldn’t even notice me…I tend to think of myself as annoying X…[Read more]

@ellette-giselle

Yeah, maybe take Puddleglum *clears throat* I mean, that other writing coach, with a grain of salt. Scratch that, maybe a pillar of salt. lol.

🤣

 However, I will say that there is something to be learned from everyone. So, try to see the gold in the sand on what he’s saying. It might be something about dialogue, or description, or…

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