Michael Stanton

@That_Writer_Girl_99 ooooohhhhhh boyyyyyy… *grins monstrously**chuckles evilly* You have no idea what you just set in motion. I just took a whole long beautiful course that this wonderful place of Kingdom Pen put together on mastering theme and you ask me for help—!!! YESSSSSS!! Bliss!!! *closes eyes**sighs happily*

Tell you what. Give me…[Read more]

@f5a8c3e92 yes, much better. They pretty much already caught everything that needed help, I think.
Weaving the dream thing in was a great idea. Made it a lot more intriguing and set up the premise quite nicely. 😉

@That_Writer_Girl_99 um… Kara? *scrunches her eyes up* Shortish light brown hair… plain face that could be pretty if she smiled… (like most faces. 😀 ) fairly big eyes that are probably somewhere between blue and grey… almost blunt nose… probably fairly large-boned when it comes to build, but not particularly big. She looks bookish to…[Read more]

@That_Writer_Girl_99 yeah. What he said. XD

@That_Writer_Girl_99 ooooohhhh… you know what? It looks like you’ve got really good potential here for a disillusionment story. I really, really love the idea of the world outside being even worse than the prison.
What do you know about theme/message and building your story around it?
Because if you do have the world outside be worse than the…[Read more]

@That_Writer_Girl_99 no, I know. It isn’t. 😛 Have you come up with any ideas so far? Need help brainstorming? Seriously, just dump them all right here and I’ll help you pick through them if I can. That’s what we do here. We’re all writers after all… 😉 Even if you think the ideas are dumb, please— share them. I have dumb ideas all the time.…[Read more]

@That_Writer_Girl_99

Wow.
Okay, first of all, may I just say congratulations on the very strong character voice. Most people go for the snazzy voices of characters like Tam to carry their story if it’s first person, but I love the subtle yet very distinct tone of Kara’s. It’s beautiful.

In fact, your prose itself is actually very strong, and I…[Read more]

@That_Writer_Girl_99 I totally get that. You’ll be fine. I promise. 😉 Tag me when you do post and I’ll get back to you with opinions as soon as I’ve done a thorough read through. 🙂

@That_Writer_Girl_99 ha. XD Not at all…

@That_Writer_Girl_99 *salutes* reporting for duty! And really, we’re not monsters. 😀 Just start a new topic over in General Writing Discussions or something and we’ll have a nice little critiquing party with cake and brownies and punch for everyone. 😀 (Virtual, of course. *wink*)

@moriahs Oh, nice. I read Bond’s Crown and Covenant Trilogy, Betrayal, and a couple others when I was still in high school and remember enjoying each of them. Great historical fiction there.

@Daeus yessir. I stopped doing this wonderful thing once I approached (aka got within ten chapters of :’D) the climax and started really having to rethink you-know-who. My typical writing night was too messy to have too much competition or I would have imploded from the double pressure. 😛 Once I get past the chapter I’m on (wherein about eight…[Read more]

@f5a8c3e92 YES. Much better. *thumbs up* Notice how the details ground you.
And I think it would be really cool for that to be part of Maya’s dream. Go for it. 😀

@jenali That’s awesome to hear that the lesson was able to help you get over that fear! I do think that explicitly-Christian fiction can be harder than writing non-explicitly Christian fiction (because you now have a second element of what it means to live as a Christian), but I think it’s definitely a challenge that can be conquered with…[Read more]

@jenali Good combo. Acceptance is a unique theme to have. What would you say the focusing question is for that theme?
The story actually sounds a bit more like Method #2 to me, since the major and minor themes are providing part of the answer to the primary theme of leadership. Unless I’m misunderstanding what you’re saying?

@jenali That sounds great! Doing foils with a theme of friendship can be especially interesting because then the two characters’ foil relationship with each other becomes an aspect of the actual theme (friendship), and the reader can see how both characters treat the same friendship differently. Good choice.

@jenali Good. I would generally agree with you that writers who struggle with theme don’t often have more than one theme. I like the way that your two examples parallel each other (one being the third method done well; one the third method done poorly). Contrasting similar situations of stories that work and stories that don’t work can be a great…[Read more]

@ethryndal Liriel’s guilt in the reaction to scene #1 is unclear to me. If she didn’t care about his life in battle, why after battle does she begin to care? Are there any events that happen between those that send her on that path? Or is it the realization that he could be dead that makes her re-think her decision?

Scene #2 looks good to me.…[Read more]

@ethrynal Haha, got it. As long as you’re clear on what those events are, that should be good. 🙂

@Christi-Eaton thanks. 😉