Cloaked Mystery

@koshka @loopylin

Rax and Ben

Rax laughed, he enjoyed the conversation between an ignorant fish person and two twins who barely agreed on anything. Ben was also enjoying the conversation from the background.

Rax spoke up, “Syph, how about you just watch this time around.”

@koshka

Mexican explosive addict who is an undead skeleton kind of trouble

Can I cause trouble with a new charrie? Pleeeeaase

@esther-c

Sorry I’m just now getting to this!!!!

My main critique would be that you spend a lot of time on dialogue. I kind of feel like we just got thrown into the story and all we know about the characters is because of what they say. Maybe breaking up some dialogue and really showing us who they characters are would help…it kind of feels l…[Read more]

@loopylin @koshka

Rax and Ben

Rax was excited when he heard Eddie’s response. “Great! Wonderful!” You could never see a smile as big on anyone’s face as on Rax’s. He was filled with joy, for he liked dancing, even though he had only danced formally once or twice, but that made him more excited that he would dance formally again. And to top it…[Read more]

@whalekeeper

I wrote it seriously, but looking back at it it’s kinda funny, lol. I’m glad you found it funny

@koshka

By the way, Syph has no problem dancing with girls. He just is trying to understand how it would work if you weren’t in competition.

Syph is so funny, lol

@the_lost-journal

tbh, I am also confused about the teachings  XD And I do wonder why. But also I get this feeling of fullness after going to confession. So whatever it is, I think I am going to stick to it! Also  thanks for the prayers. I won’t be able to get back to anyone for a while btw. I AM GOING SKIING! ^o^

I agree, it does help to tell oth…[Read more]

@loppylin @anyoneelse

Also, I don’t think I remember what your characters look like either?

Here’s a pre-written description of Rax:

Rax was a tall, tan skinned man. His eyes were light blue, filled with emotion. He had long grey hair often tied into a manbun. His clothes were baggy, pants and shirt, but he wore no shoes. On his arms were t…

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I like fire, so I have a MC who is a pyromancer :}

*blinks a couple of times* … *blinks a couple more times*

I had to go so far to try and find the last Sypher and Twins RPs XD. I guess that’s what I get for not being on for almost a week (I should probably read up on what Alpha and Dante are doing since there seems to be a lot of noise coming from over there… 👀👀👀)

@loopylin @koshka

Rax and…[Read more]

@rae

Should I put a picture of Emmie in Alpha’s pocket or would that be too mean?

DO IT!!! Alpha would be so mad XD

Tip for everyone: learn how to fight, this will make writing fight scenes much better (sorry Ruth, that might be very helpful for you)

@the_lost-journal

Sorry for not responding sooner, I was on a missionary trip to our sister church in Uganda.

What are your thoughts on catholic reconciliation?

I am not against the idea, I actually support it in a sense. Though, I think it should not just be isolated to your priest/pastor. but to trustworthy friends and family as well. Talk…[Read more]

@whalekeeper

okay hahahaha sounds good lol

@ellette-giselle

If Nar is his sister, he’s going to be furious that his new enemy is carrying around pictures of his sister. If Nar is a crush then he’s going to be really mad because it doesn’t seem like he would want everyone in kingdom come to know that he carries around her picture.

Nar is his sister, and he is very protective of her.…[Read more]

@whalekeeper

no I haven’t!!!

Doesn’t everyone have at least a fragment of virtue though? (Sorry, I don’t mean to shut down everything you’re saying, this is just my thoughts. 😅) I’m not saying they have to be someone that the readers will look up to and be like, “Oh my word I want to be just like them.” I understand mankind is sinful and there probably are people out there t…

[Read more]

@esther-c

Now, you mentioned your characters not knowing God. And I liked how you put that—“without God there is no hope.” But…you have to think that these characters are probably looking for hope, right? Even just an occasional thought of wishing there was a way out of this darkness they’re living in.

So I know with where they’re at right now,…

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@ellette-giselle

Ha! Took me a second to figure out where this is going……. I’ll be surprised if they’re both still alive and out of jail by the end of the day.

Lol

You kidding me? The police have already tried to take Alpha (when he stabbed Jep and Chase went to the hospital) and well, Alpha hasn’t stepped foot in the station yet.