hybridlore

@whalekeeper

The greatest enjoyment I got from the prologue was the twist from ‘we’re doing this to save the baby’ to ‘what’s this baby doing here?’ That was great.

Really?!?! That’s awesome…I guess I’m keeping it now XD XD

You should think about how strong of an allegory you want. Once you say Jesus, all readers will know this is a Christian a…

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@jonas

Wow…this is a lot to think about and really helpful! Thank you!!

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it as it is, it really evokes a certain mood, and has really strong imagery.

Okay good XD

Yeah, the first line of the book is always the hardest because that’s how the readers decide whether or not to keep reading!

These three par…

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@anybody

Challenge ideas: (plz help me add to this list)

1. Write as many words as you can in one hour.
2. Write a short story a day for one week
3. Try to write a short story/snippet in the style of your favorite author(s)
4. Try to edit double the number of chapters you usually do in one day.

Update
I’M DONE!!!!!!
It’s not exact, but I am proud to announce I finished around 12 hours of writing! I wrote somewhere around 9000 words, but after going through and editing sections, I was left with only about 8700 words of progress. Not as far as I hoped, but that’s still about nine days of work for me in one day!

I’m thinking about making…[Read more]

@theshadow

It’s all about why the darkness is there. Top questions when reading something dark: Is this melodramatic? If so, what does that say about the writer’s reasons for including it? What practical reason does the writer have for including it, if at all?

Tbh I see no problem with big bombs in a story, I have one in my project. It’s a magic…[Read more]

@theshadow

Ellette nailed it. I pretty much would have said the same thing (if I could articulate it that well, which I could not)

@loopylin

Ooh, I love those ones.

@theshadow

Ok, my essential thoughts: this is a dark world. I mean man, it’s dark, depraved, sick, evil, black, and desperate. it is ONLY because of God that there is any hope at all. I tend to write about a lot of dark stuff, i.e. persecution of the Christians in the roman times, child brainwashing in dystopian era, outlawing of Christianity,…[Read more]

@highscribeofaetherium Oh I haven’t heard that one p. I’ll have to listen to it later.
Umm I really like Hey, Runner!, Envy Green, and Blue Eyed Girl

@whalekeeper Nice pfp :]

Teleportation was the only part of Seb’s powers I felt like I understood, lol. What did he just do to Caly’s characters? I’m not sure I completely followed.

Lois 

He hesitated, fiddling with a pencil in one hand.

“…Sure,” he said finally.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. After art class is done?”

“Sounds good.”

“Thanks, Marce…[Read more]

@loopylin

*agonizes over question*

Mmm… I think it’s Big Sky, MT for me, but there are so many great ones it’s really hard to pick. I’ve never heard one of their songs I didn’t love. How about yours?

Aaand chapter ten. Now i gotta go! Enjoy!

 
Chapter 10
“God take my life
I offer myself to you now
And I shall everyday
Cherish your name

God, you use my hands
To help the people
And you use my feet
So that I may bring your words
God, you use my voice
So that I may praise you all the time
And you use my mouth
So that I may tell your words

You…[Read more]

@highscribeofaetherium Yes! I love their music! Do you have a favorite song?

I want to help a little bit more since you appreciated my help before! 😋 So I mostly had the same thoughts as Jonas. The greatest enjoyment I got from the prologue was the twist from ‘we’re doing this to save the baby’ to ‘what’s this baby doing here?’ That was great.

I only have a couple extra notes.

Please, Jesus, save my son, he begged, ref…

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@savannah_grace2009

Aww that’s so sweet of you! 🥰 I’m honored to be called out in the acknowledgements, thank you so much!!

@theshadow

Note: There is no description in this one of the courtyard because the description would be in the chapter before.

 
Chapter 9
Julius pulled his cloak closer. It was nearing the end of summer, and the night air had a decided chill. It would be curfew soon, and Julius would have to hurry. He slipped through the gate and began his…[Read more]

@theshadow

The last scene was sooo cute, I liked it a lot! Also Julius’ internal dialogue and conflict was good.

I’m so glad. I pride myself with pulling off good wedding scenes. Good! I’m glad Julius’ internal struggle was good!

Ignatius, if you lay a finger on Marcus, it’s not ending well for you!

are you threatening my character? Isn’t Ign…[Read more]

Goodness! Cloaked Mystery is ON IT! It helps that there is more background to work off of knowing the other version of the story, but man! This is like professional editing! AWESOME JOB!