Hannah Whatley

@kate-flournoy I’ll try to stop in soon, in which case I’ll probably go later. I may also have to leave abruptly at any time, so I don’t know how this is gonna go.

@Daeus @Dragon-Snapper I’m writing… join in. How far do you guys wanna go? I’m going till 9:45, but don’t feel obligated.

About starting off with the theme thing, I mean.

Yeah. That.

Obviously I can’t take credit for you being an all around awesome person.

@Emma-Flournoy *beams proudly* I have taught you well, my young apprentice.

XD

@Daeus what, the one that goes ‘The songs of the dead are the lamentations of the living’ one? I’m not sure I remembered that right, but it was the best I could do on short notice… 😛

@Dragon-Snapper what they said— questions. Not necessarily something gaudy or high-tension— just questions.

@dragon-snapper, I’m no expert when it comes to first sentences, but I know a good one when I see it. It’s a good thing the theme of the month for January is exactly this topic. I have a good feeling my fellow writing team members will have some articles just for this.

My favorite first sentence so far has to be from The Rise and Fall of Mount…[Read more]

@dragon-snapper Aha, but not anymore.

@dragon-snapper This isn’t my strength either, but getting the reader to ask a question is definitely a good idea. A lot of the time, writing instructors will tell you to start things off with a bang, but I’m not so sure about that. For myself, I’m neutral about bangs. I like the bang, but in other ways it seems just a little pushy and most of all…[Read more]

I only see one

@HowlingWolf Actually, we just had a thread about that recently. Hopefully you’ll find it helpful. https://kingdompen.org/forums/topic/little-peoples/

Hi Kenya! Yep. What the others said. The story concept is great, it’s just a question of how you’ll handle it.

@emma-flournoy Ok, how about this?

Matthew is sworn to avenge a murder. His dedication to his wronged family could bring him through any trial, but his youth and inexperience hold him back. Setting out to find new strength, he plummets into a tangled mess of desperate plots, tragedies, and the vague shrouds surrounding his destiny from a dying…[Read more]

@howlingwolf I concur with what @kate-flournoy said. I really do think this has potential.
Good luck with it 🙂

Heyyyy! Kenya! Nice to see you again! 😀
I think the story could have a lot of potential, but you’d need to think up a plot that would actually keep the story moving and make so many different children and families necessary. It doesn’t have to be complicated— it could be as simple as some bad-guy scientist trying to get them back, and their…[Read more]

@howlingwolf Hello, I don’t believe we have met before, I’m Christine, but you can call me Christi. I am one of the writing team interns here at KP. 🙂

Now, this is an interesting idea you have here, and it could be a cool premise, but it would need a lot of work as far as fleshing out the plot, characters, etc. It really depends on what your…[Read more]

Ok, let’s try this again.

“Matthew is sworn to avenge a murder. His dedication to his wronged family could bring him through any trial, but his youth and inexperience hold him back. Setting out to find new strength, he plummets into a tangled mess of desperate plots, tragedies, and the vague shrouds surrounding his destiny from a dying mentor’s v…[Read more]

@emma-flournoy, Yeah, it’s pretty strange, I’m definitely not ISTJ. But aside from my introvertedness, I am pretty much fully ESTJ 🙂 (especially when I am doing something I really enjoy.)

@i-j-anderson, you probably would enjoy this conversation. 😉

@Daeus yes, I love it. I obviously know the story, which may or may not mess up my perspective, but it’s strong to me and makes me want to pick it up and read it… lots of questions.

Alright. Hopefully we’re good now. Can you find any way to improve it? Does it attract you? (why or why not?)

@leumeister @emma-flournoy @hope @kate-flournoy @perfectfifths @faithdk @jess @his-instrument @writefury @gretald @ingridrd @sarah-h @the-bean @mark-kamibaya @warrioroftherealm @hannah-c @ivy-rose @ethryndal @dragon-snapper @anne-swiftbla…[Read more]

@Daeus yes! Much better. The only thing that’s a little off is this sentence:

Setting out to find new strength, he plummets into struggles for survival, desperate plots, uncertainties, and the vague shadow surrounding his destiny from a dying mentor’s vision.

I think it’s just the ‘into struggles for survival’ part— maybe I’m being picky, b…[Read more]