WIP: Let There Be Light, Book 1 of The Flames of Hope Trilogy

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  • #184261
    calyhuge
    @calyhuge
      • Rank: Wise Jester
      • Total Posts: 71

      @ellette-giselle @whalekeeper

      Reply coming in the Characters of the Opposite Gender forum

      I ❤️ Debating Theology
      I ❤️ Family Heritage
      I ❤️ Medievals

      #184267
      calyhuge
      @calyhuge
        • Rank: Wise Jester
        • Total Posts: 71

        @ellette-giselle

        Ok I read the scene. And the first thing I think is “I’ve never been in a war – I can’t imagine what that’s like.”

        I will tell you it feels like it’s a real guy, and it feels like real war, and I think what you had him do so far is what a guy would do. Now we come to what comes next, and to me, the first question is, How strong is his faith? Does he accept God works all things for good? Does he know God pre-ordained everything, and His purpose always stands? Does he recognize that Satan wants to destroy his faith by throwing him into despair? Does he know Satan can never take a soul once God has it? But most importantly: Does he remember heaven is the final destination?  The question of how he reacts is, I think, not a question of gender, but a question of theology. Now, I’m a Calvinist, so perhaps you don’t agree with some of the previous theological questions, but in my opinion (which matters to exactly no one) is that Calvinism offers the most assurance of any Christian outlook.

        Other reactions: It sounds like a battle between the Protestants and Catholics. Perhaps look up William of Orange (there were a few, make sure it’s the one drove off the Spaniards around the same time as the Canons of Dort [side note: that’s when the five points of Calvinism were come up with😀])

        Also, I only have read that scene, so I have no idea what the overall story is, so season my advice with that salt, if you please.

        I have, however, been writing a lot of death scenes, battle scenes, etc. and here’s my outlook: heaven comes next for believers. This is so important to me that I have some scenes actually set in the next life (they observe the proceedings of the world from heaven through the metaphor of a theater, if that makes sense). There really is no way for Aaron admit that the death of his friends is a good thing without remembering a) to live is Christ and b) to die is gain.

        Of course his thoughts may turn suicidal, in which he must remember more clearly the “a” aforementioned, while remembering the “b” when considering the death of his friends.

        I’m sorry this is a lot, but I hope it’s helpful!

        I ❤️ Debating Theology
        I ❤️ Family Heritage
        I ❤️ Medievals

        #184270
        Otherworldly Historian
        @otherworldlyhistorian
          • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
          • Total Posts: 229

          @ellette-giselle

          I agree with most of what @calyhuge has already said in regards to Aaron.

          My main advise is to just follow his current character design and/or think about how dudes in your own life would approach the situation.

          I feel like from my experience and what you’ve provided than if Aaron chooses to go down the greif hole might eventually develop like survivors guilt. He will probably try to hide his feelings but every so often find himself crying to himself in a corner or being really depressed ish.

          I feel like at some point bringing in another character to become Aaron’s friend and help him out of his greif would probably be the best solution. There would need to be some reason they bond (maybe similar situations or they both like playing chess or possibly even they are both stuck working a terrible job cleaning pig styes. It could really be anything). Eventually Aaron would probably open up after getting to know the oyher guy well enough.

          Hope my tangent helps (sorry if it is irrelevant).

          Through darkness,
          light shines brightest

          #184287
          Ellette Giselle
          @ellette-giselle
            • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
            • Total Posts: 1093

            @calyhuge @otherworldlyhistorian

             

            Oh wow, this is so helpful! Thanks so much!

            (I’m curious what scene y’all read. The full battle scene, or the aftermath one? Or both?)

            I will tell you it feels like it’s a real guy, and it feels like real war, and I think what you had him do so far is what a guy would do

            That’s a relief! Just getting you to say that is a mile marker for me!!

            Does he accept God works all things for good? Does he know God pre-ordained everything, and His purpose always stands? Does he recognize that Satan wants to destroy his faith by throwing him into despair? Does he know Satan can never take a soul once God has it? But most importantly: Does he remember heaven is the final destination?

            All the answers to these questions is yes. However, I don’t know about you, but when I’m going through a rough situation I find it very easy to lose sight of these truths. It is often the easiest thing in the world to blame God for something that happened, and I think the Devil has a good part in making it seem so. It’s also very easy to doubt. I mean, when it’s all bright and shiny we have an easy time believing. Now that Aaron’s faith has been put to the test he is discovering just how much it can possibly take. That is a really rough feeling. Of course, I have never gone through something like he has, but I’ve had a taste, and I’ve had a few “dark night of the soul” (albeit mini ones). So, long answer short, Aaron knows and believes all of this, but now that faith is getting a good testing and he’s not enjoying it.

             

            It sounds like a battle between the Protestants and Catholics. Perhaps look up William of Orange (there were a few, make sure it’s the one drove off the Spaniards around the same time as the Canons of Dort [side note: that’s when the five points of Calvinism were come up with😀])

            I love studying those wars! I have read tones of books about them too. Saint Bartholomew’s Eve by GA Henty, Baptized by Fire, The Escape and The Mission, Not Regina etc. etc. Now I’m getting side-tracked. lol. The funny thing is, the Empire is completely pagan. Like Romanic culture pagan. They have badness written all over them. And now Aaron is technically their prisoner, and he is working against the to spread the gospel……….. and that’s enough spoilers.

             

            heaven comes next for believers. This is so important to me that I have some scenes actually set in the next life (they observe the proceedings of the world from heaven through the metaphor of a theater, if that makes sense). There really is no way for Aaron admit that the death of his friends is a good thing without remembering a) to live is Christ and b) to die is gain.

            YES! Believer death scenes can be THE MOST BEAUTIFUL scenes in books! There can be pain and grief, but the most beautiful faith and peace as well. I have never done any heaven scenes….. I can’t say I ever felt comfortable writing them, lol. But yes, I 100% agree. Aaron would too, but it’s hard to remember all that in the moment while you’re holding a dying friend in the worst possible situation imaginable.

            Of course his thoughts may turn suicidal

            Haha, nope. No suicide thoughts around here. Honestly, it didn’t really go with the culture back then. Taking your life was kinda unheard of. I think they had a higher value on life because guys who lived to their fifties were the “wise old men” of the time.

            My main advise is to just follow his current character design and/or think about how dudes in your own life would approach the situation

            There aren’t a tone of dudes in my life, lol. The ones that are around are pretty reserved when I’m there, so it’s hard to pull out their personality when they all act the same around me. (It’s a bit of an odd situation. I’m the only single girl of marrying age left, and there are several guys my age and a little older, and there may or may not be an unspoken feeling of pressure because all the rest of the girls and guys married within the church, and it’s kinda expected. Even though none of us would go well together. lol) So. Yeah. With that bit of awkwardness around, it’s a little hard to ask questions like this. lol.

            I feel like from my experience and what you’ve provided than if Aaron chooses to go down the greif hole might eventually develop like survivors guilt. He will probably try to hide his feelings but every so often find himself crying to himself in a corner or being really depressed ish.

            That sounds JUST like something he would do. Thanks!

            I feel like at some point bringing in another character to become Aaron’s friend and help him out of his grief would probably be the best solution.

            Yes, I had planned on that. I’m glad to see it’s a good idea.

             

            Thank you both so much, this was super helpful!

             

             

            Riker dropped his voice to a soft whisper. “…I’m home.”

            #184291
            Ellette Giselle
            @ellette-giselle
              • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
              • Total Posts: 1093

              @keilah-h @theshadow @whalekeeper

              k, here’s a new part.


              @calyhuge
              @otherworldlyhistorian @thearcaneaxiom @linus-smallprint

              Apologies for tagging y’all. Hope you don’t mind. I’ve started employing the advice y’all gave me, and I wanted to see what you fella’s think before I go any farther with it. Does Aaron still seem like a guy. I mean, would y’all feel like a man could react this way, or is it too feminine. I know everyone deals with stuff differently, as y’all have said, but there is a difference between guys and girls. Basically, does it make you cringe and think “now way is this realistic” when you read it?

              Aaron walked slowly back to the city carrying Joseph, who was sobbing against his shoulder. The Imperial Lieutenant ordered everyone to remain in their homes and not to leave without permission. No one was allowed to leave except to get food at a certain hour in the market. The wounded were cared for in their homes or the building’s where their families stayed. Throughout the whole city, Ardantin Christians united in prayer, asking God to deliver them, or else give them strength and guidance.

              Aaron, however, was fighting his own battle. Every night he woke in a cold sweat, nightmares destroying the little sleep he got. During the day he helped care for the wounded and prayed with the people. However, as the days slowly dragged passed, Aaron began drawing further into himself. Soon, the questions he had so loved became something to dread. When he saw someone coming toward him, he would hurriedly turn and busy himself with something important. He couldn’t stand the thought of injuring their faith because he couldn’t answer simple questions when they needed answers the most.

              Aaron began to feel trapped. Everywhere he looked, men, women, and children were watching him, waiting for him to lead them. Aaron was not Turin. His friend had been a strong leader and knew the right moment to encourage and the right moment to scold. The perfect time to shout, and the perfect time for a quiet word. Aaron did not have this skill. How was he supposed to lead them, when he felt as though he was standing at the edge of a cliff on a windy day. One wrong move, one extra strong gust of wind, and he would go over. Whoever was trusting him to lead wold go down with him. Aaron couldn’t bare that weight. If it hadn’t of been for the curfew, he might seriously have run to some quiet place where no one could find him. As it was, he was trapped.

              One evening, Aaron couldn’t stand to be inside a moment longer. There were several girls crying in the kitchen, and quite a few men looking ready to hit something. Aaron could feel the inevitable questions coming, but he had no answers, and he couldn’t bring himself to tell them that. So, he fled.

              Escaping outside, Aaron crept up onto the roof. He sat down and pulled his knees to his chest. Alone, he felt free to let his grief show, and he cried silently for a few moments, morning all he had lost, and all that might have been. After an hour of sitting there alone, Aaron went back inside. However, the calm and peace of the roof called to him, and he returned every evening. It was on this rooftop that years of battles would be fought. Not physical battle’s, but spiritual ones. It was here that tears of both sorrow and joy would be shed. This rooftop would see the greatest moments of despair, and the most beautiful moments of joy.

              At first, Aaron came onto the roof to sit alone and get a breath of fresh air and a moment of peace. As the days passed, this became the place where he waged war. As things stood, Aaron was slowly losing his fight. “I don’t understand,” he whispered one night. “Why did you save Israel in the days of Hezekiah, yet you gave us into the hands of the Empire? Are we not your people just as much as they were?” It was these and many other questions that Aaron cried out into the silent night.

              Silence.

              That was the worst thing for Aaron. If only God had yelled at him and berated him for his doubt or condemned his lack of faith, it would be better. At least he would know God was actually listening. Instead, all Aaron got was silence, and all he felt was a cold darkness that threatened to strangle the last of his faith.

              One night, on his knees, Aaron looked up at the sky. “I used to feel You, but I can’t anymore. When I was home, I could feel Your presence. It was like having a friend at my side. When I came to Ardenta, You were there, and I felt You at my back, guarding me and protecting me. Now, I can’t find You! Everything is dark and I’m drowning in this place. I can’t find the light. I can’t find You!”

              Tears threatened but Aaron forced them away. He stared upward, silently pleading for an answer. The sky was strewn with millions of stars, but all Aaron could see was the blackness where they were absent.

              Aaron covered his face with his hands, his elbows resting against the rooftop. “Oh God, I don’t know what to do. There are people down there looking up to me. They need me to give them something to hope in, something to believe in. they look to me to lead them, but I can’t! I can’t help them because I’m just as lost and confused as they are. I don’t understand what I’ve done wrong. How could I have known You for so many years, yet now I face the same doubt that these people do when they have only known You for a few months? What is wrong with me?” Aaron clenched his hands into fists, and when the tears came again, he did not wipe them away. “Oh God, why me? Why did you chose me? Why did You ever send me here? Didn’t You know I would fail You? Why didn’t You send my father? Why didn’t You send one of the king’s officers who might have helped these people fight? Why me? Why pick someone so weak and so useless?” Aaron sucked in a shuddering breath. “Why did you take Turin and Prince Edwin and then leave these people with me? I can’t do anything for them! Why me?”

              Aaron stared up at the dark sky, but once again, his only answer was silence.

              Riker dropped his voice to a soft whisper. “…I’m home.”

              #184294
              Linus Smallprint
              @linus-smallprint
                • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                • Total Posts: 401

                @ellette-giselle

                This is a realistic reaction from Aaron. He sees himself as a failure and has suddenly had more responsibility shoved on to him than he thought he would get. He does not feel ready and hides, lest he bring down others with him. My character, Alan, will eventually go through something like this, asking the same question (“Why me?”) when faced with trials and feeling weak when he is called to be a leader.

                Are you feeling a little more confident in writing Aaron’s character now?

                #184295
                Ellette Giselle
                @ellette-giselle
                  • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                  • Total Posts: 1093

                  @linus-smallprint

                   

                  This is a realistic reaction from Aaron. He sees himself as a failure and has suddenly had more responsibility shoved on to him than he thought he would get. He does not feel ready and hides, lest he bring down others with him.

                  Yes! And, (spoiler kinda) he’s unintentionally beginning to see himself as Ardenta’s savior which is why he feels like a failure. I don’t know if that was clear in the above.

                   

                   

                  Are you feeling a little more confident in writing Aaron’s character now?

                  Lol. Yes. I am. Thank you so much for all your help.

                   

                  Riker dropped his voice to a soft whisper. “…I’m home.”

                  #184296
                  Linus Smallprint
                  @linus-smallprint
                    • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                    • Total Posts: 401

                    @ellette-giselle

                    Yes! And, (spoiler kinda) he’s unintentionally beginning to see himself as Ardenta’s savior which is why he feels like a failure. I don’t know if that was clear in the above.

                    Interesting. How easy it is to get caught up in pride.

                    #184297
                    Ellette Giselle
                    @ellette-giselle
                      • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                      • Total Posts: 1093

                      @linus-smallprint

                      Yup. Sure is, and the funny thing is, if you told him he was being prideful he’d look at you like you were crazy. He thinks that he’s a failure at the moment, and he’s not realizing that this stems from his pride.

                      Riker dropped his voice to a soft whisper. “…I’m home.”

                      #184298
                      Keilah H.
                      @keilah-h
                        • Rank: Chosen One
                        • Total Posts: 4732

                        @ellette-giselle ooh wow! Super sad, but still a great job showing the harsh reality of death in war, especially on the losing side.

                        Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.

                        #184299
                        Keilah H.
                        @keilah-h
                          • Rank: Chosen One
                          • Total Posts: 4732

                          also great moodboards!

                          And the “feeling like he’s a failure, stemming from pride” actually makes a weird amount of sense.

                          Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.

                          #184301
                          Ellette Giselle
                          @ellette-giselle
                            • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                            • Total Posts: 1093

                            @keilah-h

                            I’m glad you liked it! Yeah, it is sad. Poor Edwin. and poor Turin of course. Poor Sabina too!

                            And the “feeling like he’s a failure, stemming from pride” actually makes a weird amount of sense.

                            I know right?

                             

                             

                             

                            Riker dropped his voice to a soft whisper. “…I’m home.”

                            #184314
                            Ellette Giselle
                            @ellette-giselle
                              • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                              • Total Posts: 1093

                              @keilah-h @theshadow @whalekeeper @linus-smallprint

                              here we go. Again, love feedback on Aaron here. I’m feeling pretty confidant, so it might all come crashing down. XD

                              The next evening found Aaron on his knees again. He found he was spending a lot of time that way, and he wasn’t finding any peace. Every night he cried out questions, and never once was there an answer.

                              This evening, Aaron felt as though he had hit a rock wall. There was no way he could push forward, but going back wasn’t an option either. Finally he exclaimed, “Lord, just give me answer. I don’t care what that answer is. Even if it’s that you have abandoned us. Just stop ignoring me! Please!”

                              “Aaron, is that you?”

                              Aaron spun and saw Noah stepping out onto the roof. He smiled at Aaron. “I’ve been wondering where you go when you disappear.”

                              Aaron turned away. He heard Noah sit down beside him, but he refused to face the young man. They were silent for a time. Then, Noah spoke. “It’s hard, isn’t it.”

                              “What is?” asked Aaron.

                              “To trust God when things go so wrong.”

                              Aaron said nothing.

                              “You’re struggling, I can see it.”

                              “You don’t know everything about me, Noah,” retorted Aaron.

                              Noah chuckled softly. “Some things are plane as day.”

                              “I was there, Noah.”

                              “You were where?”

                              Aaron clenched his fists tightly. “I was there when he died.”

                              Noah turned to face him. “Wait, when who died?”

                              “Turin.”

                              There was a long silence, and then Aaron pressed on. “I watched him die, Noah. I knelt by his side and I couldn’t do anything as he bled to death in the street.”

                              “Why didn’t you tell one of us?” asked Noah.

                              “Because, Noah, I’m furious,” retorted Aaron. “I’m so angry! God is who He says He is, we both know that. He’s the first and the last, He is all powerful, all knowing–– He can do anything. How could He let something like this–––”

                              “Aaron, wait!” exclaimed Noah. “That’s not the right way to––”

                              “How could He let this happen?” yelled Aaron. “How could He let this happen to Ardenta? To Turin? To Edwin? To me?”

                              Noah just looked at him, and Aaron turned away in frustration. “No answers. No one has answers!” he yelled.

                              “You’re not exempt Aaron. None of us are,” Noah said, quietly. “In this world there will still be pain and death. Hearts will still break, grief will still tare us apart. But, He is with us. He has made a way for us to a home where this will all finally come to an end! To live is Christ, to die is gain, right?”

                              Aaron rounded on his friend. “I gave up everything for him, Noah. Everything. I lost my home, my freedom, my family–– it’s all gone!”

                              “That does not mean your life will now be perfect,” replied Noah. “In fact, Christ said the complete opposite.”

                              “I don’t want to talk about this anymore,” cut in Aaron.

                              “Aaron, all of this would have happened to us if you had never come. It’s because of your obedience that we have hope, and a God to turn to.”

                              “He could have prevented all of this, and He didn’t,” replied Aaron.

                              “Aaron, God has called you to have faith in Him,” Noah said.

                              “Faith!” laughed Aaron. “Faith isn’t my problem! Didn’t you hear me? I gave up everything for Him!”

                              “You told us why God puts us through trails, Aaron. Do you remember what you said?” asked Noah.

                              “I don’t know!” yelled Aaron.

                              “You said that God’s Word tells us the testing of our faith produces steadfastness, and it will make us perfect and complete. Do you remember the story of Peter on the water?”

                              “Of course I do,” retorted Aaron. “I told it to you!”

                              Noah leaned forward. “He was standing out on the ocean, in the middle of a storm, and Jesus said, keep your eyes on Me.”

                              Aaron looked away.

                              Noah reached out a grabbed his shoulder. “Aaron, I know it’s hard. Believe me, I know it. I feel the same pain and grief you are going through. I too wonder why––”

                              “That’s just it!” interrupted Aaron. “It’s all very well for you to face doubt, but I have to lead the people. They are looking to me, Noah. The need me to show them the way, to lead them and to give them strength. How am I supposed to do that if I face the same doubt they do?”

                              Noah looked at Aaron for a long moment. Then, he spoke. “I think what you just said is the root of the failure you face.”

                              Aaron opened his mouth, but Noah held up a hand. “You said that the people need you to lead, guide, and strengthen them. But Aaron, it’s not you that they need. They need Christ. You are just the messenger, not the Savior.”

                              Aaron felt a shock stab of guilt shoot through him. He opened his mouth and then closed it, finding nothing to say.

                              “You are not our Savior Aaron. That is a load not meant for you to bare. So stop trying,” said Noah, gently. “Once you let go of that, then I think you will find a much deeper peace and freedom then you have known. Nothing that you can do would ever be enough. We are not supposed to look to you Aaron. You are supposed to point the way to the Savior.”

                              Aaron put a hand over his eyes. “How has it all become so skewed? Where did things go wrong?”

                              “I think they went wrong when you thought that anything good that has happened here was your doing,” replied Noah, his tone firm but kind.

                              Aaron pushed his hair back from his forehead and let out a long breath.

                              “Aaron, terrible things happened to us, and I fear many more will. God is in control, and He will be with us every moment. ‘I give them eternal life, and they will never perish. No one can snatch them out of My hand.’ He is with us, Aaron. Turn to Him, and He will comfort and strengthen you.”

                              “But Noah, that’s what I’ve been doing out here,” replied Aaron. “Every night, sometimes all night, I’m out here crying out and begging Him to answer me. There’s nothing.”

                              “Maybe there’s nothing, or perhaps your ears are closed. Maybe He’s been speaking to you this whole time, and you have been doing so much talking you can’t hear His response. Maybe you should try being quiet for a little while. I would even suggest thinking back on all the ways God has been there when you needed Him.”

                              Aaron didn’t know how to reply to that. It felt so wrong having Noah help him, yet it was also a relief to finally be honest with someone.

                              Noah stood up and turned toward the stairs.

                              “Where are you going?” asked Aaron.

                              “I’ll be back,” Noah replied.

                              When he was gone, Aaron sat silently and stared over the city. It seemed so dark and silent. Aaron was sick of silence and darkness. He wanted light and he wanted answers. He wanted more then anything to see what lay ahead. If only he could get one glimpse in the future he would feel better. He was sure of it.

                              Noah’s steps startled him, and he looked up to see the young man had a lit candle in one hand, and was carrying a satchel in the other. “Here, I thought you’d like some light.” Noah set the candle down beside Aaron and dropped the satchel in his lap. “You know, you have God’s answers written down in your hand. Maybe you should pause and read them once in a while instead of just ranting about not having answers.”

                              Aaron reddened as he pulled his Bible out of his satchel. There was another book there, and Aaron picked it up. It was his journal, a book he hadn’t touched in a long time. There was also a quill pen and small bottle on ink that he had packed when he first left home. Aaron looked up at Noah. “Thank you.”

                              “For what?” asked Noah.

                              “Putting up with me when I kinda lost my head.”

                              Noah laughed. “Of course Aaron. I think you should talk to people more often. It might save you miserable nights like this.”

                              Aaron smiled sheepishly.

                              Noah went back down the stairs and Aaron crossed his legs and flipped his Bible open in his lap. He turned several pages, and let his eyes wonder here and there. All at once, a verse seem to jump right at him.

                              ‘My God, my God, why have You forsaken me?’

                              Aaron stared at those words for a long time. Then he looked at the rest of the page. It was Psalm 22, and Aaron read the next few lines.

                              ‘My God, my God, why have You forsaken me?
                              Why are You so far from saving me, from the words of my crying out?
                              O my God, I cry by day, but You do not answer,
                              and by night, but I find no rest.’

                              Aaron reread the verses again. Written right in front of him was the very heart of ever desperate prayer he had lifted up day after day. Slowly, he let his eyes travel to the next verses.

                              ‘Yet You are holy,
                              enthroned on the praises of Israel.
                              In You our fathers trusted;
                              hey trusted, and You delivered them.

                              To You they cried and were rescued;
                              in You they trusted and were not put to shame.’

                              Aaron had identified with scripture before–– especially the Psalms. But, never had he felt so strongly that God was speaking straight to him that very moment. Aaron closed his eyes. “Oh Lord, please continue to speak to me. Give me comfort.” Looking down at the page again, Aaron read the last lines of the Psalm. It didn’t even seem to him that he was reading, but rather listening with his very heart and soul.

                              ‘The afflicted shall eat and be satisfied;
                              those who seek Him shall praise the Lord!
                              May your hearts live forever!

                              All the ends of the earth shall remember
                              and turn to the Lord,
                              and all the families of the nations
                              shall worship before You.
                              For kingship belongs to the Lord,
                              and He rules over the nations.

                              All the prosperous of the earth eat and worship;
                              before Him shall bow all who go down to the dust,
                              even the one who could not keep himself alive.

                              Generations shall serve Him;
                              it shall be told of the Lord to the coming generation;
                              they shall come and proclaim His righteousness to a people yet unborn,
                              that He has done it.’

                              “You have done it,” whispered Aaron. “No I, but You. All the ends of the earth shall remember, all nations shall bow… because You have done it.”

                              Aaron set down his Bible and opened his journal. Uncapping the bottle of ink, he wetted his quill and began to write.

                              My enemies, they pursue me, setting his traps I feel them circling. Like a lion, the Empire has trapped us. Like a lion, the devil hunts me. He lies in wait to take my life, to kill my faith, to strangle my hope. You, Lord, watched as I spent my tears. You watched as I wept and cried out to You. Not one tear fell that You did not see. Not one word was spoken that You did not hear. Now I will hide myself in the shadow of Your wings. I will not fear.

                              My God my God, why have you forsaken me? My God my God, why have you forsaken me? Can you hear me crying out to You? Can You see these hands lifted up? Do You know the pain that’s crushing me?

                              Aaron let out a slow breath, and his hand shook a little. He dipped his quill in the ink and held it poised over the page. Then, letting go of everything that had held him back and stepping out in faith, Aaron began to write.

                              Though my tears may fall, though my heart may brake, I will trust in You. I will trust in You! In the wildness, in the darkest night, I will trust in You! I will trust in You! When I am afraid, when I’m filled with doubt, You’re my hiding place. I will trust in You. I know that You are King and You are Lord. Help me trust in You. Bring me comfort, bring me peace. Be a shelter from this storm, and a hiding place in the war. Be a light in this darkness. You have called me here, You have never left my side. You protected me in the battle when I was untrained and fighting for my life. You have spoken through me to thee people. You have been there every step of the way. You preserved my life in the fire that took my parents and you brought me to the home of a God man. You have been raising me up for this very task. Help me to trust You, to step forward in faith. Help me to keep my eyes on you as I walk across the raging sea. Forgive me for my pride, and for my doubt. Give me peace and let me feel You once again. Fill me with Your spirit and open my eyes to the truth.

                              Aaron set down his quill and looked upward. It seemed as though all at once a veil was parted or a mist lifted. He could see the beauty of the sky and the light of a thousand stars. The glory and majesty of God’s creation took his breath away. “You made every star and set it in it’s perfect place. You have made me and set me in the place you have called me to stand. Just give me strength, Lord, and I will stand. I need help though, because I know now that I can’t do this on my own. You took Turin and Edwin for a reason. Help me to let the, Go, Father. Help me to trust You. Comfort us all in this time. Use me to bring peace and comfort to your people. Give me strength.”

                              Riker dropped his voice to a soft whisper. “…I’m home.”

                              #184315
                              Keilah H.
                              @keilah-h
                                • Rank: Chosen One
                                • Total Posts: 4732

                                @ellette-giselle oooh I like this scene! And I can see where you incorporated our tips…..

                                Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.

                                #184321
                                calyhuge
                                @calyhuge
                                  • Rank: Wise Jester
                                  • Total Posts: 71

                                  @ellette-giselle

                                  The second to last thing you wrote, just one tiny thing, maybe not quite so much crying. When I’m sad, I just stare off into the distance. Other than that, he’s definitely masculine, especially in the parts preceding the roof parts.

                                  And I was about to say, like a stereotypical guy trying to fix all the problems, “Why doesn’t he read the Bible duh” but you thought of that one 😛

                                  And even though the Empire is pagan, it sounds like Catholics in the 16th century, because by that point they mostly acted like pagans (the ones that didn’t didn’t make it into the history books). Their tactics of killing everybody sound similar.

                                  All in all, sounds good.

                                  I ❤️ Debating Theology
                                  I ❤️ Family Heritage
                                  I ❤️ Medievals

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