The Woods of Rosen

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  • #200400
    TheShadow
    @theshadow
      • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
      • Total Posts: 653

      @ellette-giselle

      Use the dash if you want it to read as a sudden horrifying shock, use the dots if you want it to be a slow realization that settles into horror.

      Ah, okay that works better. Thanks!

      I have been swamped lately, but we’ll see if I can have her to you this week.

      Take your time! Thanks for the comments, I’m glad the chapter gave some sort of reaction.


      @hybridlore

      Thank you! As for why Adaline and Olivia don’t really seem to care, you’ll find out why later on. Dylan… uh, yeah, Dylan actually does care about his family, so I’ll make a note to include that more.

      @everyone

      From this point on where the story really picks up, please, please rip into these chapters. Be as brutal as possible, if something doesn’t make sense or is contrived or bothering you, please comment that. Thanks again for reading this.

      "And she realized that Gnag the Nameless' best efforts to blacken the world would only serve to sc

      #200435
      Linus Smallprint
      @linus-smallprint
        • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
        • Total Posts: 1290

        @theshadow

        “Maybe this corner is a dead end.” Jack remarked, turning round. He started, taking a double look. “Uh, the path behind us is gone.”

        Hard to follow the rule of staying on the path when the path itself won’t cooperate.

        Olivia turned round, and, with the force of a wave on a stormy day, slapped Adaline.

        Nice!

        “How do you intend on getting up there, then?” Adaline asked. She had a point, considering the trees towered above with few branches to serve as footholds. “And wouldn’t we set the forest on fire?”

        Okay. I was wondering why none of them were climbing the trees to look at their surroundings.

        Looks good! Waiting for the next part.

         

         

        Sometimes it is necessary to paint the sky black in order to see the stars.

        #200603
        TheShadow
        @theshadow
          • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
          • Total Posts: 653

          @linus-smallprint

          Hard to follow the rule of staying on the path when the path itself won’t cooperate.

          Yep lol.

          Nice!

          You guys really like the slap part huh? XD

          Looks good! Waiting for the next part.

          Thanks!

          "And she realized that Gnag the Nameless' best efforts to blacken the world would only serve to sc

          #200672
          TheShadow
          @theshadow
            • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
            • Total Posts: 653

            @keilah-h @hybridlore @ellette-giselle @the_lost-journal @liberty @whalekeeper @linus-smallprint

            As of right now, I have re-done parts of The Woods of Rosen which are now integral to where the story is headed (this is because I realized they would work better for the story and characters). So, I’m thinking instead of posting the chapters of the books on KP, that instead I’ll put a link to a google doc and put the chapters there for critiques. This is just mainly because, taking these new additions into account, it would be confusing for you guys to read the next parts without the context of the additions to the pre-posted chapters. If you guys are willing to, could you re-read the first two or three chapters once I post the link because I’ve added new stuff to them? You don’t have to if you don’t want to or have time to, it’s really only to add context to events in the future chapters.

            Whoops. That was a long ramble, wasn’t it?

            "And she realized that Gnag the Nameless' best efforts to blacken the world would only serve to sc

            #200682
            hybridlore
            @hybridlore
              • Rank: Chosen One
              • Total Posts: 2646

              @theshadow

              Hm, tags seem to be working kind of weird. Our names are not in blue, but I still got an email. ?

              Absolutely! That seems like it would work great. Let me know when you send out the link!

              "Don't shine so that others can see you. Shine so that through you, others can see Him." ~ C.S.L.

              #200735
              Linus Smallprint
              @linus-smallprint
                • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                • Total Posts: 1290

                @theshadow

                Okay, sounds fine, but you might want to check out Ellette’s profile first. She just put some warning there about using Google.

                Sometimes it is necessary to paint the sky black in order to see the stars.

                #200896
                TheShadow
                @theshadow
                  • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                  • Total Posts: 653

                  @hybridlore

                  Thanks! I might switch over to Reedsey though, considering Ellette’s post now.


                  @linus-smallprint

                  Oh goodness, thanks for telling me. That’s really scary, I knew Google wasn’t great but that seems much too far.

                  "And she realized that Gnag the Nameless' best efforts to blacken the world would only serve to sc

                  #204327
                  TheShadow
                  @theshadow
                    • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                    • Total Posts: 653

                    @keilah-h @hybridlore @ellette-giselle @the_lost-journal @liberty @whalekeeper @linus-smallprint

                    It has been a very long time since I last posted on this topic (3 months apparently). First, I’d like to thank everyone who read my draft; it was a huge help, and helped me re-evaluate my entire story.

                    Second, I re-evaluated my story and have changed almost everything with the characters, plot, scenes, etc. I mainly did this because I realized things were kind of just happening in the original draft and characters reacted and that was basically it, and I hadn’t really established a concrete outline. So here we are. If any of you would be open to it, I would appreciate if you could read and critique the current draft. If not, that’s totally okay, and thank you again for reading the past one.

                    "And she realized that Gnag the Nameless' best efforts to blacken the world would only serve to sc

                    #204328
                    Ellette Giselle
                    @ellette-giselle
                      • Rank: Chosen One
                      • Total Posts: 4714

                      @theshadow

                       

                      I’ll try to get to it!

                      And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who couldn't hear the music

                      #204410
                      TheShadow
                      @theshadow
                        • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                        • Total Posts: 653

                        @ellette-giselle

                        Thank you! I’ll try posting on Thursdays.

                        "And she realized that Gnag the Nameless' best efforts to blacken the world would only serve to sc

                        #204442
                        hybridlore
                        @hybridlore
                          • Rank: Chosen One
                          • Total Posts: 2646

                          @theshadow

                          Nice to see you back! (Ha, I know I’ve already talked to you, but still. ;))

                          I’m not sure I’ll be able to commit to another full project right now, but I might pop in occasionally. So glad you were able to figure out some more stuff this time around, though!

                          "Don't shine so that others can see you. Shine so that through you, others can see Him." ~ C.S.L.

                          #204490
                          TheShadow
                          @theshadow
                            • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                            • Total Posts: 653

                            @hybridlore

                            Thank you, and thanks for letting me know!


                            @ellette-giselle

                            Some stuff happened, so I’ll probably be posting the first chapter later today.

                            "And she realized that Gnag the Nameless' best efforts to blacken the world would only serve to sc

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