Home Page › Forums › Other Art Forms › Poetry › Poetry Critiques › The Shabby Guitar Poem
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November 12, 2023 at 12:03 am #164224
I’d appreciate any and all feedback on this one! It’s an older poem of mine that I really want to polish and improve. Thanks! 😀
The Shabby Guitar
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Silent is the shabby guitar
Locked and put away
Faded are the songs it made
Folded are the hands that played
—-
Silent is the shabby guitar
Slowly losing its tune
While people come and they go
With the sun and rain and snow
—-
Still silent is the shabby guitar
Alone it patiently waits
Until strange hands take it from its place
And carefully remove it from its case
—-
Upon the silent, shabby guitar
Sunlight reveals each dent and scar
The glossy finish is worn and rubbed,
It is an old guitar, which once was loved.
—-
The hands stroke the shabby guitar
Like it’s a long-lost friend,
And then, slightly quivering
Draw their fingertips across the strings
—-
A sound comes from the shabby guitar
A long, sad chord that trembles and aches
Like a heart that has lost someone dear,
Someone who was once alive and near.
—-
The hands then tune the shabby guitar
Painstakingly taking their time:
All six strings are plucked and tested
Each ivory knob carefully twisted.
—-
The shabby guitar is strummed again
And this time, a chord clear and sweet
Springs forth from the instrument
The joyful sound resonates a moment.
—-
Tears fall on the shabby guitar
And the hand that strummed the metal strings
Pauses and hastily wipes them away
Before once again resuming to play
—-
Now the guitar is not put away
But placed conveniently within reach
No longer will its case gather dust
Nor will the strings stretch and rust;
—-
Now the guitar is not shabby
But its finish is restored and gleaming;
No longer silent, it sings
Whenever hands dance upon its strings,
—-
As they strum the treasured guitar
Fondest memories fill the ear
And as its sweet music rises and fades
New, beloved memories are made.
November 15, 2023 at 12:15 am #164563Ooo, I like this poem.
I’m not the most amazing of a poet, but I’ll post any polishing I can think of in a bit.
Thanks for sharing!
First Grand Historian of Arreth and the Lesser Realms (aka Kitty)
Fork the GorkNovember 17, 2023 at 9:31 pm #165007Thanks, @koshka! That would be great. 🙂
I wrote this poem after my uncle’s passing. He was self-taught on guitar and left a few of the instruments behind (as well as many people who loved him).
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