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@freedomwriter76
Oh, so this is a recurring thing, so it will likely fix itself latter? Do you have an estimation for how long then?
Oh, thanks, Hi! I’m doing wonderful this fine afternoon:) Actually just left and took a nap a little longer than I meant😅 How about you?
He is perfect in Justice, yet He is perfect in Mercy, even when we fail Him. For this, He is good.
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@thearcaneaxiom. Yes, it should fix itself. I sadly do not have an estimated time frame though. 😔😅
You’re welcome! 💕 Glad to hear you’re doing wonderful!!! Ahhhh…we’ve all done that before! 😉😅😆 I’m sure it was refreshing though. 😉 I’m doing really good! Glad we have clear blue skies outside where I live today! I was getting tired of the cloudy and rainy weather, lol. 😆
@freedomwriter76
That’s awesome! Clear sky’s are always refreshing, not that I don’t have a love for rain, but it can get old, lol:)
He is perfect in Justice, yet He is perfect in Mercy, even when we fail Him. For this, He is good.
- Rank: Chosen One
- Total Posts: 8156
@thearcaneaxiom. Yeah, the rain can get very old, lol. 😆
@freedomwriter76
How are you doing? 🙂
Alright thanks!
I’ve been writing a bit!!! How about you? 😁
Oh a little! More worldbuilding than writing. Trying to figure out book 2. Do you use plot structures? I’m going to try to follow the hero’s journey to some extent, because it already aligns pretty well with it. It’s basically going to be about Layson’s life as a releaser for about… a year I think? I’m hoping to make a bunch of cool maps and stuff for it, because he travels so much. Gotta come up with a lot of names now…
Also his story may or may not have an actual villian… 🤔 not sure.
Woah that was really good! Leo… I love him 😭😭
The descriptions are so vivid.. like I feel like I feel what he’s going through 😭
(Like actually though when I saw you had put some of your writing there, I went and turned on my reading music to get the full experience : ) )
Here’s a bit of what I’m going for for the farther away locations of the world, lots of ruins of cities/war factories. I might change some things, this is slightly older writing, but still the same atmosphere I’m going for. Layson is like… 18? maybe 19 here?
Layson looks down briefly at his map. Cool evening air blows through his blond hair, running it away from his face. The map falters slightly under the wind, but he pulls it straight again. Layson nods before stuffing the map back into his backpack. He closes the top latches securely shut before swinging it back onto his shoulder.
“What?” Maylee’s small soft voice travels up from her seat at Layson’s feet.
“Looks like we’re heading straight!”
Layson points up ahead. The sun glares from behind one of many large structures, dilapidated with age and tear. Large otherworldly craters eat into the earth, casting shadows into there own bowls. Layson looks up longingly at the sky, hues of purple and orange flitting between the clouds. He shifts his weight, noticing his sore muscles and aching joints.
“Are we going somewhere?”
Layson looks over at Maylee, now standing beside him eagerly awaiting an answer.
“Yep. We need to find a place to rest for the night.” Layson says, taking Maylee’s hand as they start off into the ruined landscape.
Stars dance through the distant treetops to their left. Maylee totters along next to Layson, tired but eager for the next chapter of adventure. Laysons boots thud against the hard packed soil. Tall, dried grass brushes against his legs, coming up to Maylee’s face.
“Eh!” Maylee makes a disgruntled face at a piece of grass as it snaps back into her face.
“Here.” Layson reaches down to pick her up. Maylee wraps he small arms around his neck, slowly bouncing in his arms in time to his footsteps.
Maylee shivers as the sun threatens to leave them. They walk in the open towards the large structures. Layson tightens his arms around her, feeling the eerie tension grow as the light turns dim. Large shadows cast along the wide-open pathway, and tall buildings tower on either side. A couple scattered rays escape through a cracked window, barely hanging and crooked in its hinges. Layson glances down at Maylee, noticing the fear in her eyes. He stops in the pathway, his stretching shadow mixing with the others around him.
“It’s ok.” Layson says softly.
“Scary.”
“Yes. It’s a little scary.” Layson tries to hide the fear in his own voice.
Maylee turns inward, resting her head against his chest. Her eyes slowly lull closed with each rocking step forwards. Layson sighs, smiling through a dim sorrow.
“One day Maylee.” Layson whispers, glancing down at his daughter, fast asleep in his arms. “One day, we’ll have a home.”
Layson smiles ruefully as the suns rays wink out from the horizon. Orange light, once basking them in a warm glow, draws back to it’s source. A cold air swirls around the two of them as they walk, causing
Layson to shiver. Tall towers grow up from the ground around them, and rubble lays at the sides of the broad lane, providing glimpses of the great city there once was. Power was in this place, and it was likely decimated in a matter of hours. The craters tell the story.
Layson wipes hot tears away from his eyes, still walking steadily.
This is no home. But it’ll have to do.
With no trees in sight, Layson looks around for the sturdiest structure. All nearly as strange as the one before, he makes a blind choice. Walking with caution, he approaches one of the structures. The floor looks to be of packed dirt, although uneven. A couple stray old vines wrap the banisters to an old stairway, which only goes up halfway before cracking.
I suppose this place used to have a 2nd floor.
Layson looks up through the open ceiling, only a couple support beams obstructing his view of the night sky. Sitting down slowly to not wake Maylee, he sets his backpack down on the ground next to him. A couple stray grass sprigs sprout from the age-old dirt. He lowers Maylee gently into his lap before rummaging in his backpack. Layson removes a sweater, then buckles the top shut again. He pulls the sweater on over his head, and the breezes edge lessons. Situating his backpack under his head like a pillow, he lays down on the hard dirt, pulling Maylee close. Her eyes briefly flutter open, but she quickly yawns and falls back asleep. Maylee settles into Laysons arms, trying to gain every bit of warmth she can against the night draft. Starlight beams down on the two of them. Layson lays awake, trying to block out the strange sites of the broken place.
The things that must have happened here to leave it in this condition…
Layson lays back against the dirt again, relishing the starry night. Slowly shifting up in a mesmerizing swirl, the many lights peppering the sky provide a cool even glow.
Isn’t it so strange that we all see the same sky, no matter where we are?
Layson smiles.
Somewhere, somebody else far away is looking up at this same sky, marveling at it’s beauty, just as I am.
He closes his eyes on fresh tears, causing them to roll down his cheeks. Blinking them open again, Layson stares up at the sky through blurred vision. Maylee stirs briefly, causing him to turn his attention back to her.
I wish I had a home for you.
Layson frowns, slowly lifting an arm to wipe his tears away.
I wish I had a wonderful little home with a warm fire, enclosed and safe, just for you, Maylee.
Layson bites his lip, stifling the urge to cry. He wipes his tears away with his sleeve, but fresh ones quickly replace them.
“Hm?” Maylee’s innocent eyes stare up at him.
“O-oh. Im s-sorry Maylee-“ Layson’s voice chokes with tears.
“What’s wrong?” Concern spreads across Maylee’s face.
“Maylee, I wish I could do better for you.” Layson lets out a cry, no longer trying to keep it back.
“Better?” She looks up at him, confused. “What do you mean?”
“I uh…” Layson trails off, putting one hand on Maylee’s small head. “I wish we had a home.”
“A home? Like the bunkers?”
“Well… I think there’s more to it than that.” Layson says, gently stroking her hair.
“Oh.”
I want to have a real home, with a constant roof over our heads, and-
I really want to get married. I want Maylee to have a mom too.
Layson leans back against his backpack again, Maylee settling in ontop of him.
“I love you, Maylee.”
“I love you too!” Maylee says groggily, but with excitement.
Layson smiles, letting his eyes fall shut.
Anyways yeah! what do you think?
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
- Rank: Chosen One
- Total Posts: 8156
@mineralizedwritings. Glad to hear you’re doing alright! 🙂 And you’re very welcome!!! 💕💕💕
Oh a little! More worldbuilding than writing.
Lol, I get that! But thank goodness, I write Historical Fiction, so I don’t have to worldbuild much, lol! 😆
Trying to figure out book 2.
Ooh, fun!!! 😁😁😁
Do you use plot structures? I’m going to try to follow the hero’s journey to some extent, because it already aligns pretty well with it. It’s basically going to be about Layson’s life as a releaser for about… a year I think? I’m hoping to make a bunch of cool maps and stuff for it, because he travels so much. Gotta come up with a lot of names now…
Ooh, it sounds interesting!!! But no, I don’t really pay that much attention to structures, tbh, lol…I’m just trying to have a good story with good characters and themes…not worrying so much about following a strict guideline, y’know? 😉
Also his story may or may not have an actual villian… 🤔 not sure.
Oh…? 🤔🤔🤔
Woah that was really good! Leo… I love him 😭😭
The descriptions are so vivid.. like I feel like I feel what he’s going through 😭
(Like actually though when I saw you had put some of your writing there, I went and turned on my reading music to get the full experience : ) )
Aww, thanks!!! IKR…he’s just so sweet and lovable and hurt!!! 😭😭😭😭
Thank you so much! Yeah…I feel it too…*sniffs*
Haha, I’m glad you got the full experience then!!! 😆💕😁
Anyways yeah! what do you think?
I LOVE IT!!! 😍😍😍😍 I can really see the setting, it was described so well!!!, Layson and Maylee’s relationship is the absolute SWEETEST, and I can really feel for Layson right now! 😭😭😭
@freedomwriter76
Lol yeah! Ig you do more research. I do need to research to make the mines more realistic though, idk how mining works XD
Yup! I looooove leooooooo
I LOVE IT!!! 😍😍😍😍 I can really see the setting, it was described so well!!!, Layson and Maylee’s relationship is the absolute SWEETEST, and I can really feel for Layson right now! 😭😭😭
Thanks so much girl!! Aw I’m glad you think so! Ikr? He just wants some rest 😭
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
- Rank: Chosen One
- Total Posts: 8156
Lol yeah! Ig you do more research. I do need to research to make the mines more realistic though, idk how mining works XD
Yeah…lots of research. 😅😬😆 Lol, yeah…but I think you’re doing a really good job!!! 👍🏻
Yup! I looooove leooooooo
Girl…you and me bothhhhh…😍😍😍
Thanks so much girl!! Aw I’m glad you think so! Ikr? He just wants some rest 😭
You are soooo welcome!!! 💕💕💕💕 Yeah, poor Layson, the poor boi! 😭😭😭😭
Hi Min! I haven’t gotten a chance to read any of your writing until now, and I love it! I’m really glad you went with a different dynamic than most dystopians with the father daughter, and it works so well! I am curious about your worldbuilding. Is this a dystopian earth, or some other planet or universe? What lead to the fall of this world, was it war, invasion, meteor shower, ect?
He is perfect in Justice, yet He is perfect in Mercy, even when we fail Him. For this, He is good.
Hi Min! I haven’t gotten a chance to read any of your writing until now, and I love it! I’m really glad you went with a different dynamic than most dystopians with the father daughter, and it works so well! I am curious about your worldbuilding. Is this a dystopian earth, or some other planet or universe? What lead to the fall of this world, was it war, invasion, meteor shower, ect?
Thanks! I haven’t read a lot of dystopian, so I wasn’t actually aware I was doing something different lol! Thanks! I’m glad it works!
Yep! It’s dystopian, but I consider it more post-dystopian. The war is long past, and the world has been almost uninhabited for long time. Thanks for giving me a chance to rant about my worldbuilding 😂 here’s the jist of it:
(think of this place as a big country, a bit like america.)
400 years ago, there was a devastating civil war. Many years of long-standing hatred between two political sides destroyed the earth in a relatively short period of time. Each side thought they would win. Neither predicted the mass destruction that was to come. Nobody cared what happened to the people left over, they were merely an afterthought (my series is called the afterthoughts series.) The remaining people were afraid, knowing there were still some of the other side left. They left to live in bunkers underground. Mostly self sufficient (still relied on a couple brave outsiders for resources not grown underground) Each group split up into there own bunkers scattered across the country. 400 years later, fear keeps them from leaving. The fear of a second civil war keeps them inside, as some still allow the hatred of there ancestors to fester. The world is now a different place then they remember it. With the lack of habitation, plants and animals have thrived. The craters are still there as a reminder, and some of the landscape hasn’t recovered, but they don’t know the difference, after all, they’ve never seen the light of day.
So yeah! That’s the basics. Layson and a couple others live outside. He used to live in the west hills bunkers, the main setting for book 1. If you feel like reading some more, I have a forum thread with about the first 3rd of my 1st book. 😃
If you want to share about your world building feel free and I’d love to hear about it, just keep in mind I’m pretty sensitive and I try not to write/read anything the slightest bit creepy lol.
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
- Rank: Chosen One
- Total Posts: 8156
@mineralizedwritings. @godlyfantasy12. @lightoverdarkness6. @esther-c. @elishavet-pidyon. @gwyndalf-the-wise. @anyone-else-interested-lol.
Sooo…I finally made boards for Leon and Riker from the sequel book!!! 😍😍😍
First off, Leon’s!!!
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And…Riker!!! My Baby!!! 😍😍😍😍
That’s awesome! Your welcome, we all love to rant about our works, I sometimes feel bad for not asking people enough about their’s🙃
I’m still wondering though, is this Earth, or some other planet? You say a big country like America, so not earth, but then you use the word earth later, sooo, is this civil war already so far in the future that America isn’t a thing anymore, it’s a whole knew set of countries coating the world? Either way, these two powers defiantly don’t have any history of the cold war. Both sides knew that if either attacked, they would both lose, so it was a long stand off, until it ended in a truce. The two powers in your world didn’t have that foresight for some reason, what convinced them that they had the upper hand? I actually looovvve your title, the cruel irony of it really get’s ya once you have that context.
Thanks, I’ll look into that forum!
I would love to rant about my world, I’ll have to later though, I gotta go now, but I’ll catch you later!!!
(I get not liking the creepiness. The creepiest I’ve gotten is with Tailen’s story with a bad dream, so I’ll just skip over that:) )
He is perfect in Justice, yet He is perfect in Mercy, even when we fail Him. For this, He is good.
@freedomwriter76
Oh love it!
“My story your glory, my pain your purpose”
Was that line from Mathew wests song, “My story, your glory?”
"And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."
@freedomwriter76
Hey girl!!! Couldn’t be on earlier today bc of cleaning the house and going to the store with my Dad, but what’s up? How’s life? How’s writing? 😊💕😊💕
Hey!! Oh, that’s okay!! Ooh sounds fun! Life is…well, it’s pretty good. I’m getting through it. The last couple of days have been kinda rough. Today was great tho! 😊 Thank you for asking 💕😊.
Writing is going good! I’ve been writing a heart-wrenching scene, as always XD. No, the middle is heart wrenching, but the end…well, I can post it if I ever finish it! 😅 It’s a little violent tho…
LEOOOOO!!!! NOOO!!! OMG his scenes always makes me want to cry 😭. But they’re so good!! And sad and sweet 💕😭.
Great! I’m pretty good, just went to micheals and the dollar store so automatically pretty good day lol. I got some better skin color markers so now my people won’t look orangey XD
Aw, good! Oh awesome!! XDXD I have that same problem. (But hey, I couldn’t tell that they looked orangey in the drawings you posted! They looked great :).
#HugRikerSquad
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