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  • #142171
    GodlyFantasy12
    @godlyfantasy12
      • Rank: Chosen One
      • Total Posts: 6647

      Ello my dearies!!

      I have decided to make this forum for all of us, seeing as we have a forum to go to for seemingly whatever (the Chat Chat) a forum to share our writings, forums for fantasy creatures and fun stuff, but what about when we need help on things included with the above forums? Or just questions for anything with our writing?

       

      We have to jump from forum to forum wondering where this question might fit and for me it’s annoying and idk where to put my question and then I end up not asking it but inside I’m likE “HELP ME” XD

      ANYWAY!!

       

      so I made this chat!!! Sorta like the Q&A part of the CWW page, where people could ask writing questions and get help and stuff!!

      So yea!! Uhh…here it is XD XD

      #IfMarcelDiesIRiot
      #ProtectMarcel
      #ProtectSeb

      #142172
      GodlyFantasy12
      @godlyfantasy12
        • Rank: Chosen One
        • Total Posts: 6647

        Annnd I already have a question I could use advice with XD

        SO!! Anyone who would like to offer some advice…feel free lol!!

        Currently I’m drafting book 1 (draft…4? I believe?) and I have made an outline, but apparently I’m also gonna end up pantsing some of it too XD

        that being said, I feel like my book is a bit too…

        Boring?

        Idk.

        Its a the first of a fantasy series, so it’s the starting point, but it is essential.

        However, I want to make it a bit more…

        Idk if action packed is the word…just…more outward conflict?

        There is a lot of inner conflict, but I feel like there isn’t enough outward. That’s what it is.

         

        So far, the main gist is this:

        Heroine and Hero are best friends-

        Heroine (Arabella) is struggling with dreams that have become more vivid and real recently. She finds out her kingdom is set to be attacked by an evil entity, spurring her on a bit of a clue-hunt following a journal to try and find out how to save her kingdom. (This hunt takes place within her kingdom due to the fact she can’t leave the kingdom lol)

        Hero (November) is struggling with his personal life, wanting so badly to please his father. The chance arises to seemingly do so, but it’s through not so great means…AKA spying on his best friends family. He doesn’t understand why…but he does it, chasing his father’s approval.

        Neither get anywhere, as neither are addressing their problems (and they’re also keeping secrets and not working together)

        Eventually they come back together-yada yada-midpoint-yada yada-darkest moment-yada yada- they save A’Grend but with a sacrifice.

         

        XD XD

         

        okay that sounds great….

        But it’s the part where there separated that I’m struggling with…

        basically…

        The scenes are just Ara looking around A’Grend, following clues in a journal…

        (kinda boring…)

        and November listening in on conversations and doing some…not great things…which isn’t as boring but I’m not entirely sure what to do to…add to the conflict?

        Because I don’t want to make November a bad guy, because he isn’t. He does make mistakes but he can come back from them, ya know?

         

        And as for adding outward conflict…A’Grend isn’t really a…fighting kingdom? So like action wise I’m not sure what could happen, but I’m trying to think if there’s anything I could add…

        Becahse in the end, they do basically break out against the Kingdom, overtaken by rebellion…

        And that would be kinda weird to just…jump into that…

         

         

        Okay that was long…BUT IDK WHAT TO DO ENTIRELY….I have ideas but also…yea I need help XD

        #IfMarcelDiesIRiot
        #ProtectMarcel
        #ProtectSeb

        #142185
        Otherworldly Historian
        @otherworldlyhistorian
          • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
          • Total Posts: 232

          @godlyfantasy12

           

          Just a question (please don’t get offended I am just kind of confused). Why is Ara looking for clues boring? I mean that is like basically the way all mystery stories work. I can probably help you with more details on what makes it feel boring though could give you pointers without it if you want.

           

          As forNovembers plot isn’t it basically I would run it as a fantasy political thriller if you aren’t already.

          Also November will probably only not feel like as much of a messed up person if he/reader believes what he is doing is actually good (until bear the end of course). He will also feel less evil if he has a corruption arc instead of just throwing him in (not sure what you are planning)

           

          I will probably respond with more later when I have more time (maybe lunch).

           

           

          Through darkness,
          light shines brightest

          #142186
          Smiley
          @smiley
            • Rank: Chosen One
            • Total Posts: 2210

            @godlyfantasy12

            So you could add people (like the village folk) who want to gang control of the kingdom and maybe one of your characters runs into them and they might act out in violence. (Just an idea, I don’t know much about the story so you might have something like this XD Because in a town it’s kind of hard to believe that everyone likes it.)

            Also, something to remember is in Narnia’s “Prince Caspian” three-quarters of the book is spent wandering around in the woods (Which sounds boring) but C.S Lewis focuses on the emotional battle of the characters and whether they believe in Aslan.

            You have Peter who believes he was the one that defeated the white witch (even though it was Aslan)

            Susan doesn’t like to get her hopes up and prefers to believe in the curtain

            Edmund and Lucy who are both often treated like the youngest but when they see Aslan they have to try to convince the others

            Overall C.S Lewis focused more on the emotional struggle which is still appealing and entertaining

            Tell me if any of these helps XD It’s what I could come up with right now but I’ll keep thinking

            Do me a favor…. Tell Cress I meant it
            -Thorne

            #142192
            Otherworldly Historian
            @otherworldlyhistorian
              • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
              • Total Posts: 232

              @godlyfantasy12

              Got some free time in history so I am going to procrastinate and type up this 😄.

               

              I agree with @smiley that characters are important. I will say that one thing I recommend you do is focus on character development.

              For the sake of a common example of what not to do, I would like to use KOTLC (please don’t get mad at me). The main reason I stopped reading that series is that the character development wasn’t handled very well (after halfway through the series most of the characters stop developing) and the plot never advances very far (the first half of the series is actually good and this mostly only applies to the latter books). I would recommend that you don’t get too caught up on doing certain plot points (or characters) that your story suffers.

              I would say that having good side characters would also probably help and using Ara’s plotline to slowly peal back the layers of what is happening could hopefully keep your readers in suspense until the final.

              I recently read this book called The Blade Itself (it is pretty good and I would recommend it but it does have a good deal of cursing and violence (one of the MCs is a torture master for the basically secret police)). It did a really good job of basically advancing the plot like 20ft and keeping you entertained for the entire thing. This worked because there are a lot of fine details and side plots, and the character development is extremely good.

              I would say that fine details can be really helpful generally as you can use them as either easter eggs or set up for aspects of the main plot. You could also (since you are doing multi-narrative) make one character’s plot show some fine detail that actually ties into another character’s plot (ie Ara is searching for clues and one of the things she finds is not immediately relevant to her but as the reader you also know Novembers plot and the thing is actually the answer to some question from Novembers plot). Tell me if that doesn’t make since.

              Through darkness,
              light shines brightest

              #142193
              whaley
              @whalekeeper
                • Rank: Chosen One
                • Total Posts: 3611

                @godlyfantasy12

                Guurrl I struggle with the saaame thing. It’s almost like internal conflict is easier to invent than external conflict. XD

                First off, I try to consider the character’s inward goal, and try to personify it with an outward goal. It takes a bit to think of one, but as long as you keep your character’s world and culture in mind, it’s a bit easier.

                It can be super simple, but with lots of smaller conflicts leading up to it.

                For example, my charrie Sebastian wants someone who understands his unique point of view, and loves him despite his testy personality. So, keeping his world and family in mind – his world is extremely hard to navigate, and his family is distant – I invented an outward goal.

                Seb wants to find his missing mother. She is a famous and elusive actress, who only appears in the highest of societies, after leaving his father.

                Now, I invent a bunch of obstacles. Seb has to become rich and famous super fast. He has to be super charming all the time. He has to hide the fact that he’s a ten-year-old genius from the public. He has to navigate complex relationships at dinner parties. AND he has to know which dimensions to shift to, at just the right times. ALL while his father is chasing him down, trying to stop him.

                I like to think of that as the Basic Goal, plus basic obstacles.

                Okay okay, BRAIN DUMP TIME.

                So November wants to impress his father? What is he good at? Let’s say he’s good at singing (that’s what Seb is good at, anyway… Nevember, not so sure about XD). He could plan a performance, and try to get his dad to come. Or maybe, if his dad is in a royal council, he could try to train under the council itself, as an apprentice counselor.

                Maybe, in order to become a counselor, he has to get good grades in school. Will Ara help him? Will he discover along the way that he’s more interested in visiting Ara’s family?

                He’s afraid of blood? Weave in moments where other boys scrape their knees or something during a school activity, and he’s afraid to participate, so he gets a bad grade, and his dad is disappointed even MORE.

                He likes Ara? 😏 Let him impress her once in a while, with acts of November-ish bravery.

                Let’s say he begins to see hints of his magical ability throughout the school year (I’m also assuming there’s a school XD). Are people afraid of fire, here? Was there an ancient war turned sour by his kind? Has the kingdom ever burned down before? Does he accidentally set his homework on fire?? 😂

                Does one of the faerie tribes pop in, to warn the kingdom of a distant threat? Maybe one of these faeries is related to Pax!! And the kingdom keeps it under wraps, because they want everyone to be happy and peaceful. But Ara senses things are wrong, and enlists November to listen in on the counsil’s conversations!

                Where’s November’s mother and (undiscovered) sister? Does he begin to discover old papers or scrolls about his family history, in the school archives? This could be the perfect place to slip some worldbuilding in. At the same time, maybe he reads about some ancient evil, that will awaken at the climax of the story!!

                I guess what I’m saying is, just completely brain dump. Even if it’s something you probably won’t use, it could lead you to better ideas. And connect some internal struggles to the actual world, through everyday struggles, like school, family, work, love life.

                Like, I only wrote one question to start with – but my brain started to tick, and I couldn’t stop writing down ideas.

                Next up, what about the other characters? What are they doing? What about ARA?? I didn’t cover her very much. Mix her problems in, and things are even CRAZIER.

                Finally, if you want to, there’s the BIG GOAL. Aka, Change The World. How is this charrie’s story going to affect his entire universe?

                I’ll admit, this is harder 😅 And I’m still figuring it out myself. But I’d say just trickle in the bigger problems through mysterious means, like that school archives I mentioned.

                So first off, establish the Basic Goal, along with smaller goals and obstacles. Do that for all the charries, connecting them to the internal conflict. Then, slowly introduce the bigger, world-size stuff – aka, the rebellion you mentioned.

                I think what you need is just to brain dump a lot of side plot. That’ll give some meat to your story.

                Aaaaaand that’s it 😂 I hope that helped. It helped me, actually.

                #ProtectAdolinKholin

                #142196
                whaley
                @whalekeeper
                  • Rank: Chosen One
                  • Total Posts: 3611

                  Also, the whole idea of a peaceful godly kingdom reminds me of the album Dear Wormwood by the Oh Hellos, which I’m listening to rn. I’d definitely recommend you listen to it while brainstorming. 😉

                  #ProtectAdolinKholin

                  #142197
                  whaley
                  @whalekeeper
                    • Rank: Chosen One
                    • Total Posts: 3611

                    Oh and on top of that, it’s best to have all your obstacles follow a cohesive outline, so I’d recommend using the Three-Act-Story-Structure as a timeline to put your events on, if you haven’t already. Abbie Emmons has a great template if you decide to use it 😋

                    #ProtectAdolinKholin

                    #142198
                    whaley
                    @whalekeeper
                      • Rank: Chosen One
                      • Total Posts: 3611

                      Hehe I love rambling

                      #ProtectAdolinKholin

                      #142205
                      Loopy
                      @loopylin
                        • Rank: Chosen One
                        • Total Posts: 2536

                        I kinda struggle with the same thing, so I found all these responses helpful even though they’re not addressed to me. XD


                        @mineralizedwritings
                        @gwyndalf-the-wise @whalekeeper @godlyfantasy12 @freedomwriter76 @lightoverdarkness6 @theloonyone @anybodyelse (feel free to ignore)

                        Not to derail us from answering Godly’s question, (@godlyfantasy12 can I give you a different nickname? Like Fan? Or GF? XD “Godly” just feels weird.) but I also have a question.

                        I need a title for my comic book. For anyone who doesn’t know, it’s a sci-fi series about two twin sisters who travel around in their squid-like spaceship, trying to find their place in the universe. Their names are Eddie and Ellie, they’re both super short, they do random odd jobs including bounty hunting for a living, annnd I don’t know what else to add.

                        Anyone have any title ideas? I’m completely drawing a blank.

                        🎵It takes a long time to wait 🌻

                        #142207
                        Folith-Feolin
                        @folith-feolin
                          • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                          • Total Posts: 311

                          @loopylin

                           

                          Custodians of the Cosmos ?

                          #142210
                          Loopy
                          @loopylin
                            • Rank: Chosen One
                            • Total Posts: 2536

                            @folith-feolin

                            Ooo that sounds cool… but I’m not sure if custodians fits? Thanks for the suggestion! I’ll probably use the cosmos part? Idk…

                            🎵It takes a long time to wait 🌻

                            #142211
                            Euodia
                            @euodia-vision
                              • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                              • Total Posts: 1308

                              @loopylin

                              I like the cosmos suggestion… maybe paring it with related to travel? Like nomads, vagabonds, wayfarers… or something related to finding where they belong, like acceptance, fellowship, etc.

                              I rolled the log over and underneath was a tiny little stick and I was like, "That log had a child

                              #142212
                              GodlyFantasy12
                              @godlyfantasy12
                                • Rank: Chosen One
                                • Total Posts: 6647

                                @whalekeeper @otherworldlyhistorian @smiley

                                 

                                AHH THANK YALL SO MUCH!!!

                                Whaley- I love the brain dumping and while I’ve done that I haven’t gone like that off the charts like just craziness if that makes sense…? I’ve just still kept myself boxed up and that’s some of the problem I think.

                                 

                                ALSO I WANNA READ UR STORY ABOJT SEBASTIAN SO BAD…IT SOUNDS SO GOOOOOOOD

                                 

                                Historian- Thx for the advice!! Love it!! And as for why I thought the clue hunting was boring, some of it is how I’m imagining it now? Like I don’t have a ton of ideas for it?? If I work it right it can be cool, but I don’t have many ideas at the moment so rn it’s just “Ara reads a book. Ara follows book to…somewhere? Finds something. Ara repeats XD”

                                But now I think I’m gonna use the brain dump technique to get some ideas flowing…

                                Smiley- thank u for bringing up CS Lewis. I never really thought about that, because I always think about the external stuff, which is weird because….I don’t even read it for that all the time XD XD XD….I read it for the characters anyway, but I was still worried about my book not having enough…stuff XD

                                 


                                @loopylin

                                yea u can call me Fan! Or anything else (just maybe not GF cuz uhh…what that means XD XD XD) nothing bad just means girlfriend which is kinda weird 🤣

                                 

                                anyway as for a title….hmmmmm

                                 

                                So u could go about it multiple ways.

                                U could do it where their names are the overarching title of the series, and there is a different title for each book in said series:

                                 

                                Eddie & Ellie: Whatever of such and such XD

                                or you can have an overarching title for the series and do the same thing, like the title above that Folith mentioned-

                                Custodians of the Cosmos: Whatever of such and such.

                                 

                                 

                                I kinda like having Eddie and Ellie’s names as the overarching series title, like most comics/graphic novels do (think Superman, Batman, etc) and putting the two ideas together for the first book

                                Eddie & Ellie: Custodians of the Cosmos

                                #IfMarcelDiesIRiot
                                #ProtectMarcel
                                #ProtectSeb

                                #142213
                                Loopy
                                @loopylin
                                  • Rank: Chosen One
                                  • Total Posts: 2536

                                  @godlyfantasy12

                                  Lol yeah sorry I was joking about the “GF”. Sometimes I forget that you can’t tell because you can’t see my face.


                                  @euodia-vision

                                  Thank you both for the suggestions!

                                  🎵It takes a long time to wait 🌻

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