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@jenwriter17 aw really? I don’t remember Counted Worthy having any bad content (particularly in comparison to the Hunger Games and other similar books). Oh well, that’s fine.
Ooh, I hope you enjoy A Time to Die!! 😛
Writing Heroes ♦ Writing Hope // janemareeauthor.com.au
@jane-maree @dragon-snapper @dekreel @mariposa @aratrea @sam-kowal @daeus @anyone else
Okay, y’all…..
I’ve gotten together a rough blurb of my dystopian novel. very. rough. Lemme know what you think:
Independent teen Rin Adachi lives with the Outcasts. Those tossed aside by the government and society as unfit for city life. The diseased, the crippled, the disabled, the old. But there’s another kind: those that dare to resist the government. Yeah, Rin’s one of those. Along with Taro Hamasaki, the man who raised her after her family was killed by the government.
When an assignment leaves a young boy dead, Rin wonders about the meaning of it all. The purpose of it all. Of life.
There’s something the government doesn’t want people to know. And that’s the answer to her questions. Rin goes on a wild ride of discovery to find that out. Meeting the first friend she’s dared to have in years, discovering Bibles locked in a government building, finding out her parents weren’t what she thought they were, and trusting a government soldier with the mission she knows she must do….
Spread the news about Christ to the Outcasts. Lead them to a place the soldier said Christians are in hiding. And don’t die in the process.
But all seems lost when an army is sent to kill them all…..
Well, there it is. is it cliche at all?
I'm a Kapeefer 'TIL WE'RE OLD AND GREY!
www.jennaterese.comoh, here’s a collage too…
I'm a Kapeefer 'TIL WE'RE OLD AND GREY!
www.jennaterese.com@jenwriter17 It sounds really cool!
The only thing cliche I see about it (putting it next to the video on Dystopian novels) is the fact that the main character is a teenage girl
I’m no expert on the Dystopian genre, so I might be worng…
But still, I would read it 😉
You can pronounce it however you want.
@jenwriter17 It sounds neat! I would read it. *nods*
and I was so confused
@jenwriter17 I’m not an expert on dystopia, but it does seem like a fairly classic dystopian story.
An oppressive government (but bonus points for the MC starts off already in rebellion.) A teenage girl MC who is “different” (by virtue of being an Outcast, she is “different”). Parent’s with a Peculiar Past. And I am not sure, but if I had to guess she falls in love with the enemy solider. I don’t see a lot of her personality in the blurb, which leaves me to assume that she is the standard, dystonpian heroine.
That all sounds really negative, but it isn’t all that negative. I do love her voice, and I really like the collage.
@dekreel @notawriter Cool! thanks!
@princessfoo Thanks so much for your input! No, Rin doesn’t fall in love with the soldier guy (his name is Jax). I’d rather not include romance in my novels. They become friends though. Just friends 😊I'm a Kapeefer 'TIL WE'RE OLD AND GREY!
www.jennaterese.com@Jenwriter17 as Princess said, some of the elements are fairly generic with the dystopian genre. Evil government and Outcasts are common features, BUT that doesn’t mean you can’t use it. I definitely say you can still do this well if you have your own aspect and take on the situation and use your own style to make the story unique and different.
Writing Heroes ♦ Writing Hope // janemareeauthor.com.au
@jane-maree Okay, I’ll keep all this in mind 😉
I'm a Kapeefer 'TIL WE'RE OLD AND GREY!
www.jennaterese.com@jenwriter17 It sounds pretty good (I haven’t read any dystopian books, so I can’t really say what’s cliche and what’s not).
That collage is epic. 👍🏻 We actually have a thread devoted to book inspired collages if you have any more. 🙂
@mariposa thanks!
I went ahead and posted my collage on that topic you linked. thank you!
I'm a Kapeefer 'TIL WE'RE OLD AND GREY!
www.jennaterese.comHey! @jenwriter17
First off, love your blurb. And the collage was really cool.
I’m working with a similar WIP, and although it’s a fantasy novel, not a dystopian sci-fi, there are still a lot of cliche-like elements, but here’s the thing: I’m in the rough draft stage right now, so I don’t care if there’s cliches or not. I don’t care at all.
The idea of something being cliche is a complex one, for this reason: sure, something might have been said before, but not by you, and that makes it special. Inevitably, you’ll bring your own style to your story, and that has the potential to make it unique on its own.
And on that note, the entirety of the science-fiction genre comes down to your own worldview. How do you see the world? What would you change about things in our modern world, and what would be the consequences of changing those things? There’s a certain individuality that comes with the sc-fi genre, from so many authors putting their own spin on something that’s been done a thousand times. In my opinion, this does create a kind of variety in its own right, and thus, sci-fi books like the Hunger Games and the Divergent series sell, and will for a while longer.
Writer. Dreamer. Sometimes blogger. MBTI mess. Lover of Jesus and books.
@that_writer_girl_99 thanks!
I really appreciate your advice, Elizabeth 😊
I'm a Kapeefer 'TIL WE'RE OLD AND GREY!
www.jennaterese.comHey everyone! I wrote a few pages of my dystopian novel and I’m just wondering what you all think (note: very rough first draft. this will probably change as I continue to plan out the plot) please excuse typos:
UMA OPENED HER EYES. Everything was blurry, but slowly coming into focus. She was staring at a blank white space. A ceiling. She was lying down. Where was she? Who was she?
A man stepped into her line of vision. He wore a white lab coat and a thin long smile. “How do you feel?
Uma slowly pushed herself into a sitting position. She looked around the room. White walls, white floor, white desks with jumbles of wires and electronics on them. More lab-coated people were in the room, staring at her. Watching. Waiting?
Uma raised a hand to her face. With curiosity she turned it around, studying the smooth skin-like parts and the metallic wire-threaded ones. The man grinned. She didn’t like it when he did that.
“You’re not quite finished yet,” he said. “But you will be……soon.”
Another man joined the first. He didn’t wear a lab coat. “You’re name is Uma,” he said. He folded his hands. “We have something for you to do.”
****
RIN ADACHI SPED DOWN THE HIGHWAY. Her motorcycle gave electric whirrs as she went around the turns. Her nearly blinded her as she glanced back at her pursuers.
Three motorcycles, more high tech than her own, were close behind. The police. Rin wondered why they were after her this time. The only thing she could think of was buying and illegally large soda. But Mack at the fast food place wouldn’t have told on her.
She was nearly there. If she could get over the fence she would be free of these government officers. She turned down an exit and headed towards the edge of the city. Revealing her escape route would have consequences, she knew. But she wasn’t looking forward to spending another night in the hard cement cells at Hamasaki Tower.
Several sharp turns landed her in a dark lit alley. She gained a little ground between her and the officer with her maneuvering, but they hadn’t given up yet. She set her eyes straight ahead. A ramp of wood boards propped against some crates. Perfect to launch her motorcycle over the chain link fence.
She resisted the urge to glance back again and prepared herself. The wheels thudded on the board and she raised herself out of the seat as the cycle flew over the fence. The landing impact jolted her and she blinked to quickly regain her sense again.
The motorcycle skidded to a stop, sending sprays of dirt and grass into the air. Panting hard, she watched the reaction of the officers. They were stopped in front of the fence, staring at her through dark-visor helmets. A moment of silence passed. They revved and turned back down the alley, their tired screeching on the asphalt.
Rin let out a held in breath and ran a hand through her hair. That was close. A bit too close for her liking. Now that they knew how she got her motorcycle out of the city, she knew it most likely wouldn’t be there next time. But she grinned; they didn’t know where she got in.
After she hid the motorcycle in a thick clump of bushes she headed down the cement street of the run down suburbs. Grass and weed poked through cracks and she kicked at a cluster. Why were the police after her again?
It seemed they liked spontaneous chases when she least expected it.
And when she hadn’t even done anything.
That she could remember, anyway.
She continued down the street, hoping she wouldn’t trip over junk in the near darkness. Just three more house now before she reached Taro’s.
She turned onto the broken brick path up towards the house. There would be a meeting going on now, but blackout curtains covered all the windows. She spotted a strip of yellow light in over window. Someone hadn’t fully pulled the curtains closed. Careless. You never knew when an overly confident officer would venture into their territory and find out their activities.
If he didn’t get mugged first.
Rin went to the back door and knocked softly.
A young boy’s voice answered. “Who is it?
“It’s me. Rin.”
“Password?”
She put her hands on her hips. “Oh, come on, Luke. You know it’s me.”
There was a short hesitation. “Oh yeah? How do I know you’re not a government agent mimicking Rin’s voice?”
Luke and his imagination. Rin took a hold on the door knob and let herself in. It wasn’t locked anyway, forgetful kid, and she knew he wouldn’t be able to fight against her pushed against the door.
She stepped into the dim light of a dingy living room. A meeting was going on. Taro was standing at the head of a long marked up table in the middle of the room. With chairs, it didn’t leave much space for walking or standing around. She squeezed behind Taro to sit at his right side. He gave her one of those looks. She tried to grin. Taro’s second-in-command was supposed to be on time.
Taro turned back to the others seated around the table and scrunched against the walls. “And that concludes our meeting.”
What? Rin thought. I was that late?
When most of the people had left, Taro turned to her. “Where were you this time?
“Police were chasing me again.”
Taro squinted his eyes in concern. “Again, huh? What did you do this time?”
Rin crossed her arms. “Nothing. Half the time they’re after me I haven’t done anything.”
Taro went across the room to the small kitchen, dropping the subject. Rin followed, nearly tripping over the peeling yellow vinyl tiles.
He leaned his elbows on the counter. “I need you to do something.”
She leaned her back on the counter across from him. “Okay.”
“A couple government officers are transporting a man from the police station jail to Hamasaki Tower. I want you to free him.” Taro strode over to the curtained window. With a finger he moved it aside a little to peak outside. “Luke and Tony are waiting to go with you.”
“Luke? But he’s only thirteen and he’s never—”
“He needs to learn. Besides, you and Tony are fully capable of taking care of it anyway. He’ll probably just watch.”
Rin headed towards the front door,
“Oh, and Rin?”
She turned around. “Yeah?”
“Don’t’ stop for a soda this time.”
I'm a Kapeefer 'TIL WE'RE OLD AND GREY!
www.jennaterese.comtagging some people so they know @jane-maree @that_writer_girl_99 @dragon-snapper @dekreel @mariposa @daeus @aratrea @the-real-kapeefer
I'm a Kapeefer 'TIL WE'RE OLD AND GREY!
www.jennaterese.com
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