Home Page › Forums › Fiction Writing › Characters › I need help… my character is too withdrawn
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January 23, 2018 at 12:55 pm #61080
I just watched some of @daeus ‘s Show Don’t Tell Course, and am realizing that my character is way too withdrawn, broods too much (even though he recently became a Christian), and is making no new relationships with the people around him. However, I’m at a loss on how to change this. Does anyone have any suggestions for me?
Heir of Splendor
January 23, 2018 at 1:00 pm #61082@bella-d I could answer this, but I’m most interested in what @kate-flournoy would say since I know she’s faced something similar and overcame it.
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January 23, 2018 at 1:04 pm #61084@bella-d I think the first way people learn to make relationships is when someone else forces them out of their shell into a relationship. I know this may seem cliche, but I think the reason it works so well in fiction is because it is like that in real life. I have seen traumatized and withdrawn people who opened up after a lot of patience and love was poured onto them without the expectation of any in return.
If there was a secondary character in your story who decided that against all odds he would help your character, it might take a while, but your character would probably eventually open up to him.
And becoming a Christian doesn’t mean you solve all your problems at once. It just means you have the potential to have your problems solved as you one by one give them to Christ. So it’s perfectly fine if your character still has things wrong with him even though he just became a Christian.
Anyway, those are my thoughts. Hope they help a little. 🙂
"Sylvester - Sylvester!"
January 23, 2018 at 2:17 pm #61111@Bella-D it would appear I have been summoned. Thank you @daeus. 🙂
Let me see… there are a number of potential answers to this question. The one that ended up being the answer for me isn’t so much about changing the side of the character that is reserved, brooding, and unresponsive, but about developing a second side to balance it— the one that, deep down, knows they’re desperately lonely and just wants someone to be their friend.
If the character is defined by his unresponsive brooding in your head, as the author, you can be tempted to never dig any further.
But the truth of writing (and life) is that no one is ever defined by just one trait, however dominant and overwhelming that trait may be. There are always hidden depths, and all humans are contradictory to some extent. Brooding, miserable, emotionally unresponsive characters are probably the ones with the strongest emotional needs and yearnings. They’re just really good at hiding them.
So my suggestion would be, find the part of your character that wants to be loved. That wishes they could crawl out of their miserable hole and spontaneously snatch someone in a hug and never let them go. That stands at the edges of a loud, happy, crowded room and desperately aches for someone to notice them, but is too frightened and miserable to go looking themselves. That huddles in the middle of their bed in the dark and stifles their crying in the quilt while simultaneously hoping with an optimistic desperation that someone will hear them and come to tell them everything will be okay.
When you find this side it will balance out the misery, and work for you as it slowly begins to grow stronger than the miserable side and starts reaching out in response to those that reach out to it.
Is that helpful?
January 23, 2018 at 5:56 pm #61142Thanks, @kate-flournoy and @rochelliane . That all helps a lot! 🙂 There are several characters I have on hand (now that I think of them) who can help pull him up out of his reclusive tendencies. I’m so happy I chose to ask you guys! 😀
Heir of Splendor
January 24, 2018 at 8:03 pm #61281@Bella-D *salutes* Happy to be of service! 🙂
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