Pretty Prose, Please!

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  • #131690
    Esther
    @esther-c
      • Rank: Chosen One
      • Total Posts: 3480

      @godlyfantasy12 @freedomwriter76 @lightoverdarkness6 @mineralizedwritings @princesachronicle22 @felicity @koshka @elishavet-pidyon @kathleenramm @booksbyjayna @keilah-h @loopylin @theloonyone @power @thearcaneaxiom @otherworldlyhistorian @folith-feolin @landric @gwyndalf-the-wise @whalekeeper

      So… I need help.

      I’ve noticed that my prose is lacking. Literally and skillfully. I struggle with writing enough words. I also struggle with transitions, my big writing weakness. Transitions meaning: either moving from one scene to the next, or even moving the characters from one place to another. As in, I just put “They soon reached…; They finally arrived…; Quickly, they ran to…; After a few minutes…; etc, etc.”

      I also tend to either rush on my descriptions or they not be there at all. Sometimes, I imagine things in my head, but they don’t quite come out in words the way I want them to.

      So any tips on how to lengthen and strengthen my prose?

      (I hope all the above was clear enough)

      Write what should not be forgotten. — Isabel Allende

      #131694
      TheLoonyOne
      @theloonyone
        • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
        • Total Posts: 446

        @esther-c

        Well… I have pretty much the same problem, so I’ll just wait here for everyone’s advice 😅🤣

        I guess just know that you’re definitely not the only one who struggles with actually writing the words 😐😁

        #131695
        Jayna Baas
        @booksbyjayna
          • Rank: Wise Jester
          • Total Posts: 93

          @esther-c First, keep writing. The more you write, the better you will get.

          Second, read a lot in the genres and writing styles you want to write. The more good writing you read, the more those rhythms of words will stick in your head.

          Third, don’t stress too much over your transitions. Yes, good ones are important, but it’s much better to err on the side of pared-back transitions. Lengthy transitions kill forward momentum. You basically need enough information for readers to follow what’s going on, but not much more.

          Fourth, if a certain area of writing is challenging for you, such as description, look at some of your favorite books and specifically pay attention to how that particular thing is done. That’s one way to learn by example. You can even do exercises of writing a new description using the same sentence structure of a book you like. Also look for writing books and online articles on the topic of the thing you’re trying to learn. I’m guessing there are dozens of books and articles out there on writing great description.

          And don’t give up! Every word you write is a chance to get better. 🙂

          ​Jayna Baas
          Christian Author/Editor
          www.booksbyjayna.com

          #131697
          TheLoonyOne
          @theloonyone
            • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
            • Total Posts: 446

            @esther-c

            I have an idea! So basically keep a journal with you (which I already do, but never use 😐) and whenever you’re sitting somewhere doing nothing describe the area around you. Just practice writing descriptions a lot. Maybe you can describe how you got there to practice transitions. So yeah! An idea😁👍

            (I want to do this now)

            #131705
            Gwyndalf the Wise
            @gwyndalf-the-wise
              • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
              • Total Posts: 404

              @esther-c

              Oof, wish I could help. XD

              I’m really bad at writing transitions from descriptions to actions. Or thoughts to actions in writing format. (the Character Castle being the exception, but that’s not how you write transitions in books…) And I’m bad at writing descriptions anyways. This is actually one of the reasons I’m making my story a graphic novel…it’s easier to draw you what I think something looks like rather than tell you in words, and you don’t have to write transitions between thoughts to action.

              Sorry I couldn’t contribute to the helpfulness.

              "...I did not say to the seed of Jacob, 'Seek Me in vain..."
              (Part of) Isaiah 45:19

              #131719
              Elishavet Elroi
              @elishavet-pidyon
                • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                • Total Posts: 1101

                @esther-c

                Oof. I also have difficulties with this. (I think every author does at some point.)

                I’ll just echo @booksbyjayna and say keep writing and study the authors you want to emulate. I’ve seen it work and will definitely be personally implementing it as much as I can.

                (After all, it’s another excuse to read Prince Caspian again…)

                You have listened to fears, child. Come, let me breathe on you... Are you brave again? -Aslan

                #131727
                MineralizedWritings
                @mineralizedwritings
                  • Rank: Chosen One
                  • Total Posts: 3006

                  @esther-c

                  oh good question!

                  if it’s a large transition in location, I would put it in between chapters. then you dont have to say, “they arrived at the park” you would just start off the chapter with “Ami looked around at the park (describe lighting/colors)”

                  I recently realized how important lighting is in descriptions. I think I realized this as I learn more about drawing, where lighting is always important. Try to think about what the light is doing. Are the shadows long because of the time of day? I like to explain the reflections of light, I mean it’s different in my book because Tauren wears glasses, idk if you have an opportunity to do something like that. I honestly just realized now I do this, but I use light to shoe connections between characters. So like, Lesli’s headlight reflecting off of Tauren’s glasses is a really common description in my book. Anyways, I love lighting and umm went on a bit of a ramble there XD.

                  I would actually never include things like ‘after a few minutes’. Maybe instead describe Ami watching the scenery as they walk (great time to include some inner dialouge about how a character feels, or use the scenery to trigger a flashback)

                  Or, you could start the next chapter with, “Ami felt like they must have walked three miles, her legs were so tired” so you know they walked for a bit, but it doesn’t matter exactly how much.

                  “they soon reached” could also be handled in a similar way. describe how it feels to get to a place, or, if you don’t want to handle the getting there, just make a new chapter and start at the location. I think in between moments like that are great for inner dialogue, if a book doesn’t have down time, I think it’s harder to know what the characters are thinking. You can use a walking scene to illustrate a character is suspicious or has doubt simply by having them think about the journey thus far and say something that might clue the reader in without giving stuff away.

                   

                  Hope that helps! 🙂

                  "And so I left this world just as I had entered it. Confused."

                  #131745
                  Esther
                  @esther-c
                    • Rank: Chosen One
                    • Total Posts: 3480

                    @booksbyjayna

                    All that was super helpful!! Thanks so much!! 🙂 🙂


                    @theloonyone

                    That’s a great idea! I’ll have to try that!! Thx!


                    @elishavet-pidyon

                    I’ve seen it work and will definitely be personally implementing it as much as I can.

                    (After all, it’s another excuse to read Prince Caspian again…)

                    Awesome!!

                    XD


                    @gwyndalf-the-wise

                    I’m really bad at writing transitions from descriptions to actions. Or thoughts to actions in writing format. (the Character Castle being the exception, but that’s not how you write transitions in books…) And I’m bad at writing descriptions anyways. This is actually one of the reasons I’m making my story a graphic novel…it’s easier to draw you what I think something looks like rather than tell you in words, and you don’t have to write transitions between thoughts to action.

                    Sorry I couldn’t contribute to the helpfulness.

                    It’s all good. 🙂

                    We can work on perfecting our prose together!! 😁


                    @mineralizedwritings

                    You made some really great points!! Thanks so much!! 😄

                     

                     

                     

                    Write what should not be forgotten. — Isabel Allende

                    #131757
                    Anonymous
                      • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                      • Total Posts: 692

                      @esther-c

                      Great question! This has actually been helpful for me since I only describe the things I absolutely have to. I mostly do dialogue. Anyway, I’ll echo @mineralizedwritings I recommend you don’t write transitions but go in between chapters. That’s what I tend to do. I have yet to figure out my style. I’ve been trying to read articles on style and such but haven’t written enough to figure mine out yet. I know that I do much better writing in 1st person instead of third person but that’s as far as I’ve gotten.

                      #131761
                      Jayna Baas
                      @booksbyjayna
                        • Rank: Wise Jester
                        • Total Posts: 93

                        @esther-c I’m glad it was helpful. One thing I forgot to mention—when you write descriptions, focus on evoking an emotion rather than just narrating details. You can often do this with simile or metaphor. For instance, compare “He was a little weasel of a man” with “He was thin and not very tall, and his face looked pointy and kind of sneaky.” This goes for settings and scenery too.

                        ​Jayna Baas
                        Christian Author/Editor
                        www.booksbyjayna.com

                        #131772
                        Keilah H.
                        @keilah-h
                          • Rank: Chosen One
                          • Total Posts: 5035

                          @esther-c I honestly don’t have much to add other than what the others have already said–study how books you like do it.

                          @everyone else You’re helping ME with this advice……thanks!

                          Where'd I get ya this time? The liver? The kidney? I'm runnin' outta places to put holes in ya.

                          #131801
                          Esther
                          @esther-c
                            • Rank: Chosen One
                            • Total Posts: 3480

                            @sarafini

                            Ok, thx!

                            I have yet to figure out my style. I’ve been trying to read articles on style and such but haven’t written enough to figure mine out yet. I know that I do much better writing in 1st person instead of third person but that’s as far as I’ve gotten.

                            Yeah. In all honesty, I still need to figure out my style as well. Like, my older brother has said that he can tell I wrote something, but then, he knows me really well. I think I need to make sure though that my different POV charries have distinct voices.


                            @booksbyjayna

                            One thing I forgot to mention—when you write descriptions, focus on evoking an emotion rather than just narrating details. You can often do this with simile or metaphor. For instance, compare “He was a little weasel of a man” with “He was thin and not very tall, and his face looked pointy and kind of sneaky.” This goes for settings and scenery too.

                            Gotcha 👍


                            @keilah-h

                            I honestly don’t have much to add other than what the others have already said–study how books you like do it.

                            Yep! 🙂

                             

                            Write what should not be forgotten. — Isabel Allende

                            #131840
                            Felicity
                            @felicity
                              • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                              • Total Posts: 812

                              @esther-c

                              I’m a crazy imaginative person….and something I’ve found that helps me write transition/description is picturing the scene in my mind. Then I choose one or two things about the scene that make is unique and focus on those.

                              For instance, if I’m describing a park, I’ll point out the bright orange swing set, or the tens of squirrels that are everywhere. (something that makes it stand out from every other park.)

                              *whispers* Listen to Jayna. She’s got some great advice. *writing down notes of what she said* 😉

                              He must increase, but I must decrease.

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