Writing a Fight Scene

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  • #54142
    0-0Enyali0-0
    @0-0enyali0-0
      • Rank: Charismatic Rebel
      • Total Posts: 32

      Hello, my fellow writers! 😀

      I had a question. I’m working on a novel right now for Nanowrimo (Shadow’s Haven) and I just finished writing a battle scene (ya know, swords, guns, fists, everything of the sort). However, while writing scenes like that, I tend to get confused with my own writing! When I read over it, it sounds like I didn’t put enough action in it. When I glance over it it seems so boring. Also, I overuse a lot of battle words. How can I make it so that the reader feels intense while reading it and can follow it easily? I know it’s all in imagination, but it’s kinda hard for me to picture the scene and write it down…

      ANYWAYS thank ya’ll!

      ISFJ, energetic, writer-crazy, and has-an-unstoppable-obsession-with-The-Aetherlight!

      #54145
      Joy
      @dekreel
        • Rank: Chosen One
        • Total Posts: 2304

        @0-0enyali0-0  Oooh! That’s a good question! Others might have better answers than me, but let me try…

        So it sounds to me like you’re describing every detail of what’s going on in the battle by itself. That tends to sound like a school lecture if you describe a dramatic scene from the outside without looking at how the characters are feeling in the inside. To give it more depth and make it more interesting, you could focus on the main character (or the main-est character in the fight – whoever the story is about at the time). If it’s about more than one, maybe emphasize the teamwork? Hmmm… Wait I’m losing it…

        Instead of saying, “He swished his sword and killed five trolls, then jumped back to dodge an arrow,” (This is just an example) You could say, “With all the energy he could muster from his tired body, he swung his sword loosely into a line of five trolls, and recovered his balance just in time to dodge an oncoming flying arrow.”  That makes it more personal, and you can feel what he’s feeling more easily and more freely.

        That’s the best advice I can give you: Focus on the characters AND the fight. Again, other people might give better answers — I’m pretty inexperienced with fights. But I am experienced with characters.

        Let me tag some people for you.

        Hey, y’all! Can you help Enyali?


        @daeus
          @aratrea  @jane-maree  @seekjustice  @sam-kowal  @dragon-snapper  @kate-flournoy

        You can pronounce it however you want.

        #54148
        0-0Enyali0-0
        @0-0enyali0-0
          • Rank: Charismatic Rebel
          • Total Posts: 32

          @dekreel That’s really great advice, thank you so much. You nailed it, girl!!

          ISFJ, energetic, writer-crazy, and has-an-unstoppable-obsession-with-The-Aetherlight!

          #54152
          Joy
          @dekreel
            • Rank: Chosen One
            • Total Posts: 2304

            @0-0enyali0-0 Did I?? Oh, well, thank you! And you’re welcome! 😉

            You can pronounce it however you want.

            #54168
            Daeus
            @daeus
              • Rank: Chosen One
              • Total Posts: 4238

              @0-0enyali0-0 @dekreel’s advice is very solid. Maybe if you have a fight scene that isn’t too long you could post it here for critique.

              🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢

              #54170
              SeekJustice
              @seekjustice
                • Rank: Chosen One
                • Total Posts: 3365

                @dekreel gave you some really great advice. The key to a good fight scene is making us care what happens. If you’re just writing an essay on who killed who or how this guy punches that one, we aren’t going to care. So Dekreel’s right, put emotion and depth into it. Show us what the MC is feeling and thinking, how do they cope with the battle?

                I hope that’s helpful, good luck with your fight scene!

                INFP Queen of the Kingdom commander of an army of origami cranes and a sabre from Babylon.

                #54178
                Jane Maree
                @jane-maree
                  • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                  • Total Posts: 909

                  @0-0enyali0-0 As Dekreel said, focus on the characters rather than the fight and that’ll make the scene that much better.

                  I can’t recommend research enough. Learn as much as you possibly can about the method of fighting that you’re using. The more you know, the easier the fight scenes will become to write.

                  Writing Heroes ♦ Writing Hope // janemareeauthor.com.au

                  0-0Enyali0-0
                  @0-0enyali0-0
                    • Rank: Charismatic Rebel
                    • Total Posts: 32

                    @daeus Hm, it’s a bit long. I’ll try to see if I can cut a couple parts out of it later….


                    @seekjustice
                    Mm. I agree. It’s kinda hard though because throughout the battle I don’t just focus on one character, it’s more like I keep switching to different people throughout it. Plus, the “main” character that I focus mostly on is kinda an awkward fellow (like me, heh heh heh) and I’ve never been in a battle before. I mean, I know your heart’s beating fast, you’re constantly looking around and trying to best your opponent, etc., but I feel like if I did write emotion it wouldn’t sound real…?


                    @jane-maree
                    I have read a couple books with battles in them, I’ll have to pull them out of my shelf, haha…. RESEARCH TIME!!

                    ISFJ, energetic, writer-crazy, and has-an-unstoppable-obsession-with-The-Aetherlight!

                    #54478
                    SeekJustice
                    @seekjustice
                      • Rank: Chosen One
                      • Total Posts: 3365

                      @0-0enyali0-0 you might not have ever been in a battle before, but you’ve been scared before, haven’t you? You have probably been in a situation that made you tense and anxious. Fear is fear, no matter what causes it, and you’ve felt fear, so you’re just as qualified to write about it as anyone else. 😀

                      INFP Queen of the Kingdom commander of an army of origami cranes and a sabre from Babylon.

                      #54501
                      0-0Enyali0-0
                      @0-0enyali0-0
                        • Rank: Charismatic Rebel
                        • Total Posts: 32

                        @seekjustice I never thought of it that way. I guess I am! Thank you so much for your help! 😀

                        ISFJ, energetic, writer-crazy, and has-an-unstoppable-obsession-with-The-Aetherlight!

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