April 6, 2017 at 3:22 pm #29549
And now, the moment you all have been waiting for! The tale of King Daeus and the Knights of Keeper is here!
This story originated from a writing dare that @emma-flournoy gave me a few months ago, and was supposed to be a comedy about a dragon who melt chairs. Nevertheless, my comedy transformed into this, and you all can be the judge of the genre. It’s meant to be fun, but if you have any comments, edits, critiques, I’m open to them. I give you *drumroll*
The Legend of King Daeus by Dragon Snapper.
The Legend of KeePer
Late one night…
Princess Emma of Castle Rengis paced before the hearth. Her shoes tapped the stone floor, and her hands she clenched tightly until her knuckles turned white. Nervousness was thick in the room. The fire did nothing to help that awful chill.
Kate should be back by now…she thought, picking up the letter her sister had sent weeks earlier. Kate had defeated the dragon as the King had commanded, but there was some delay. The dragon den had only been a week away, yet she’d been gone four weeks.
“Something’s wrong,” she mumbled, looking to the king. He sat on the other side of the oaken table, munching on a cluster of grapes and raspberries, crown crooked and cape wrinkled. It was the middle of the night.
“Don’t worry about it. Kate, your sister, is a professional knight. She wouldn’t let herself get hurt,” he said. Of course, he could be wrong, and he knew it. But why admit that to an already worried resident?
Still, she shook her head, and continued pacing. Something had gone wrong. Terribly wrong. Then she stopped in her tracks and stared at the king. “What if she’s been captured by goblins? Thray’s men? Troll things? What if she’s twisted her ankle?”
This time Daeus looked at the princess with raised eyebrows. Now she was just overreacting. “Any of those are possible, but not likely. She wouldn’t let herself go down like that.”
“You keep saying that she wouldn’t let it happen, but she can’t control that.”
“Then I won’t let it happen. I won’t allow her to get hurt while I am king,” and in saying so, he munched another raspberry.
Emma groaned. “But wouldn’t you be worried if your sister Kina was lost for weeks upon weeks?”
“What about your sister Kina?”
The two turned, and out of the dark halls came Kina, a lit candle in her hands.
“Shouldn’t you be in bed?” he asked, having no thought to order her around.
“You aren’t,” Kina replied, taking a seat at the table. “You guys alright?”
“Fine.” Emma was still pacing.
“She’s worried,” Daeus said.
“About the knight?”
Emma stopped and pulled out a chair of her own. “Kate should’ve been back from that quest a week ago,” she answered, toying with the letter again.
“Maybe she’s visiting the elves,” Kina suggested.
“She’d have at least sent a falcon,” Emma scowled. “No. There’s something more at hand. I just wish I knew what it was.”
Given that the noises shook the castle, the three rushed to their feet, swords drawn. “What was that?” Daeus asked subsequently. For a moment, silence reigned.
CHING! CHING! CHING!
“The drawbridge!” they exclaimed.
Realization dawned on them and they dashed to the courtyard. They reached in time to see the iron bars being drawn up. The gate creaked open, and a silhouetted form limped towards the courtyard. Moonlight glinted off the figure, glimmering on the dark hair of the Knight. All of Daeus’ fears were realized. He had gotten her into this.
“Kate!” Kina cried, beginning the run for her. Daeus outran her, and Emma outran Daeus.
“Kate! Kate? Are you alright?” Emma queried.
Finally, she looked up at them and grinned tiredly. There was a small scrape on her left cheek, and her clothes were in tatters. In addition, her hair was scorched and there was a fine layer of ash over her cloak. The armor would need to be replaced.
“Never been better.”
“Why? What happened?” Daeus asked.
Kate glanced at him sideways. Either she hadn’t said ‘never been better’ like she intended, or she’d entered an alternate universe where opposite’s day reigned.
They led her to a close-by bench, where she gladly sat. Her satchel was stuffed, but she set it down gently. “Dragons happened,” she answered, slipping a useless boot off her foot.
The king felt a wave of guilt crash over his head. “But the scouts—” he stopped. There was no use in blaming others for his own fault. “I was sure there was only one dragon in that den. Two at the least!”
Kina glanced at him. He wasn’t acting right. Usually, he’d be telling Kate to refresh herself with ice cream and that she’d done a job well done.
“Ha!” Kate laughed a little laugh. “Oh, there was only one dragon. And I bested it. Trust me, your Majesty, the castle is safe.”
“Then what’s the problem?” Emma pushed.
Holding up the satchel to the king, Kate said, “These are the problem.”
Daeus had to compensate for his sudden lack of necessary strength. The bag was a lot heavier than he’d thought. “What on earth?”
The other two crowded around the bag. “Careful,” Kate muttered. “They won’t die if you drop them. But they won’t be happy.”
“What on earth?” he said again. Then curiosity overtook him. He flipped open the cover. “Leaves of Yggdrasil!” he gasped and remembered only at the last second not to drop the bag.
Two little dragon heads popped out and examined the surprised faces. They were both considerably tiny, no bigger than a water canteen.
He may have been confident of Kate’s health earlier, but now he was concerned that she had been hit one too many times on the head. “Kate…what have you done?”
The other two girls stared in a wordless wonder at the knight. Pet dragons? It was all awesomeness to them!
“Don’t say anything just yet. It’s a longer story than you might think.”
“Then, please start before I go eat two gallons of ice cream,” Daeus growled. If Kate had any idea of what she had brought here, she’d be much more apologetic.
Emma said, “Can’t we just hear her out?” Kina nodded to that. Her brother would never eat two gallons of ice cream.
When Daeus didn’t say anything, Kate gestured at the bag. “Close the top so they don’t escape.” Daeus did so.
“I did as you ordered, but when I drove the other dragon out, there were these two eggs. Not big. About the size of my hand.”
Daeus thought about that for a minute. “These two…things…are much bigger than my hands,” he pointed out.
“They grow,” she explained. “I figured that we could use them against Thray. If they trained from now they could be powerful weapons. The problem with all the other dragons is that they are wild and have grown up in the wild. These two could be raised here and be the first domesticated dragons.”
Now it was Daeus’ turn to shake his head and look to the starry skies. What had he done to deserve this?
“Kate, Thray has spies everywhere. If he heard of these dragons, then he’d have no problem in doing the same. Not to mention I can’t have dragons flying around the castle and scaring the residents! The castle is supposed to be a haven for those who have none, and bringing on dragons is bound to change that reputation.”
“I couldn’t just leave them to die!” Kate protested. “Look, if you won’t take them in, I will, and you’ll be out a knight.
That was a hitting point. “I’m going to regret this, aren’t I?”
Everyone cast their hopeful eyes to him.
“That means you have to take care of them, Kate! I’m serious. I will not have anything to do with them. You train them for battle and keep they on a bit less of the wild side. You look terrible as it is.”
“It’s just a scratch,” Kate grinned and took her two companions. “Come on, girls. We have some work to do.”
Emma followed her sister, as happy as the sunshine, but Kina lingered beside her brother.
“I don’t like dragons,” he grumbled, tapping his toe impatiently against the floor.
“Kate just survived a four week trek in the wild with two baby dragons. All you did was scold her.”
“Who’s scolding who?” Daeus muttered, but his sister was right. “Kate!” he called out.
“What are their names? The dragons’?”
Kate smiled, “Aviur and Kai.”
Daeus’ façade melted into a frown. Was he mistaken, or did both of those names mean ‘fire’?
Cadets and knights filled much of the courtyard, facing off with swords and battle-weapons. Preparing for war, they had every right to be as intimidating as a junk of trolls. However, no battle-cry or shout or swing of a sword could compare to the Knight Kate, who had each cadet cowering beneath shields.
“What do you think you are? Kittens?” Kate cried, marching to and from amongst the young adults. But she had hardly given them enough credit. A griffon would’ve turned tail and run from a mile away if it had seen the military students.
She walked over to one particular duo. They were star students, but there was always room for improvement. “Cadets!”
The girl’s blonde hair nearly smacked Kate in the face as she twirled around. Already expecting the sting of a sword, Kate parried the cadet’s already drawn sword. “How’s training?”
“It’s…training,” she responded with a shrug. “When training for war, this is about as exciting as it gets.”
Kate nodded. She understood entirely. “Show me what you’ve got.”
“By that I mean ‘fight’.”
The cadets turned to face each other. Snapper gestured for her opponent to start the fight.
“Olde!” he cried, then paused, mace facing down. “Or was it Oldie? Start? Commence? No…”
Snapper rolled her eyes. Her partner had come down with the rare disease which symptoms were mainly not being able to find the right word. Pretty much every one had that disease. It was known as WORDLOSSTICS.
Finally finding the right word, they commenced. He swung his mace and she dove beneath it, the weight of the metal pulling the cadet with it. Snapper, now having the upper hand swung her sword into the air, but her opponent rolled and tripped her to the ground. Then, dropping his mace, he pinned her to the dirt.
“I win!” he said.
Snapper bared her teeth, but said nothing. Pushing her rival off, she looked to the darkening sky. “Gray?”
“Impressive,” Kate said. “But I doubt that the troll things would be very intimidated by the word ‘gray’. ”
The fight may have been over, and her partner had stood, but Snapper stayed glued to the ground. “Knight Kate. Um…”
“Do you mind getting up? I can’t see you too well when you’re down there.”
“Look,” the grounded cadet pointed skyward.
“Up, up, up. We have training to do.”
Snapper’s muscles clenched as she forced herself to stand. “Knight—”
“Fight again! This time, keep in mind that it’s not a wrestling match,” Kate said and took a step back to allow them space. “Alright. Now fi—”
“Knight Kate!” A cadet came running and huffing.
“Oh, for Pete’s sake, what?”
“Fire, to the east!”
Kate looked, rather belatedly, to the skies. “Oh, Yggdrasil.” She muttered. Thray was on the move.
Knights surrounded the table, kneading their fists into the oak as they stared at maps and battle-tactics and the king. The cadets stood by, casting worried glances to the east. The king himself studied the flickering tongues of the hearth. If Thray managed to burn down much more of the forests, his advantage would be left to the dust and ash.
He clenched his fists, “We waited too long.”
“Yup.” Kate walked over to him. “We sure did.”
Daeus glanced at her. He knew the war was coming. She knew. They all knew. If he didn’t come up with some way to keep Thray at bay, they were doomed.
Leverage…I need leverage. Daeus considered his options. What leverage? “Does anyone have any ideas? I’m open to them.”
For the most part, no one spoke. They avoided his eyes, the bearing weight of his gaze. “Ideas, people. They’re important.”
Kate spoke up, shattering the silence. “No. We can’t stand up to a force of that many troll things without an advantage point. He has us surrounded by a burning forest. If he doesn’t scare us out, he will smoke us out.”
“Great,” was all Daeus had to say about that.
The Knights continued with the staring contest that silence left in its wake. But the stillness of it all was soon broken.
Hands went to swords as the doors were wrenched open, nearly slamming a few knights in the movement. Although startled, they all glared at the man who had intruded. Then, just as they had merely caught a glimpse of a bearded man and green frog, the doors bounced back on their hinges. As quickly as he had appeared, so had the Kaslammer disappeared.
“Who…?” Kina muttered.
The doors burst open, and this time the man walked through, the frog placed upon his head. All eyes rested on him. They all knew who he was. The Wiser. Josiah Degrande had come.
While glad that help had arrived, Daeus remembered the Wiser all too well. “You.”
Beard sweeping the floor, the Wiser tapped his way over to the king. He did not bow, not in the slightest. Maybe that was because his back was already bent over, hand on a wooden cane.
“Aye, it is me. Who did you think it was?”
“Oh, I don’t know… An old man who has the knack to be annoying in times of crisis,” Daeus said, rather philosophically. “Other than that, I have no idea who you are.”
“Amusing,” Degrande grinned. “Raspberry?”
Wherever his love of raspberries disappeared to in that moment, Daeus didn’t know. He glanced at the raspberry in disgust. Did he get that from his beard? Was it a magic raspberry? “No thanks…” then he shook off his doubt. “What are you doing here?”
“Standing. Talking. Wondering where the welcome is, old friend.”
“You’re nearly four times older than I am, and none the wiser!” Daeus replied. Degrande could indeed help him, but there was a problem. “You only ever show up to tell me things I don’t want to hear!”
Although offended by the wiser comment, Josiah held his own. Face deadpan, he turned his gaze to his frog who had hopped to the table upon their entrance. “Only one other person has rejected my help…” he drifted off.
Daeus glanced at the frog. The green thing was either giving him a sanguine smile or a warning grimace. He didn’t trust either of those expressions. “Is that a threat? Are you going to turn me into a frog?”
The Wiser simply shrugged. Daeus glanced at Kate, who only looked to the east. Bad reminder. Despite every voice in his head telling him to arrest the Wiser, to get rid of him, to humiliate him, Daeus restrained himself. He had been offered raspberries…that was something.
The king clenched his fists, giving place to the steam. Having cooled off to lesser than the boiling point of water, he pivoted so that Josiah could not see the cloud of anger.
“As you can see, I’m very busy with this predicament…sooo, goodbye.”
Everyone glared at him. They needed Josiah, Daeus knew that. He wouldn’t be king without him. Beyond that, though, did he really need Josiah? He fumbled with the dog-earing maps…banishing would be so easy.
Daeus nearly jumped. Did the Wiser just…read his mind? Sorcery was a qualifying point for banishment. He had to moderate this kingdom somehow. But just to make certain. “What did you say?”
“Yes, I can see you’re busy. This predicament has an easy fix though, one you have failed to think of. Or at least, failed to mention. To evaluate.” Josiah stroked his gray beard. Daeus despised that beard. It was like a giant tarantula. Creepy. Crazy. Coarse.
Again, the king glanced at his map, but he wasn’t really examining it. Far from it. “I was just about to say my grand idea when you interrupted. You have my undying thanks.”
Frog now perched on his shoulder, the Wiser made his way over to the table, “What is this plan that you are longing to tell us?”
Granted, no one enjoyed how much pressure the Wiser had managed to accumulate upon the king. A picture of a giant cauldron with a brewing mix of green sludge inserted itself into their minds, an argument was reaching a boil. “I never said plan…I said it was an idea. Now, stop distracting me. What are you doing here?”
Josiah glanced Eastwards. “You have a lovely view of the smoke.”
The cauldron boiled over, and everyone took a step away from the oozing green mess that exploded just then.
“Enough!” Daeus slammed his map onto the table. “You have entered my war room unannounced. You have threatened me! You have brought in a green hopper and moldy raspberries, which is the biggest crime, really. You pretend like you know everything. How to fix my kingdom. How I should act. How I should rule. You are NOT king! How you managed to get past my guards escapes me, but I only ask you one thing! What annoying piece of advice do you want to give me!”
Perhaps as a precaution, a hush ruled over the war room. Kate scratched her forehead, or maybe that was a face palm. Cadets bit their lips, clenched their sword, or stomped their feet to vent the itches of stress.
Eventually, the Wiser spoke, “Thray is not five miles from your kingdom. He is burning down forests. Harassing villages, elves, dwarves, all the creatures of your kingdom. Cadet’s aren’t ready to fight. Troll things multiply as we sit idle. He outranks your army ten to one, but you still have the advantage. Yet we argue.”
However huge the amount of frustration contracted, the king only muttered, “What would you have me do?”
Kate’s head shot up. “What did you say?”
There was a silence as Daeus glared holes into Josiah. A frog croaked. A pin dropped and everyone knew it.
“Dragons, your Majesty. You must use the dragons!”
The king’s fingers now itched to throw something. “What?! The dragons!”
“Aviur and Kai. Kate has been training them for almost a year now, hasn’t she?” the Wiser wondered, gesturing at the captain.
“I have,” she confirmed. “Either way, the king is not happy about it.”
“That’s a granted,” someone said. It was Snapper, as they found out. She was shushed presently.
Daeus looked at Josiah with that look of disgust that showed up when dragons were mentioned. “No, that’s not an option.”
Now, the Wiser became zealous. His palms pressed against the table, he said, “Think about it. Your enemies demolished. Thray no longer a threat. Your cadets’, knights’ lives, spared! You could regain your foothold, and defeat your enemies with one swift stroke!”
“I did think about it! I’ve thought about it every night since Kate brought in those dragons! I’ve watched them in training, and the wild fire has not ever left their eyes. You can take dragons out of the wild, but the wild will never leave them. To use them would be ruinous, especially if my knights cannot control them.”
Despite his volley of suggested ‘NO’s, Kate protested, “Please reconsider! The dragons—”
“—are not ready!” Daeus imperatively announced, “No. This is one area that I will NOT be moved. As king of this country, as protector of my people, I am standing my ground.”
“That’s nice, but you’re absolutely wrong.”
Heads turned. Students stepped to the side. They did not want to be identified with Cadet Snapper at that moment.
Loyalty. Something that they all seemed to lack in that moment they stepped away from her. The cadet cast her eyes back to the king. As her fellow cadets had removed themselves from the equation, Snapper was now a red cloth to a bull. Finally, Daeus said, “What?”
“I said that you’re wrong.”
Hoping that somehow the cadet wouldn’t be so foolish, or was joking, or he had broken ears, the king shut his eyes and muttered, “That has to be the first time someone has ventured to say I was wrong.”
Snapper shrugged, as if it was no big deal that she was in line for a prison cell. “Out loud, at least. Not everyone agrees with everything you have to say. Here, I’m simply voicing my opinion.”
She’s gone nuts, Daeus thought. “Are you aware how bold it is to say so?”
“Of course, it’s not as if I called you a vulture-troll hybrid. Or a worm. Or a coward in each and every aspect in that you fail to protect your country as your personal fear of dragons gets in the way.”
Storming over to the cadet, the king brought himself up to his full height. “I am not a vulture or a troll! I am a king, and it’s about time you started acting as if I was one!
Now Snapper squinted at the king in anger. “I never called you either of those insults! They were suggested! However, you are a coward and I will not kneel to a king who has no sense of honor. Use the dragons!”
That in itself had gone too far. The king was severely insulted. And in a mess of problems. A rogue cadet and Degrande and dragons. “No.”
The cadet’s young face twisted with frustration. “Oh, you are so stubborn!” she stepped to the doors, prying them open. “If you won’t use the dragons, then I will!” And she took off, her cloak a flash of lightning. Gone.
Daeus’ own reaction was immediate. “Arrest her! Do not let her get to the dragons!”
The knights dashed off, as well as cadets. Thus, Daeus was left alone with the Wiser. “Thanks for putting that idea in her head.”
Degrande grinned. He had hoped this would happen. The kingdom was saved. He was content. “My pleasure. Now your forces are split in a time of crisis. You only have Kate.”
“I’ll enjoy this predicament to its full extent,” Daeus rolled his eyes.
Beneath them a commotion shook the floor, and the king hurried to the Eastern window. Two black specks marred the smoke. Snapper had unleashed the dragons. In fact, he wouldn’t have been surprised if she were on the dragons.
“Congratulations, Wise One, you’ve destroyed my country,” Daeus grumbled, but seeing no Wise One when he turned. Only a green hopper. A frog. In its hand was an ice cream cone. Chocolate flavored, he noticed. He was certain that the frog was grinning evilly.
The king licked away at the ice cream, ignoring the brain freeze and waiting for the Knight’s report.
Kate stopped outside of the large doors to the war room. Why was it that there was always some sort of hidden force that held people’s hands back from knocking? Her fist was stuck midair, and she thought back to every book she had read before. Great. Now she was living a cliché.
Wait…no one ever said that her fists had to knock. She pounded on the door with her steel boots. “The Knight Kate to report.”
After hardly any wait, the door opened to reveal the king’s bewildered face. “Why is your fist glued to the air?”
The head knight struck a confused face, “I don’t really know. It’s as if there’s some unknown force holding me back from knocking a door.”
“Huh. Well, it’s not as if I’d scream or yell at you or anything. I had ice cream, so I guess I’m feeling a bit better.” The king walked back to the table. “Maybe I should’ve had ice cream earlier.” He shrugged. “I’m assuming that since you’re here alone that she got away.”
“Yeah. Along with the dragons. She likely reached Thray by now.”
“She’s likely going to get herself killed soon. C’mon. Let’s go,” Daeus grumbled, pulling his cloak over his shoulders.
“Mount the army. We’re going to fight Thray with the window she’s giving us. We’re the KeePers. We keep each other. I may have been blind before, but any amount of bravery that has been revealed to me charges up the fires of battle. We will fight to stand our ground. For the kingdom!”
As they walked to the armory, Daeus couldn’t help but say, “You know, Kate? That would’ve been much more dramatic if we’d been on the battle-field with an orchestra.”
Thray’s camp was about as dark as his name sounded. The soil was trodden ash, crushed into black sand and rolled into marble stones. As the troll things slept within the dust bunnies of their own matted fur, there was only one tent. Thray’s, by the looks and logics of things. Being opposite of the Kingdom, it was red and black, pillared by tent stilts parading the dark lord’s flag: a scorpion with fire in its mouth. Despite its intended purpose, Snapper was not frightened.
She rode around with the dragons, comfortable on their scales. “Thray’s going to need to get a new flag. Not scary enough. Not half as intimidating as dragons.”
Of course, she couldn’t leave the tent simply standing there. No, if Thray did manage to survive the approaching doom, then his tent would be imperative to him. That in mind, the tent was burned by dragon fire within seconds.
“Alright, you two. Head towards the forests, and we’ll just add to the havoc. Ready to wreak?”
Troll things littered the Once-A-Forest grounds, torches and pitchforks in their hands. Even though a few held rustic axes, Snapper couldn’t help but wish that Thray had given them better weapons. Then again, they had hands the size of shields.
Thray himself sat atop a black steed behind his ranks, straight-backed and arrogant. Snapper rolled her eyes, “He’s been behind the forest for too long. Thinks he’s so strong. Is he? You show him the answer.”
Aviur and Kai roared and spun through the air, fire preceding them. Troll things dropped where they stood, rolled into balls, ran off, or even tried to jump onto the dragons. Troll things could jump high. But never high enough.
When aware his lines were under fire, Thray whipped his head round and round, trying to find the attackers, then he saw dragons. And he knew he was beaten. Fiddle crumbs.
Ashes dropped from the skies, marring the truth that stood a foot ahead of the knights. The king walked through the maze of fallen troll things. There were hundreds of them, but no dragons. No…Snapper. Now what? Had she been captured? Killed? The troll things may not have been known by their looks, but their throwing skills were renowned. Axes scattered the grounds.
Daeus had come to despise this worry monster. “Snapper! Snapper! Thray?!”
“I don’t see anyone,” Kate shook her head. “You don’t think…” She drifted off.
“Don’t think what, that they sat and had tea? No, I don’t think that. They’re probably eating scones with chocolate and having the time of their lives…without me.”
Shaking her head, Kate said, “Such a shame.”
Kina moved forward. “Might as well find them before they eat it all.”
They dispersed, kicking up dust, and squinting for a dragon or two. Neighboring the burnt forest, these knights searched. Daeus never let his gaze waver. If he had just used the dragons in the first place, he might not be in this mess! “Literally, a mess.”
Then he saw a blur. A blur! That meant everything! No, but as he marched closer, with newfound determination, the picture shifted to be a huge snarling dragons, sitting atop Thray. Snapper stood aside, glaring at the traitor. And Daeus’ world lit up when he saw Thray begrudgingly sign the agreement of surrender. Then again, who wouldn’t?
“To the cadets, in honor and recognition of your bravery to face the unknown, I dub each of you Knights of the Bestistest Place of the KeePer Lands. My people, I give you the Knights! Thank you for your service to your country. May your pen be mightier than your swords, and may paper airplanes not be the cause of your downfall.”
The Knights applauded, more than ready to congratulate their cadets for their accolades. Each of the cadets stepped back, and everyone was given ice cream and chocolate. King Daeus took one for himself and sat back on his throne, cape splayed out beneath him like a lily pad beneath a frog. The frown tugging at his lips was heavier than the crown on his head, as he tapped his tongue against the ice cream. There he sat, staring at his dancing, laughing people.
Then he jumped, nearly dropping his ice cream as a voice said from behind, “You look like you’ve eaten moldy ice cream, but your enemies are defeated. You’re welcome?”
“I…lost my appetite for ice cream just now. That’s all,” Daeus dropped the ice cream in the garbage. Why did Degrande have make such analogies? “And thank you, I’m fine.”
“No, you’re not. What’s up?”
“Thray. He’s in the dungeon, but I can’t get him out of my mind.”
“Go talk to him.”
Daeus opened his mouth to reply, but then thought better of it. Maybe that was a good idea. So without further ado, he bit a piece out of his chocolate and marched to the dungeons.
They stood staring at each other for a while, either wondering how each other had gotten so old, or how each of them had become greater opposites. The disgust they felt for each other had grown from years of no communication.
Eventually, the King said, “Do you have anything to say for yourself?”
Thray’s eyes grew big, then he shrugged and grinned. “I like your dragons.”
*melts chair*April 6, 2017 at 3:24 pm #29550April 6, 2017 at 4:11 pm #29552
Jenni Grace W.
- Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
- Total Posts: 877
@dragon-snapper OH. MY. GOODNESS. This is absolutely hilarious!!! 😂😂😂 I salute you Cadet Snapper! Argh, my face hurts from laughing…..ice cream…dragons…..oh, my. I’m gonna laugh till I cry in a corner now. ;D
*is probably geeking out about something*April 6, 2017 at 4:14 pm #29553
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 This is bestistest!
🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢April 6, 2017 at 4:33 pm #29554
- Rank: Chosen One
- Total Posts: 3912
@dragon-snapper I have literally been laughing so hard I can barely read this. HILARIOUS DOES NOT DO IT JUSTICE. Owwwww… *wipes eyes* I love this too much. Excellent job with the characterization, though you made me out much braver than I’ll ever be. *splits face grinning**wipes eyes again*
Oh man… this is perfect.April 6, 2017 at 4:38 pm #29556
Ok, this was my favorite line: 😛
“Don’t think what, that they sat and had tea? No, I don’t think that. They’re probably eating scones with chocolate and having the time of their lives…without me.”
🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢April 6, 2017 at 4:52 pm #29560
- Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
- Total Posts: 942
@dragon-snapper I’ve been waiting my entire KP life for someone to do something like this. *bestows Elven blessings upon you* SO. FUNNY. Why does it hurt so much?!
https://thesarcasticelf.wordpress.com/April 6, 2017 at 5:02 pm #29561
- Rank: Chosen One
- Total Posts: 3912
My favorite line(s), though there were SO MANY GREAT ONES:
Kate stopped outside of the large doors to the war room. Why was it that there was always some sort of hidden force that held people’s hands back from knocking? Her fist was stuck midair, and she thought back to every book she had read before. Great. Now she was living a cliché.April 6, 2017 at 5:07 pm #29562
- Rank: Loyal Sidekick
- Total Posts: 169
I have read a lot of thing on Kingdom Pen. But this- THIS- wins as my favorite. By far. You win. Everything. *applauds*April 6, 2017 at 5:28 pm #29563
- Rank: Wise Jester
- Total Posts: 84
Best entertainment ever!
And thank you for this line(s):
“We will fight to stand our ground. For the kingdom!”
As they walked to the armory, Daeus couldn’t help but say, “You know, Kate? That would’ve been much more dramatic if we’d been on the battle-field with an orchestra.”April 6, 2017 at 5:32 pm #29566
@anne-swiftblade that was definitely a close second.
🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢April 6, 2017 at 6:05 pm #29570
April 6, 2017 at 6:17 pm #29572
- Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
- Total Posts: 837
- Rank: Loyal Sidekick
- Total Posts: 297
My day has been made. That was…beautiful, absolutely beautiful. I was laughing the entire time. A+ @dragon-snapper
"Sometimes we got to look in the dark to see how bright's the dawn." -A.S. PetersonApril 6, 2017 at 7:23 pm #29576
Wow. Everyone…I don’t know what to say…Just…just…here *hands out ice cream* Thank you!!!!
@graciegirl Yay! I’m so glad you liked it! *salutes you back* What was your favorite line?
@daeus It is the bestistest place on the internet, after all! 😀 And I love that line too. I tried to incorporate your ice cream and scones and raspberries. You weren’t too grumpy, right? 😉
@kate-flournoy Someone had to be the brave one. 😛 And indeed, that line was great to write.
@ethryndal *receives Elven blessings from Gollum* It was so much fun to write. And @emma-flournoy just lives at the castle. 😉
@adry_grace Aw, that means so much to me. Thank you!
@anne-swiftblade Thanks! And yes, I couldn’t leave that out. I listen to so many orchestrations. 😀
@jane-maree King Daeus was awesome, wasn’t he? 😀 Thanks for the points!
@christi-eaton From one writer to another, you just made my day too. *takes A+ and puts it in treasure box* (yes, I have one) 🙂
I shall now tag more people.
@rolena-hatfield @spradlin @writefury @sleepwalkingmk @theliterarycrusader @hope @warrioroftherealm @mark-kamibaya @i-j-anderson @sierra-r @perfectfifths @leumeister @aratrea @winter-rose @his-instrument @audrey-caylin @gretald @bluejay @brandon-miller @ingridrd @overcomer @northerner @aella @that_writer_girl_99
*melts chair*April 6, 2017 at 7:27 pm #29579
All of you are choosing favorite lines but I can’t seem to find any of my own. 😛
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