Sam I am: Doom, Glitter, and Iphones

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  • #26422
    Emma Flournoy
    @emma-flournoy
      • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
      • Total Posts: 1352

      @Winter-Rose XD Poor Martin.

      #32465
      Anonymous
        • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
        • Total Posts: 1486

        @daeus @kate-flournoy @emma-flournoy @dragon-snapper @overcomer @Christi-eaton @R-J-Wordsmith @ingridid @graciegirl @faithdk @anyone else who wants to have a look
        I finished my second Sam story and wanted to share it with you guys. So here it is if you want to take a look 🙂 :
        1st part of Birthday Parties, Balloons, and Fire
        2nd part of Birthday Parties, Balloons, and Fire

        #32551
        Emma Flournoy
        @emma-flournoy
          • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
          • Total Posts: 1352

          @Winter-Rose My heart aches for poor Sam. *groan* Poor, poor guy. XD
          That was great. His POV!
          I did catch several thingies, mostly punctuation errors, while I was reading through; if you want me to tell you them.
          I wonder, did the powdered sugar incident have inspiration from real life? It seems like it would. 😛

          • This reply was modified 6 years, 11 months ago by Emma Flournoy.
          #32553
          Kate Flournoy
          @kate-flournoy
            • Rank: Chosen One
            • Total Posts: 3976

            @Winter-Rose poor guy… *hugs him* Seriously though, you did great. First person pov is not one of my strong points and can be very easy to do typically, but you did great with it. Thanks for sharing. 😀

            Gracie
            @graciegirl
              • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
              • Total Posts: 889

              @Winter-Rose Zikers, I LOVE these stories!!! And I love Sam in all his clumsy, accident-proness. (Who cares that that’s not a word? 😜 ) Thanks so much for putting these here, I was so excited when I saw them!!
              The ending was awesome. Samantha asking about the glitter was perfect!

              *is probably geeking out about something*

              #32566
              Daeus
              @daeus
                • Rank: Chosen One
                • Total Posts: 4238

                @graciegirl Propensity 😉 (though I like proness)

                🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢

                #32569
                Gracie
                @graciegirl
                  • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                  • Total Posts: 889

                  @Daeus Ah! Muchas gracias, señor. 😉

                  *is probably geeking out about something*

                  #32594
                  Anonymous
                    • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                    • Total Posts: 1486

                    @emma-flournoy 🙂 It’s amazing you can catch all those little punctuation errors! I’m not a detail oriented person, so I try my best to see them, but (as you can tell ) I often miss ’em. If you have time and would like to point them out, that would be fantabulous! ( I should hire you as my editor or something. 😉 )
                    No the powdered sugar thing was not something that personally happened to me. I’m not sure where it came from. 😉 🙂

                    @kate-flournoy
                    Thanks for reading! 😀 😀

                    @graciegirl
                    Aww thanks! 🙂 That makes me happy inside. (and I think it’s perfectly acceptable to make up words. Shakespeare did it.) 🙂

                    #32612
                    Emma Flournoy
                    @emma-flournoy
                      • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                      • Total Posts: 1352

                      Ergh, it’s not putting out my edited post…I’ll try again in a minute.

                      #32616
                      Emma Flournoy
                      @emma-flournoy
                        • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                        • Total Posts: 1352

                        No success. I’ll try it in two parts.

                        @Winter-Rose Aw, thanks. 😀 I am a detail oriented person, so that’s probably the difference. (Likely something in the difference between a Perceiver and a Judger. I’m a most definite J. 😉 )
                        Here we are.

                        Part One

                        “Thanks captain obvious,” She retreated to the fridge once again. — period after ‘obvious’

                        details,” She said. — ‘she’

                        Happy Birthday — not a huge deal, but song titles are properly in quotes, not italics.

                        and pored myself a cup. —‘poured’

                        It’s demented, permanent marker smiley face —‘it’s’ = ‘its’

                        Brittany — it was spelled like this once in the first part—the first time it mentioned her I think

                        more pizza,” She said — ‘she’

                        Don’t let me get in your way,” I hastily — period after ‘way’.

                        #32617
                        Emma Flournoy
                        @emma-flournoy
                          • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                          • Total Posts: 1352

                          Part Two

                          It was no nowhere in sight. — it says ‘no nowhere’

                          out you!” My grandpa yelled from the dining room. — ‘My’ = ‘my’

                          Don’t worry, it get’s worse. — ‘get’s’ = ‘gets’

                          throwing open it’s doors — ‘it’s’ = ‘its’

                          My mother want’s me — ‘want’s’ = ‘wants’

                          need to go home,” Liam eased — period after ‘home’

                          the door for you,” Liam stepped out — period after ‘you’

                          you aren’t in trouble,” She started. — ‘She’ = ‘she’

                          her earing f — earring

                          “One moment,” She pried his finger —‘She’ = ‘she’

                          avoided,” She said. — ‘She’ = ‘she’

                          on problem one?” She asked. — ‘She’ = ‘she’

                          As you wish,” She returned to feeding Eli. —period after ‘wish’

                          But mark me,” She wagged her finger at me. “You will tell me,” — ‘She’ = ‘she’ — period after ‘tell me’

                          That’s that. 😀 Have a fantabulous evening. @Winter-Rose

                          #32618
                          Emma Flournoy
                          @emma-flournoy
                            • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                            • Total Posts: 1352

                            Aha, there we go.

                            #32626
                            Anonymous
                              • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                              • Total Posts: 1486

                              @Emma-flournoy Much appreciated! 🙂

                              #32628
                              Emma Flournoy
                              @emma-flournoy
                                • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
                                • Total Posts: 1352

                                @Winter-Rose I’m really glad it’s helpful. 😀

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