My New Fantasy Book Idea and Endeavor

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  • #48749
    Joseph Darkgrate
    @xonos-darkgrate
      • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
      • Total Posts: 162

      Hey guys! I just recently had an idea for a fantasy book. So, I have been reading up on fantasy clichés and other things about how to write a fresh and new story for an otherwise overused story.

      I haven’t started writing yet, as I don’t want to rush in and make so many story mistakes that I have to start over later. So I’m using this time to learn more about how to make the best fantasy novel possible at this point.

      Here’s a brief overview of it:
      It’s a bit like Harry Potter in the sense that it’s about wizards and “magic”. (which I have been reading up on as well). The main difference between my idea and the HP series is that I’m trying to theme different things in the book according to Biblical principals. So, I don’t really envision a “wondrous wizardly world”, but rather a bleak place (quite close to our own) where magic is merely a power with consequence and not the type of things kids learn at school.

      I’ve been working out a story, so I’ll tell you what I have at this point:
      It’s set in an alternate universe close to our own. (set in the “Roaring Thirties” yes, I know)
      Basically, magic isn’t something like a small power to possess. It’s the force that “leaks” though the “barriers” through the universe. This is not really a Christian allegory, but is Christian-based. Life is sacred. Power comes with a price. Basically Biblical themes worked into this world’s sense.

      As for the story itself, the main protagonist is are twins. (Not too many stories use that so I’ve decided too, heh heh….) They both show the potential of being magic “wielders”. The few chosen to actually be able to manipulate the otherwise forbidden source of the universe. But, unfortunately, like all stories, there’s the antagonist. His goal is to find the source of the magic and hopefully break down the barrier in order to become as “god”. The twins are thrust into an adventure to stop him and his followers. Along the way, they meet allies which includes a cynical man who is against magic for what it did to him a long time ago, a girl who is also on her way to be a “wielder”, and pet Deviation. (something that can morph into multiple forms)

      And enemies, which include but are not limited to the villain himself, his son, the villain’s followers, and one creepy smart mastermind who really just wants to kill everyone. He is absolutely evil while the villain has more of a tragic backstory. You’ll see how it works out.

      Okay, there’s a lot more characters for either side but I think that those are the main ones. (sorry, I haven’t worked out names yet as I’m not sure if they should be regular names or stuff like Harry Potter names)

      I want to make this a series so that I can continue even after the first adventure. but for now, I’d like to get some of you guys’ opinion on it first.

      I’ll also be posting mini-biographies of the characters.
      Please post your opinions and what you think as I’m trying to make this story as great as possible. This is really the first draft so I wouldn’t be surprised if the final book is only slightly like what I’ve just said here. Anyways, thanks guys!


      @daeus
      , @aratrea, @catwing, @Aislinn-Mollisong, @that_writer_girl_99, @kate-flournoy, and…. I haven’t really memorized your tags. Sorry! heh heh… Anyone else willing to drop by and comment. Thanks! If you have any questions, I’d be happy to answer as well!

      Life's a cruel joke, so you have to laugh at it sometimes.

      #48754
      Aislinn Mollisong
      @aislinn-mollisong
        • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
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        Well, um….Can’t really say much here. It sounds cool, though! I think you should do rather normal names, since, you know, “Hermione”. Good luck!

        ENTP, Aether-borg Hero with cape obsession and fascination with swords.
        https://forums.theaetherli

        #48755
        Daeus
        @daeus
          • Rank: Chosen One
          • Total Posts: 4238

          The story sounds solid from what you’re telling me. *thumbs up*

          I do, however, wonder about the story world. It’s not that I think it’s wrong to do what you’re doing, but I wonder if it’s right. A force that leaks through cracks int he universe sounds mystical and there doesn’t appear to be a God in your story. I certainly believe that fantasy worlds should be different even in major ways, but I’m skeptical of making them fundamentally different. Your characters may be moral, for instance, but they will have no basis for morality. Man will ultimately decide truth, right, and wrong. I can see a case for altering the fundamental nature of the universe if it provides a really powerful context to make your point, but it still seems like a sticky issue. It’s not something I’d want to do.

          While I think coming up with story ideas by twisting cliches is a great idea, I think an even better idea is coming up with stories based on your theme. Whatever fits the theme best is best, I believe. A powerful story is more unique than a different story, really.

          🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢

          #48756
          Joseph Darkgrate
          @xonos-darkgrate
            • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
            • Total Posts: 162

            Does this sound good:
            The “Mymar twins” ?

            Malachi Mymar (the boy)
            Mikayla Mymar (the girl)

            Xavier Daire (the cynical grumpy guy)

            Korianna Indigo (the other girl)

            Garret Shaw (the villain himself)

            Arthur Abbot (the villain’s son)

            Tabbart Hale (that evil mastermind)

            opinions? These are just what I can come up with at this point…

            Life's a cruel joke, so you have to laugh at it sometimes.

            #48759
            Catwing
            @catwing
              • Rank: Chosen One
              • Total Posts: 2557

              @xonos-darkgrate I’m going to have to think on this a bit more. But for starters…

              The few chosen to actually be able to manipulate the otherwise forbidden source of the universe

              Why is it forbidden? By who? Why can they wield it?

              @daeus
              had some good advice.
              Also this could be an allegory. If you wanted.

              Those names could work. The Mymar twins sounds intriging. You don’t want to have names that are too hard to remember. (Just keep that in the back of your head)

              IMMA KAPEEFER! Til we're old and gray!

              #48768
              Kate Flournoy
              @kate-flournoy
                • Rank: Chosen One
                • Total Posts: 3976

                @xonos-darkgrate what @Daeus said, basically.

                Otherwise I think it looks very solid. You seem to already have a lot of thematic material (foils and such) to work with, so you’re starting out with a wide perspective and plenty of stuff to juggle around. Also you seem to know what to do with that stuff, which is always a plus. XD

                As for names… hm. I love the ones you picked out, but they seem to have too many similar letters. If I look at them too long, my eyes cross. 😛 Maybe if I didn’t see them all lined up like that the effect wouldn’t be as startling.

                And may I just say I so appreciate you tackling the theme of the responsibility of power? SO MANY FANTASIES neglect that theme, and all of them have the room and potential to develop it so well. Fantasy is the best genre for that and it seems like practically no one wants to do it.

                Louise Fowler
                @perfectfifths
                  • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                  • Total Posts: 726

                  @xonos-darkgrate This sounds intriguing! And those names are pretty good, except the twins’ names are very similar. That’s probably what you’re going for, of course, but personally I like it when twins don’t have similar names, it makes them seem more individual. But it’s up to you!

                  And while I don’t really have a problem with making fantasy worlds really different (then again, I’ve never really tried anything like this 😛 ), I reckon you should consider what Daeus said, because maybe it isn’t right. I don’t know, and I wonder if anyone really does. But I also believe what counts is the author’s heart and how they portray their godless world, if it is. Showing evil as evil and good as good is important.

                  Currently reading Les Miserables

                  #48819
                  Joseph Darkgrate
                  @xonos-darkgrate
                    • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
                    • Total Posts: 162

                    Hey guys, thanks for all the opinions! I can’t really reply to all of them today so I’m going to try my best to say as much as I can tomorrow. Anyways, thanks for all the advice and I can’t wait to show you some edits I’ve made.

                    Life's a cruel joke, so you have to laugh at it sometimes.

                    #48820
                    Joseph Darkgrate
                    @xonos-darkgrate
                      • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
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                      Okay, so first. I’ve considered the storyline I’ve been making, and the concept of making an allegory, so I thought I’d just drop the act and admit that it’s more of an allegory than anything else.

                      So… I’ve made a few changes to explain things better and to fit the Bible more!

                      1. “magic” in this story is really God’s power. But when others use it for themselves, they allow Satan (who I haven’t figured out a role for yet) to corrupt what they do and their “magic” is no longer powered through God. (who also I haven’t figured out the role)

                      2. This makes more sense as when you become a “wielder” (Christian), you wield the power of God. If you choose yourself and the darkness, your power is still there but it is corrupted and bad.

                      3. Magic in this story is displayed in fights that represent spiritual battles. Only we get to see it as white beams of light against dark tendrils of evil. Somewhere along those lines. People like Xavier, who lost their faith, are left with grayish power nowhere close to what either side has in terms of strength and is left with scars on his hands representing guilt that came with his leaving of the wielders. (Christians) I hope that makes more sense.

                      4. I’m still working on a thing for God in these books. It’s really essential as otherwise the whole story is a bit stupid, but I’m trying to take my time as so many God-representations in fantasy books and others are overused.

                      I’ll talk more about the names tomorrow! I hope this makes sense and clears things up!

                      @daeus
                      @perfectfifths @catwing

                      Life's a cruel joke, so you have to laugh at it sometimes.

                      #48827
                      Daeus
                      @daeus
                        • Rank: Chosen One
                        • Total Posts: 4238

                        @xonos-darkgrate Good ideas. The one thing that confuses me is point 1. It sounds strange that Satan could manipulate God’s power. Maybe there’s there’s an outside force of power that God created and controls as a testing ground? I’m sure you’ll figure it all out.

                        🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢🐢

                        #48829
                        Louise Fowler
                        @perfectfifths
                          • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
                          • Total Posts: 726

                          @xonos-darkgrate @daeus Maybe it’s that, the power is used by everyone, but depending on who you use it through and for if it’s light or dark or grey. It could be like praying, if you pray to God (the only one you’re supposed to pray to), or to idols or other things.

                          Currently reading Les Miserables

                          #48831
                          Joseph Darkgrate
                          @xonos-darkgrate
                            • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
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                            Hm… @daeus, I considered that and it didn’t seem as strange in my opinion. Satan himself used to be one of God’s chief angels so I don’t think that it’s far off that he could be using the same form of power for nefarious uses.

                            Other than that, would it make more sense that “magic” in this story is more like a power made by God and used by the wielder’s (Christians), but the same power was also corrupted and sectioned off to Satan and his followers? That way the bad guys in this story, (though not directly serving Satan himself), use the dark power and are generally the enemies of the Wielders. It’s just that in this story, one group of these “Dark Wielders” wants to find the SOURCE of their dark power and are ultimately quite surprised to find the consequences of their sinful actions. So that’s more of an end to the story if anything right?

                            It’s all the same power, but depending on where your soul is placed is what type it brings out. Kind of like what @perfectfifths said.

                            Does that make more sense now?
                            Also, I think that I’ve kind of added more to Garret Shaw’s motive by changing the story to:

                            He is searching for the source of Dark Power in hopes of having all of it to himself.

                            That’s kind of the same thing, but I think it makes more sense with what I’ve just recently added. Heh, heh… what he doesn’t know is that there’s already a master of the Darkness….

                            Anyways, what do you think?

                            Life's a cruel joke, so you have to laugh at it sometimes.

                            #48833
                            Joseph Darkgrate
                            @xonos-darkgrate
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                              Also, do you think I should add some romance to the story? The Mymar twins aren’t really young in the beginning unlike the start to the Harry Potter stories. I think that they would already be older than 16 or even higher. But I’m making it a point in the stories that they look younger than they should for some reason.

                              Anyways, I’ve ALSO read up on you guys’ articles on romance and I think it’d actually be a good idea to show a romance not fully blossoming, but ending up with an important character sacrificially giving up his/her life to save them all or merely just the person he/she truly loved. I’m not planning to go really far into the romance as I have no experience whatsoever with it and I don’t want to make things weird, but I really feel that having a character die like that and for those reasons might emphasize on certain things like:

                              1. Christ-like love for all (in this case, it’s also for the other person in the relationship)

                              2. That we all have to die at sometime and that death isn’t the end. (ALSO emphasized when we see the character possibly come back later)

                              3. Not all romances end with both ends alive. (so a semi-Romeo and Juliet)

                              Anyways, tell me what you think!

                              Life's a cruel joke, so you have to laugh at it sometimes.

                              #48834
                              Joseph Darkgrate
                              @xonos-darkgrate
                                • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
                                • Total Posts: 162

                                Okay, in regards to @catwing ‘s questions,
                                I changed some things. The power isn’t expressly forbidden, but you can’t really have it in “full power” until you choose to accept the role. (Christians / Christ)

                                On the other hand, many would rather selfishly serve themselves or even the Devil himself and harvest the same power but on an opposite side. (Satanist or cults / Sin and Satan)

                                Others like people who have lost either faith or are too ignorant to choose (Atheists / those who have never heard of God) or the “normal people” are may or may not ever wield either sides of power.

                                The power itself is God’s and it was always His from the beginning, but Satan ended up corrupting it in which God had to banish Satan and his demons to where they could only affect the current world. (the one the twins consequently live in)

                                Also, just as a side note, I’m using the words God and Satan as their roles in this story until I can figure out a story version for them.

                                Life's a cruel joke, so you have to laugh at it sometimes.

                                #48839
                                Joseph Darkgrate
                                @xonos-darkgrate
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                                  Hey guys! Just as a new thought, I wanted to say something.

                                  I think this story can be a bit more allegory-like. I’m definitely planning on writing more if I can finish this one. Anyways, I think that the different “bad guys” throughout the series can represent different challenges and enemies we as Christians face today since the Wielders do indeed represent us Christians. I think that in the first book, the bad guys like Garret Shaw etc. represent those who dabble in the dark arts and desire more without ever really knowing what they’re dealing with.

                                  But I can definitely see how I could add different things to represent even more in later books. Like people coming after the Wielders because they don’t want their power. (modern society)
                                  A bad guy who is able to give them anything they want or something along those lines. (temptation)
                                  and etc. There’s really an endless amount of things we Christians still have to face and that really does provide a lot of material I can use and put into the book. What do you guys think?

                                  Life's a cruel joke, so you have to laugh at it sometimes.

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