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Anna’s Savanna
Have you ever wanted to say that you have owned the weirdest pet in the world? A pet that no one else has owned before? A pet that makes people envy you? I have. I am a typical teenager living in a typical flat in a typical city. Boring. My name is Anna. Boring. I have straight brown hair. Boring. And nothing exciting ever happens to me. But one day that all changed.
One day my Dad came home from work and sat down on the couch. Usual. He picked up the paper lying on the arm beside him. Usual. But he didn’t open it, just stared off into the distance. Ok, not usual. Mum didn’t notice anything wrong until we were seated at the dinner table eating spaghetti bolognese. That is, Mum and I were. Dad just pushed it round his plate. Finally Mum realized something was up. She looked up at Dad. She looked down at the food. She looked back up at Dad.
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
“Nothing,” replied Dad.
I still don’t understand why people say that when there really is something wrong. It’s one of life’s great mysteries.
Mum raised an eyebrow. I guess she can’t understand it either.
“How was your day?” she queried.
Dad shrugged. “Ok.”
“Have you heard some bad news?” she tried.
Dad started to shake his head and then stopped.
Mum panicked. “It’s Grandma, isn’t it? Has she had a stroke?”
Dad looked bewildered. “Mum’s fine,” he said.
I could see that Mum was entering panic mode. I could imagine all the disasters and major catastrophes flying through her mind.
“Has your brother been eaten by a lion?” wailed Mum. “Oh darling, when’s the funeral?”
Dad reached out and took her hand. “Everyone is fine. Daniel is fine, in fact he emailed me today to ask if we’d like a holiday with him.”
There was a stunned silence at the table. My Uncle Daniel has one of the craziest and most adventurous jobs in the world. He’s a ranger at a game lodge in Masai Mara, Kenya. Totally awesome.
Mum got over her shock and began to protest.
“Us? Go to Africa? How could we afford it? Think how dangerous – and anyway we’re both swamped with work.”
“Hey,” I cut in. “There are swamps in Africa, too. And probably crocodiles living in them.” Ok, not the smartest thing in the world to say.
Dad shushed me and turned to Mum. “I know, so I’ve been thinking, what if we just send Anna?”
I choked on my pasta. When I’d finally regained my breath and assured Mum that I was fine, like ten times, I turned to Dad.
“Really? You’d let me go visit Uncle Daniel all by myself? Wow!”
“That’s just the thing,” protested Mum. “All by yourself. No. I’m sorry Anna, but I can’t do that. Daniel might be careless and you’ll be eaten by lions or charged by a rhino.”
“At least I have a debit card,” I quipped. Again, not a smart thing to say!
Mum gave me a ‘that’s-not-funny’ look. Dad’s lips twitched.
“I’m serious, Anna. Anything could happen out there.”
“Anything could happen here, Linda.” Dad looked Mum squarely in the eye. “She could be hit by a car, or a savage dog could jump a fence and maul her, or the flat could collapse if we had an earthquake or…”
I could see Dad was warming to his topic. If he continued, Mum would be so scared she’d never allow me to walk down the street to get an ice-cream. So I butted in again.
“I think we get the picture, Dad,” I said.
Dad caught on quickly. He stopped what he was going to say, probably that a meteorite might hit the school, and continued on with his point.
“It doesn’t stop us letting her go to school.” I knew the meteorite was going to be his next example. “Or letting her go to see her friends, or letting her live in the flat. Life is full of dangers but it shouldn’t stop us from doing things in life.”
I could tell that Mum knew she was beaten. I tried to reassure her.
“Don’t worry Mum. I’ll be really careful and do everything Uncle Daniel tells me. And I’ll look out for snakes and other dangerous creatures…”
Dad interrupted with a meaningful cough. “Why don’t you go to your room and start making a list of the things you need to take. Need mind you. You do have a luggage weight limit.”
I grinned and left the table. These summer holidays were going to be amazing. ‘Thanks, Uncle Daniel.’Two months later I stood at the airport in Nairobi. I was a bit worried I wouldn’t recognize my uncle since it had been about ten years since I saw him and I had only been six. But I needn’t have worried, straight away I spotted a man who looked just like my dad but dressed in camouflage clothing. I grabbed my bag and headed over.
“Uncle Daniel?” I asked.
“Anna?” he said at the same time.
We both nodded. Then laughed.
“Wow!” he said. “You’ve grown so tall.” He took my bag. “Come on. We need to get going if we want to make it back to Masai Mara by nightfall. We can talk in the car.”The following day Uncle Daniel took me for a drive through the reserve. My goal was to see as many different animals as possible during my stay here. Pride of lions. Tick. Hippos. Tick. A cheetah. Tick. An elephant so enormous it would have given Mum nightmares. Tick. I’m kinda glad that we didn’t go too close. He could have squashed us flat if he’d wanted to.
I was about to tell Uncle Daniel this when he stopped the jeep and pointed.
“Giraffes,” he said.
“Totally awesome,” I said, watching the giraffes reach out and pull leaves off the branches with their tongues.
“I love giraffes. I think they’re my favourite animal in the world.”
Uncle Daniel grinned. “Then you’ll love where we’re going next.”
“What?” I asked eagerly. “Tell me.”
But Uncle Daniel just gave me a mysterious look and started the jeep. I heaved a fake sigh of exasperation, but it wasn’t long before we stopped again.
Uncle Daniel handed me a spare pair of binoculars. “I don’t want to get too close.”
I raised the binoculars to my eyes.
“Whoa!” I cried. “Babies! Baby giraffes!”
“It’s the giraffes’ calving ground,” Uncle Daniel informed me.
“Totally neat,” I agreed. “And totally sweet.”
My eyes swept over the group of babies and mothers and stopped at a mother and calf beside the river.
“Has that baby just been born? I think its mum is trying to help it stand.” I said.
Uncle Daniel raised his own binoculars and took a look.
“No-o. I think it’s stuck in the mud, up to its belly. It doesn’t happen often but it does happen. The crocs will feed well tonight.”
I stared at my uncle. “How can you state that so matter-of-factly?” I asked crossly.
“Hey,” Uncle Daniel tried to soothe me. “It’s a fact of life, Anna.”
“Can’t you do something? You know, dig it out?”
“It’s not poss…” Uncle Daniel stopped mid sentence and gazed at the helpless calf through the binoculars. He glanced at me. “Ok. We’ll try. Just don’t get your hopes up, even if we get it out it might not survive.”
But still he grabbed the radio and spoke a brief conversation in Swahili with someone back at the lodge. Then he hooked the handset back up and turned to me.
“The men are getting the gear we’ll need and then they’ll head over here.”Thirty minutes later, six African men from Uncle Daniel’s patrol group arrived with spades, ropes and straps. We drove slowly towards the two giraffes. As we approached, the mother became agitated and moved off a bit. This pleased Uncle Daniel and we followed her, the jeep bumping over the rough ground, until she was a safe distance away. When we returned to the baby, the men had unloaded the gear and two men were preparing to start digging around the baby’s front legs. Another two, rifles at the ready, watched the water for crocodiles. I wondered if that would make my mum feel better or worse.
As the men began digging, the calf began to throw her head around wildly. She let out a bleat of distress.
“Wait,” called Uncle Daniel. “Tie a cloth over her eyes first.”
This done, the work began in earnest. Half an hour later, the men had dug down to her knees. They switched places and Uncle Daniel and another helper began removing mud from under the calf’s belly. I could see the baby’s sides heaving. I didn’t know if it was because she was hot or scared. It might have been both. I reached out and gently touched her nose. Her nostrils quivered and her blue tongue came out and licked my hand.
“Don’t worry Savanna, we’ll get you out of this,” I murmured.
Uncle Daniel glanced up at me. “Anna’s Savanna.”
I grinned.
“Right, said my uncle. “Strap please, Anna.”
I passed it over and Uncle Daniel slid it under Savanna’s belly. At this point, the patrol member Uncle Daniel had assigned to watch Savanna’s mum joined us.
“She’s disappeared,” he said, jerking his head in the direction of where the mum had been.
Uncle Daniel grunted in annoyance.
“Hopefully she’ll come back when we’re done. Right, now let’s have a shot at pulling this one out.”
The five men grabbed the rope and heaved. Savanna didn’t budge.
“Let’s use the jeep.”
They attached the rope to the tow point and one of the men slowly reversed the jeep. The rope became taut and inch by reluctant inch the mud gave up its victim. Five minutes later Savanna lay on the bank. We washed the mud off her while Uncle Daniel gently felt her legs. He breathed a sigh of relief.
“No bones are broken. Now we just need to hope her mum is nearby.” He glanced at the setting sun, then turned to his men. “Meshack, Kopano, take the jeep and see if you can find her.”
We waited in silence for the men to return. Uncle Daniel alternated between massaging Savanna’s legs and trying to make her stand, but she was too exhausted to even attempt it.
“What happens if her mum’s not around?” I asked eventually.
“If she was on her own she wouldn’t last the night. If a crocodile didn’t get her, the lions or hyenas would. But I’m sure her mum hasn’t gone far.”
Just then the scouts returned. “No sign of her anywhere.”
My uncle seemed to avoid looking at me. “Please Uncle Daniel, please. We didn’t dig Savanna out just to leave her for the lions or hyenas or…”
Uncle Daniel rested a hand on my shoulder. “Ok,” he said. “Let’s take her home.”The trip back was uneventful. I sat beside Savanna and spoke softly to her. I told her about where I lived and about school. I told her that because I lived in a flat I wasn’t allowed a pet, but she was better than any dog or cat. Uncle Daniel glanced in the rear view mirror at us.
“Don’t get too attached, Anna,” he warned.
‘Too late,’ I thought.
“She needs to get back to her mum as soon as possible.”
I nodded.When we got to the reserve, we made a straw bed for her in the shed where the jeeps and other equipment were kept. Savanna lay very still. Uncle Daniel got a bottle and went to heat up some special milk formula.
I looked up when Uncle Daniel returned. “Is she going to make it?”
“She’s dehydrated, which this should hopefully fix,” he said handing the bottle of milk to me. “And because she’s been unable to move all day, her legs are stiff and cold.” He settled down and began to massage them again.
I tried to tempt Savanna with the bottle, but she took no notice. I glanced questioningly at Uncle Daniel.
“Offer your fingers first. And then when she’s sucking them, slide the teat in and slide your fingers out.”
I tried this and got her sucking the bottle, but as I was removing my fingers she stopped.
“Keep trying. She’ll get the idea in a moment.”
I had to try three more times before Savanna was sucking happily at the bottle of milk. I grinned at Uncle Daniel and he smiled back.
Silence hung in the air for a bit.
“Guess you never thought you’d be doing this, did you?” Uncle Daniel said.
I shook my head. “I’ve always wanted to have the weirdest pet in the world.” I looked down at Savanna and stroked her neck. I looked back at my uncle to find him staring at me.
“Savanna’s not a pet, Anna.”
“Yeah, I know but…”
“No ‘buts’.”
“But I want her to be safe. It’s so dangerous out there. Anything could happen.”
I could feel tears coming to my eyes. Uncle Daniel reached over and gave my shoulder a squeeze.
“I know. A ranger gets to see close up how cruel things can be in the wild. But it would be even more cruel to keep Savanna locked up. Life is full of dangers but it shouldn’t stop us from letting Savanna do things in her life.”
I smiled a weak smile. “You really are my dad’s brother.”
Savanna, who had finished her milk, chose that moment to struggle to her feet. We moved aside and let her get up. She was a bit shaky on her feet, but she was standing.
“Good girl, Savanna,” said Uncle Daniel. “You’ll be ready to head back tomorrow.”Early the next day, Uncle Daniel, the men and I watched as Savanna slowly walked toward the group of mothers and their babies. One female took a few steps out of the herd.
“That will be Savanna’s mum,” said Uncle Daniel.
The two walked toward each other. Then her mum reached out her long neck and sniffed her baby. She could probably smell human on her because she started to wash Savanna all over. I let out a huge sigh of relief.
Uncle Daniel glanced sideways at me. “Happy? Cause you’ve still got a whole week left and a lot more animals to see. Hint, hint”
I grinned at him. “Sure. I’m happy. That is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. Now, let’s go and find a charging rhino. I’ve brought my debit card.”
Uncle Daniel was still laughing as we drove off.Hey, I like this! I love the quirky, matter-of-fact narrator voice and the concise, efficiently steady pace.
Only a few things— this line
and spoke a brief conversation in Swahili
is a little odd. I think it’s just the ‘spoke a brief conversation’. Is there another way to say this?
Also, I would have liked a description of Savanna (fitting name for a giraffe, by the way— love it) at one point or another. Her gangly legs. Her spotted coat. Her wide brown eyes with long, curly lashes— you know how beautiful giraffe’s eyes are. I can imagine it, but readers are an inordinately lazy lot and prefer it already to be there for them. 😉 😛Also, I’m not quite sure what the whole thing was about the debit card— why is that important?
But excellent line with which to end the story. I loved it! Good work! 🙂
@kate-flournoy – How could I forget a description of Savanna? Especially her eyes!!! I’ll add that to the story for sure.
I’ll have a look and see if there is another way to say that line.
With the debit card it’s a bit of a joke in our family. When you get charged you have to pay. So when a rhino charges you (money) you pay him. Does that make a bit more sense???Oh! Okay, yes, that’s hilarious! Maybe just insert a little explanation like that into the story, otherwise it totally goes over the reader’s head. 🙂
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
“Nothing,” replied Dad.
I still don’t understand why people say that when there really is something wrong. It’s one of life’s great mysteries.Loved this! 😉
INTJ - Inhumane. No-feelings. Terrible. Judgment and doom on everyone.
I love that part too. I think my favourite line bit though is:
Another two, rifles at the ready, watched the water for crocodiles. I wondered if that would make my mum feel better or worse.And here is another story that I have written @anna-brie Now I really loooooove this one. I actually have things to fix up, but I had already posted it. Enjoy!
Nice. I had a thought about this bit:
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
“Nothing,” replied Dad.
I still don’t understand why people say that when there really is something wrong. It’s one of life’s great mysteries.As far as I know saying nothing is wrong, or more commonly that you’re fine when it’s not true is something women do more that men. But nothing actually was wrong, so it still worked.
Yeah. The more I thought about it the more I realized that you were probably right. I’ll still be leaving it in though. If I base it on my parents, they probably wouldn’t actually talk about it at the dinner table and if my mum did ask, Dad would probably say ‘talk to you later’ But I want Anna to be part of the conversation, so that was my way of working it together. Thank you for the feedback though.
@aratrea If you have the time, I’ve love your feedback with the rest of the story. 😀
This is really good, @bluejay! 😀 I like the characters’ chemistry and how they interact. And I think I’ve already said this, but I really love the humor in it (and the dinner table scene 😉 ).
A couple thoughts:The following day Uncle Daniel took me for a drive through the reserve. My goal was to see as many different animals as possible during my stay here. Pride of lions. Tick. Hippos. Tick. A cheetah. Tick. An elephant so enormous it would have given Mum nightmares. Tick.
Ok, I love the last part about the elephant 😉 …but I was a bit confused at first when she started naming off animals…
“My goal was to see as many different animals as possible during my stay here.”
After that sentence (when she’s naming different animals) I wasn’t completely sure if she was talking about the animals she was seeing, or the animals she wanted to see. And maybe the “Tick” after every animal sorta threw me off… Is she referring to a real tick, or is there maybe a ticking sound coming from the jeep…? Don’t get me wrong, though. That part is funny and I liked it after I realized what you mean’t. I think there might be a better way of making that paragraph a little easier to understand on the first read. Maybe instead of putting a period after every animal, you could put a comma? For example:
“A pride of lions, a tick, hippos, another tick, a cheetah,another tick, an elephant so enormous it would have given Mum nightmares… ticks…”
That’s just a way I might word it, but does that explain my point of view better? Maybe I’m the only person who had trouble with that paragraph (no doubt! 😉 Haha), but anyway… you have a great story BlueJay! 😉 😀 Great job with it. Keep it up! 🙂
Would it make more sense if you used “check mark” or “check” instead of “tick”?
…unless you really are talking about ticks… 🙂Yep that would work. I could even mention a check list here. Thank you. 😀 😉 And “check” would work.
So glad you enjoyed it. It is definitely one of my favourites. 😀My assorted thoughts on this piece:
-As I said in my critique, the humor in this story is great and is still great this time around. Thumbs up from me for that.
-I second most of what other people have already said about the debit card and ticks.
-I really liked the parallels you were drawing between Anna and Savanna in terms of the spectrum between risk and safety. Gave it some nice resonance in tying the ending and beginning together and also made for a good theme, which was subdued but appropriate for this kind of short story. It could perhaps be a bit better executed if you went on in the ending to show her thoughts on her life in Africa compared to her boring life back home, just to finish up wrapping up all those threads, but this is pretty good as it is now.I enjoyed reading the short story overall: it was entertaining, and it also had a nice theme going on in the story, so nice work!
Editor-in-Chief Emeritus. Guiding authors at Story Embers.
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