Home Forums Fiction Writing General Writing Discussions A Catwing Christmas

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  • #58613

    Lady Iliara
    @lady-iliara
    • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
    • Total Posts: 136

    @catwing LOLOLOLOLOL

    😆

    Could I make a cameo at some point, pretty please?? 😁😁😁 I’m very arbitrary, Aethasian, and all-round LOTR geekish. And I enjoy logic, rearranging sentences, and the etymological, literal, symbolic, and sarcastic meaning of words….

    If you can fit me in, I would be honored. 🍪 🍪 🍪 💥

    👰🏻🦊💥
    ENFJ-T. Arbitrary. Greet at your own risk. *trips on a rock*

    #60008

    Catwing
    @catwing
    • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
    • Total Posts: 1704

    Sure! *adds you to list* @lady-ilara I’m trying to make sure I don’t forget any of the common forum creatures.

    Ambassador of the Kingdom of Allore
    Writing a Catwing Christmas that is as madder as the hatter.

    #60009

    Catwing
    @catwing
    • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
    • Total Posts: 1704

    @lady-iliara see above…

    Ambassador of the Kingdom of Allore
    Writing a Catwing Christmas that is as madder as the hatter.

    #60010

    Lady Iliara
    @lady-iliara
    • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
    • Total Posts: 136

    Thanks! @catwing 😄

    👰🏻🦊💥
    ENFJ-T. Arbitrary. Greet at your own risk. *trips on a rock*

    #60513

    Catwing
    @catwing
    • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
    • Total Posts: 1704

    Catwing Christmas

    Part Three
    Dealing With Claws… And Others.

    “No.” The door groaned. “Just no.”
    “But we have to get through.” Hannah said. Her hair was now turned into pink petals. “Can’t you open the door to let us out?”
    “I am the door! What do I look like? A chair? A wall?” The door squeaked out.
    “You look like a jar.” Nice Cat picked up a cookie. /I almost wish I had fingers./ Catwing thought.
    “Am not! Look!” The door swung open and slammed shut. But not before Nice Cat had tossed a cookie to wedge it ajar. And the door turned into a glass jar.
    “I can’t believe that worked.” Nice Cat stood a bit stunned at herself.
    “Now we just have to find Claws.” Catwing started out into the hall. /Wait am I forgetting something?/ “Nice Cat do you know where Claws is being keep?”
    “The Wiser is interrogating him in the interrogation room.” Nice Cat examined the jar. The cookie she threw was inside.
    Daeus placed a cookie on his head since he didn’t have a raspberry. “Follow me.”
    They all followed him out of the room, up the hall and down the tower, until they reached the doorway of the interrogation room. Two guards with cloaks stood guard at the open doorway. The Wiser stared down a massive cat with red and white tuxedo fur who was sitting on the broken pieces of a chair. Losing his grip, the frog, still oversized, awkwardly tried to stay on top of the Wiser’s head.
    “Hello, hello.” Said one of the guards, Epicaddie.
    “Why is the Wiser interrogating Santa Claws?” Catwing asked.
    “That’s not Santa.” The other guard, Alia, a centaur, cast a glance at the cat. “That’s the giant cat that ate all the ice cream and raspberries. And he didn’t even ask for any, it was very rude.”
    “Catwing thinks Santa is a cat.” Seekjustice whispered to her. “She does have some pretty good points.”
    “Oh.” Alia blinked and looked back at the giant cat.
    “Because Santa /is/ a cat. How else could he eat all the cookies and /still/ find down any chimney?” Catwing walked into the interrogation.
    “What did you say?” The Wiser looked up from the cat at Catwing. “I thought you said Santa was a cat, but that is absurd.”
    “Merrow-pph.” Claws burped. /I want my food lawyer. I may be a bit stuffed with food./
    “That /is/ Santa.” Catwing pointed at Claws. “And he wants his food lawyer.”
    The Wiser blinked. “What now?”
    “Santa wants his rock.”
    “What?!” The Wiser looked between Claws and Catwing. “Food lawyer? Rock?”
    “His lawyer.” Catwing cocked her head. “Did you not read him his rights?”
    The Wiser squinted at her. “You opened the Wonder Portal didn’t you?”
    Catwing ignored him and closing her eyes began to recite the rights. “You have the right to remain silent, if you give up the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.”
    “Excuse me?”
    “You have to right to an attorney, if you can not afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you. Do you understand these rights? Do you wish to give up your right to remain silent and give a statement?” She wrinkled her nose. “No, no. That is not quite right. No that isn’t right at all.”
    “That /is/ right, every word. ” The Wiser frowned. “You opened the Wonder Portal. What were you thinking? Are you mad?”
    “Ah, yes, now I remember.” Catwing smiled, completely ignoring the Wiser. “You have the /left/ to remain resilient, if you give these lefts to remain resilient to elsewhere, anything you say will probably be used in a court of some kind or another, including but not limited to, tennis, basketball, golf, law, etc., for some sort of porpoise. You have rights to an lawyer, if you don’t own a lawyer, one can be borrowed from a friend, park, pond, or other place one can commonly find a lawyer laying around.” The Wiser facepalmed. “Do understand these lefts and rights? Do you wish to hand over the left to remain resilient and give up a statement and chocolate or other snack food? I’m a bit hungry myself.”
    The Wiser shook his head. “You’re madder than the hatter.”
    Catwing looked between the Wiser and Claws. “Did I miss something? Did Time get angry?”
    The Frog croaked.
    The Wiser groaned.
    “Marroff. Marrow. Maft.” Claws jutted out his bottom lip. /I thought the food was for me. People always leave food for me. The door was open wide to food./ The red and white cat started to cry.
    “Off with his head!”
    “What no! He still needs to have a court held!” Catwing sprung on to the table, spinning like a top on a mountain top, to see who had said something so insane.
    “You can’t just walk up to someone and have their head cut off!” Daeus shouted.
    Catwing darted out to see the Queen of Hearts her face redder than a painted rose yelling at King Daeus. “OFF WITH YOUR HEAD THEN!”
    “You are ridiculous!” Daeus drew his sword. “I must ask you to leave.”
    “Excuse me do you know where I can find a rock?” Catwing sat down and waited.
    The Queen of Hearts smiled wickedly. “Ah, the Duchess’s cat. You little troublesome creature.” She sneered. “Off with your head while you have a neck this time!”
    Catwing wrinkled her nose. “I am not her cat, I am a catwing.”
    “Absurd.” The Queen waved away at the sword. “Off with your head.”
    Giant cards came rounded the corner carrying a small blue and white droid. Though it was a bit awkward for them since their hands were directly attached to their top corners, so to hold anything with both hands they had to bend themselves. Their feet were also directly attached, meaning they had to waddle in order to get anywhere. It was almost comical, if not for the fact that was how they were. Catwing was very glad she had legs to attach her paws to her body. Even if she didn’t have opposing thumbs.
    “Why is it’s head not off yet?!” The Queen yelled.
    The guards shuddered and one wearing a black hood said. “Uh, your majesty it seems it is all a head, meaning I can’t cut it off of anything. Or perhaps all a body, in which case it has no head and so since there isn’t one, I can’t cut it off.”
    The droid beeped angrily. It’s lens zoomed in at the guard’s face.
    Daeus raised the sword up to the Queen of Hearts nose. “Again I ask you to leave, this is my kingdom and I will not let you cut off /anyone’s/ heads.”
    “Neither will I.” Aislinn held up her cybernetic arm, preparing to fire some sort of blast.
    Alia helped Addie onto her back. “Or I, or I.”
    “Pfft. Off with his, his and her heads” The Queen gestured at Stan, Daeus, and then Catwing. “Oh, how ghastly!” She made a face. “Please remove her of her dreadful arm, it is so robotic. And while you’re taking off that dreadful arm, off with her head.”
    Catwing shook her head. /For the Queen of Hearts she doesn’t seem to have much of a heart./
    “This is your last chance, leave now or I will be forced to use this.” Waving the sword inches from her face Daeus prepared himself.
    The Queen of Hearts sniffed. With her nose held high she turned on her heel and started walking off. She stopped and leaned toward one of her guards. Her hot breath made him sweat. “Oh, and make sure to get the Duchess’s Cheshire this time.”
    “I am not the Duchess’s Cheshire Cat! I am a catwing.” Catwing protested. A net dropped down on top of her. She flailed. The ropes only closed in on her. Her focus narrowed to her ropes. But voices shouted around her.
    “That was unwise!”
    “Adventure!”
    “A Sarah has been unleashed!”
    “Ribbit!”
    “Half, it is all the same to me.” /The Queen of Hearts, perhaps?/
    Catwing hissed and struggled to get out of the ropes that only seemed to close in on her.
    “Leave Stan alone! We are fire and terror and— Ack!”
    “Shiny!”
    “Meerrow.” /Oh, no! Attacking cards! Where’s food?/
    “Off with your head!”
    “Origami Cranes! Attack!”
    “Ack! Bird attacks on us. We though outnumber!”
    “Argh! No that’s terrible grammar!”
    “Ribbit!”
    “Prepare for pizza to strike back!”
    Squeezing her eyes shut Catwing attacked the ropes with her teeth.
    /Rrrooooooaaarr!/
    “Run! There’s a tiger!”
    “Go Reggie!”
    “Taste the wrath of my glitter!”
    “Really Shannon?”
    “What? Glitter can be a weapon, watch this.”
    Catwing stopped, exhausted and took some deep breaths. /It’s chaos out there./
    “Why are you throwing Princess Bride GIFs?”
    “What? There’s one for everything.”
    “Ribbit!”
    “Raspberries!”
    “Fear my pizza sword!”
    “So yummy looking.”
    /This is taking to long. I need to think happy thoughts./ She grinned, slowly starting with her tail she began to vanish.
    /Beep! Beeeeep!/
    “Chasm beast coming through!”
    “Only me and my friends can try a take over! Gggrruufff!”
    The rest of Catwing started to vanish too, and the ropes fell down where her body had been. Until only her grin was left, then that vanished with her.
    She opened her eyes. Gray mist swirled throughout the nothingness. This was a mysterious place. It was her happy place.
    She looked down. There was /the/ Rock.

    Also Starring…
    @alia
    Santa Claws
    The Queen of Hearts
    Stan
    Card Guards
    @supermonkey42
    @Sam Kowal
    @jane-maree
    @jessi-rae
    The rock

    *had way too much fun making up what people were shouting* *decided on who said what in the shouting scene* *is grinning like crazy*

    @lady-iliara Don’t worry you and the other Aethasians on KP are probably going in the next one… Rock. *bursts out laughing*

    @dekreel @daeus @dragon-snapper @daughteroftheking

    Ambassador of the Kingdom of Allore
    Writing a Catwing Christmas that is as madder as the hatter.

    #60521

    Dekreel
    @dekreel
    • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
    • Total Posts: 1406

    @catwing   AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYAYYAAHYAAHAYAYAAYYAYAAAAAAAA! *GASP* *WHEW!*

    This is SO cool! ACK, OMIGOSH, the Queen of hearts, and Reggie and Aislinn’s arm, and Cheshire Catwing, the Lefts, the Frog, Daeus……

    I can hardly contain myself!  *scratches all the walls and tables and chairs ecstatically*

    “Chasm beast coming through!”

    I literally screamed when I read that line

    😀 😀 😀 😀

    • This reply was modified 1 month, 1 week ago by  Dekreel.

    Pronounced DEE-kreel. ENFJ -T (with a hint of ENFP)
    And no, I am not a wolf. I’m NOT!

    #60522

    Ben P.
    @supermonkey42
    • Rank: Loyal Sidekick
    • Total Posts: 162

    @catwing 😀 See, Everyone should be a droid! They can’t be beheaded.

    You have rights to an lawyer, if you don’t own a lawyer, one can be borrowed from a friend, park, pond, or other place one can commonly find a lawyer laying around.” The Wiser facepalmed.

    Yes, those lawyers are always lying around. 😀

    #60532

    Catwing
    @catwing
    • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
    • Total Posts: 1704

    @dekreel Yay! I knew I should keep those lines. *grins* And everyone will wonder who says some of them… Or not.
    And so began my career of making peoples scream… 😛

    @supermonkey42 yes, or be part Cheshire (since you could make your body vanish and then they can’t behead you. Like in Alice in Wonderland)
    Yep. Especially when they are rocks. Or lily pads. Or unassuming toads. 😀

    @sam-kowal I messed up your tag.

    Ambassador of the Kingdom of Allore
    Writing a Catwing Christmas that is as madder as the hatter.

    #60540

    Sam Kowal
    @sam-kowal
    • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
    • Total Posts: 437

    @catwing XD XD XD 😀 😀 😀 😀 *Stan and I roll around in laughter*

    That… is hilarious. I love how it captures the spirit of Alice in Wonderland. 😀 Nice to see the Queen of Hearts coming through the wonder portal, too.

    *screams along with @dekreel*

    *Giarstanornarak tries to melt chair*

    #60542

    Catwing
    @catwing
    • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
    • Total Posts: 1704

    @sam-kowal Thank you.
    Yes, I am reading Through the Looking Glass now.
    Yes, even though she keeps yelling, “Off with their head!”
    *wonders how many people will scream* *Wonders if more people will scream next time*

    Ambassador of the Kingdom of Allore
    Writing a Catwing Christmas that is as madder as the hatter.

    #60628

    Jane Maree
    @jane-maree
    • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
    • Total Posts: 853

    @catwing

    Oh my word. XD

    Writing Heroes ♦ Writing Hope // janemareeauthor.com.au


    Catwing
    @catwing
    • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
    • Total Posts: 1704

    @jane-maree You said you were a pizza ninja… Kinda what I pictured. 😛

    Ambassador of the Kingdom of Allore
    Writing a Catwing Christmas that is as madder as the hatter.

    #60655

    Aislinn Mollisong
    @aislinn-mollisong
    • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
    • Total Posts: 420

    @catwing *sniff* I happen to take offense to that, Queen Of Hearts. It is not robotic. It is an Aether-borg prosthetic gauntlet connected to my Aethermatron heart. WAY more complicated, hon.

    BRAVO, CATWING! That was absolutely amazing!!!! No, it was PERFECTION! *applauds*

    ENTP, Aether-borg Hero with cape obsession and fascination with swords.
    https://forums.theaetherli

    #60659

    Catwing
    @catwing
    • Rank: Eccentric Mentor
    • Total Posts: 1704

    @aislinn-mollisong She still thinks it looks ghastly. 😛
    Thank you! I’m preparing the next part now. *grins*
    Part 4: The Rock and The Frog
    *vanishes to go write*

    Ambassador of the Kingdom of Allore
    Writing a Catwing Christmas that is as madder as the hatter.

    #60681

    Jane Maree
    @jane-maree
    • Rank: Knight in Shining Armor
    • Total Posts: 853

    @catwing it’s hilarious. XD

    Writing Heroes ♦ Writing Hope // janemareeauthor.com.au

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